You know all about what having a baby will be like. Right? You read the books, the blogs and everything else you could get your hands on. Come on, you’ve done the research — and that totally makes you an expert. Umm, maybe not. You think you know what mommy-ing will be like. But then it happens. Boom… it’s nothing like you expected. You love this teeny tiny little person so much that your heart is about to burst. But you kind of can’t process it. That’s probably because you haven’t slept in days.

One mom laid out what you really need to know to prepare for a new baby. That’s right. She’s got it all down — in 21 simple steps.

Laura Mazza, of Mum on the Run, created a hilariously true list of tips to help soon-to-be moms understand what their new job requires. There are the obvious, “Wake up at 4 a.m.” And then there are the completely true (and super-funny) tips, such as, “Dress yourself, then pour milk on yourself” and “Eat cake, nothing but cake.”

This list is not to be missed. Seriously. It will totally describe everything that you’ll feel, do and go through in the beginning. Check out the Mum on the Run Facebook page to get the full list of tips. Really. Don’t miss it.

What’s your number one tip for preparing for a baby? Tell us in the comments below.