Got a little comedian in your household? These Valentine’s Day jokes for kids are sure to crack a smile sweeter than any chocolate around. Let the kids memorize a few to share with friends, or write them on a note for V-Day lunches. Either way, you’re sure to get a laugh, a hug and probably at least one eye roll. Scroll down to get punning.

photo: platinumportfolio via Pixabay 

 

1. What do you call two birds in love?

Tweethearts!


2. What did the stamp say to the envelope on Valentine’s Day?

I’m stuck on you!

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3. What did one volcano say to the other?

I lava you!

 

4. What did the cucumber say to the pickle?

You mean a great dill to me.


5. How did the phone propose to his GF?

He gave her a ring.

 

6. What did the one sheep say to the other?

I love ewe!


7. And how did the other sheep respond?

You’re not so baaaaaa-d yourself

 

8. What did the farmer give his wife for Valentine’s Day?

Hogs and kisses.

 

9. And what did the tweenager give his mom? 

Ughs and kisses!


10. What did one light bulb say to the other light bulb on Valentine’s Day?

I wuv you watts and watts!

 

11. What do you say to an octopus on Valentine’s Day?

I want to hold your hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand!

 

12. What do you call a ghost’s true love?

His ghoul-friend.

 

13. What do you write in a slug’s Valentine’s Day card?

Be my Valen-slime!

 

14. Knock Knock

Who’s there?

Luke

Luke who?

Luke who got a Valentine!

 

15. Why is Valentine’s Day a good day for a party?

Because you can really party hearty!


16. What kind of flowers should you NOT give on Valentine’s Day?

Cauliflowers!


17. What do owls say to declare their love?

Owl be yours!


18. What did one bee say to the other? 

I love bee-ing with you, honey!


19. Knock Knock

Who’s there?

Olive

Olive who?

Olive you!


20. Why do skunks love Valentine’s Day?

They are very scent-imental creatures.

 

Looking for more age-appropriate jokes? You’ll love:

50 Best Jokes for Kids

Underwear Jokes for Kids 

—Amber Guetebier with Cathie Ericson

 

valentine's jokes