Funniest Parenting Tweets of the Week

80% of Spring Break when you have kids is calculating how much longer until Spring Break is over.

— Mommy Cusses (@mommy_cusses) April 1, 2018

My son decided to play on a trampoline, but since we don’t own one he just jumped on every single one of our last nerves all day instead.

— HowToBeADad (@HowToBeADad) April 2, 2018

My 7yo sure yells “It’s not fair!” a lot for someone who doesn’t pay taxes.

— Dad and Buried (@DadandBuried) April 2, 2018

I just noticed that someone replaced the toilet paper roll. I’m now concerned that there is someone living here that I don’t know.

— Mommy Needs A Life (@mom_needsalife) April 2, 2018

Me: did you wash your hands?
Son: yes dad
Narrator: he did not wash his hands

— The Dad (@thedad) April 2, 2018

Funny how I’m exhausted all day until everyone in my house goes to sleep and then I feel great.

— NotJPo (@Peauxtassium) April 2, 2018

Going to Target at 10pm to purchase kids underwear and almond milk while wearing socks with my sandals is a stage in my life I did not see coming.

— Cydni Beer (@themessednest) April 4, 2018

It’s so cute how my kids think I’m going to let them in the car ever again after vacuuming it for two hours.

— OneFunnyMummy (@OneFunnyMummy) April 2, 2018

I know you're driving.

But your kid needs you to reach into the backseat real quick and hand them a crayon, fix their sock, dress their doll, punish their sibling for looking at them, and make a 5-course meal.

— Walking Outside (@WalkingOutside) April 5, 2018

I’ve reached the level of parenting where when my kids ask “what’s for dinner?” I just skip directly to the part where I tell them they’re going to have to eat it anyway.

— Sara Says Stop (@PetrickSara) April 3, 2018