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Parenting isn’t the same everywhere. And that’s exactly what author Sara Zaske showcases in her book Achtung Baby: An American Mom On the German Art of Raising Self-Reliant Children. The mama, and expat living in Germany took her new country’s view on child rearing and made it into a whole big “thing.” And we think it’s pretty special.

Your kiddo needs your help. Hey, that’s what being a parent means. At least, that’s what part of being a parent means. But do kids always need adults to intervene? According to Zaske, the answer is no. While living in Berlin the mama noticed that adults, whether they were parents or teachers, didn’t jump to step in and smooth things over every time the littlest argument broke out between children.

Instead of forcing a totally unauthentic, “sorry” out of the offending child or mediating the situation, the Germans tend to let their kids work it out on their own. This doesn’t mean the German littles immediately mend fences, have a good ol’ Kumbaya, hug and make up. Nope. That doesn’t happen each and every time. But helping children to help themselves in the face of conflict can make them problem-solvers and, as Zaske found out with her own daughter, peacemakers.

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Do you think that stepping in and mediating a child-to-child conflict is okay or not? Share your thoughts in the comments below.