I know, I can’t believe it either. Your sweet and tiny baby is no longer quite so teeny tiny. She’s probably approaching toddlerhood and moving around like a mad woman. Gone are the days of putting the baby down and expecting her to remain there contentedly.
You might have always known that you wanted a second baby at some point, or you might have been on the fence after you had your first. But more and more frequently you’ve found yourself wondering: are we ready for another one?
It doesn’t help that from your baby’s first birthday onward you’ve probably been getting the question, “When’s the next one coming?” There’s no great answer. The lack of sleep combined with the whole scale change to your life during infancy, it may be something you feel like you’re never ready to tackle.
The age old question – should we have another or shouldn’t we, is something that many couples debate for years. If you’re having a second baby, make sure you know what to expect and that you’ve gotten your financial plan in order.
If you’ve been on the fence for a while and are debating having another, check out these tell-tale hints that you may be more ready than you think to take the plunge. Here are the top ten signs that you might be ready for another baby:
1. Everything seems SO tiny.
Was your little one ever really that little?
2. You can’t quite remember the last time your babe had that new baby smell.
I mean, she smells good, but that specific new baby scent seems to have disappeared overnight.
3. You’re in the midst of or have considered potty training.
Okay, when your kiddo pees all over the floor or poops her pants you’re probably not in the optimal frame of mind to be considering adding to your brood. However, if you’re close to potty training that means you’re almost out of diapers. Which meann…You could do it again.
4. Your firstborn carries around baby dolls and asks for a baby.
This is adorable and also maddening. As if you weren’t having a hard enough time deciding on whether or not to have another baby, you now have to worry about disappointing your current child.
5. You finally lost all the baby weight from the first go round.
I know, right? You finally hit that goal on the scale and now you might be willing to ruin it?! This is a good time because it signals your body is back in a pre-baby equilibrium. Getting pregnant when you still have 10 to 20 pounds to lose just makes it harder to get all off in the long run. Starting from neutral is a much better choice.
6. Sleeping through the night is no longer something that only happens to other people..
That first year I know it felt like you might never sleep again. And then, once it happened you were afraid for months it was going to go away. Once you’re solidly sleeping through the night again it’s SO hard to consider going back. But, it’s a reminder of how far you’ve come. And you now know that even with another kid, you will sleep again. Eventually.
7. Sitting down and actually eating as a family isn’t a foreign concept. You haven’t had to eat with a baby in one arm for months now.
If you’ve been having real family meals it means that your little is now sitting in his or her own chair and feeding herself. This is a huge win and means your arms are free to now feed another one if necessary. (Or you could just enjoy feeding yourself for awhile.)
8. Everyone in your kid’s class at daycare now has a baby sibling.
This is NOT to say that you should have a baby because everyone else did. It’s just that once your older child starts seeing everyone else with sisters and brothers, she’s inevitably going to ask where hers is. No one should peer pressure you into adding to your family, but once all your kid’s friends have siblings you can bet you’ll get the question.
9. You’re no longer breastfeeding.
It’s so hard to think about getting pregnant when you’re still nursing and your body isn’t fully your own. Once you’ve weaned and have had some time to get back to your former self, you may be a little more willing to get pregnant and share yourself again.
10. You’ve blacked out labor from the first time.
It’s true. No one would ever have another child if they didn’t black out labor. Even if you, in theory, remember your birth experience, almost everyone blacks out the pain at some point. If you remembered in every acute detail what it was like there would be no siblings.
Should you have another baby?
That’s not to say that EVERYONE wants a second baby. There are actually studies that prove mothers of one are happiest. Just because you have nostalgia about those baby coos doesn’t always mean you’re ready to add to your family. Definitely weigh the pros and cons for your family, your goals, and your personal situation before you commit to a decision.
No one can tell you when you’re actually ready for a second baby. It’s something only you and your family can truly know. However, if you’ve experienced enduring nostalgia or hit any of the milestones above, you might just be more ready than you think!