Many many years ago my husband and I signed up for a childbirth class for our first child. I knew nothing about having a baby (he did as he had two daughters from his first marriage) and I wanted to make sure I knew what to expect (insert laughing emoji as birth is totally, completely, and utterly different from what you expect!). I was intending to have a natural birth and have a boy.

That’s not what happened.

Before we finished the courses, I had had an emergency c-section and a girl—for more details you can read all about it here.

So were the classes worth it then? I have 5 good reasons that say yes.

Reason #1: The Friends You Will Make
Annabelle, Tanya, Lisa and I met 22 years ago at a childbirth class. So yes, the class is worth it because I got a group of friends that, 22 years later, I’m still in contact with. We have shared tears, laughter, weddings, divorces, moving houses, moving countries, loss and birth. 

But what if you’re just going to take a one-on-one class? Is it still worth it then? I still say yes.

Reason #2: Childbirth Educators Know How Amazing You Are and Our Job Is to Make You See That Too.
The moment you say that you are pregnant people want to share information with you. It almost feels like a competition to share the worst story so that you are “prepared,” for the “horror,” to come. A childbirth educator has heard all of the stories and can help you see the process of birth in a different, more positive way.

You don’t often hear the amazing stories, the tales of birth being a beautiful golden, euphoric moment and it really can be—the whole thing can be just wonderful. It doesn’t always hurt and it can be the most loving, connecting, and life-affirming time of your life. You can be so empowered and so powerful that your ferocious beauty is mouth-droppingly awesome for all who are lucky enough to see it.

Reason #3: However You Have Your Baby, a Little Preparation Goes a Long Way
I offer classes either as part of a course or a standalone session that covers one aspect such as a c-section. If I had a penny for every time I’ve heard “I’m planning a natural birth—I won’t need the induction class,” I would have a lot of pennies! Very few of us want a c-section or induction but they happen and it is worth it to be prepared for that eventuality.

Why?

Well for example, with an induction you are often confined to the bed for monitoring—how else will you know how to alleviate the sensations that you may feel and to get the baby to come a bit quicker? It’s not lay on the bed and wait, that’s for sure! But in a class, we show you how you can help your body, how to breathe, and hopefully, give you some idea of what to expect and prepare your partner.

Reason #4: Your Support Person May Not Know What to Do!
So some of the questions that I have been asked by partners in childbirth classes: How long will it take? How involved am I? Where can I get a coffee at the hospital? Should I trust her to tell me when she’s ready to head to the hospital? If her waters break in the car will they stain the seats?  When they say they can see the head—what does that mean? How will I know she’s in labor? What can I do once the baby is born? How can I keep her energy levels up? Does it matter if I’m not there all the time?

Partners have the same questions you do and a whole load that you don’t. While you are birthing your baby, they are watching and it can be pretty stressful for some people to look at someone they love going through the sensations of birth. Classes not only tell them what to expect but also give them tools to assist you as well as a better understanding of what exactly their role should be.

Reason #5: The Internet Can Be a Scary Place
The final reason to take a childbirth class is that there is a lot of information out there and not all of it is accurate or positive. It can be an overwhelming place so take your time and make sure that you are getting information that is relevant to you and your partner. Connecting with an individual trained in childbirth can really help you alleviate some of the stress that you may be feeling in the run-up to the big day. Diminishing that fear can help reduce your labor time.

You still may not get the birth that you planned for but hopefully, you will understand the process and with the aid of the education you receive in the class be able to make the best, most informed decision for you and your baby.

This post originally appeared on bahbabelle.net.

I'm certified as a doula, breastfeeding counselor and Lamaze childbirth educator.  I'm British, living in Bahrain in the Middle East for the last 14 years. I have three daughters and I just want to show them that it doesn't matter your age, dreams can be followed. 

Recent research revealed a way to help children as young as 12-months deal with and possibly overcome behavior problems. The study, from the University of Cambridge, looked at the effectiveness of a six-session program on 300 families with young children.

The children in this study were divided into two groups—one group received routine healthcare support and the other participated in a combination of healthcare support and a targeted behavioral program. All of the young participants had already displayed early signs of behavioral problems.

Photo: Brett Sayles via Pexels

Researchers filmed the participants via an experimental program called the Video-Feedback Intervention to Promote Positive Parenting and Sensitive Discipline (VIPP-SD). Each 90-minute video taped session included everyday family situations, such as a meal or play-time. The child behavior pros then analyzed the clips and discussed successes and challenges with the parents. This gave the parents the chance to identify cues or signals from their children.

Five months after the start of the program, the researchers found the children who participated in the VIPP-SD sessions had lower behavioral problem scores than the children who only got routine healthcare.

Paul Ramchandani, Professor of Play in Education, Development and Learning at the University of Cambridge, said, “To provide this program in any health service would require investment, but it can realistically be delivered as part of routine care. Doing so would benefit a group of children who are at risk of going on to have problems with their education, behavior, future wellbeing and mental health.”

Ramchandani added, “There is a chance here to invest early and alleviate those difficulties now, potentially preventing problems in the longer term that are far worse.”

For more information, the full results of the research are published in JAMA Pediatrics.

—Erica Loop

 

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There’s no doubt about it, teachers everywhere have been going above and beyond for their students since the pandemic began. One teacher from Pennsylvania saw a need and set out to fill it. Using his stimulus check he made a difference in his students’ lives.

Matthew Pierce

Matthew Pierce, a teacher at Milton Hershey School wanted to help support his students who come from low-income families. As someone who grew up in a low-income household himself, Pierce used his stimulus check to buy Uber Eats gift cards to help provide meals for more than 40 students and families. 

When I knew that some students were going back to their home communities during the pandemic, I knew that there would be a challenge for their families to meet all of their basic needs. I decided that one thing I could do was to help with ensuring that they had one special meal at least. That this meal would alleviate at least one day’s worth of worry from the students and their families,” Pierce said. 

Pierce inspired by the generosity he was shown when he was a child. He said, “In particular, I had a paper route in middle school and my teacher, Mr. Fred Davis, would show up on harsh weather days at 5:30-6 a.m. and help me deliver papers. He did this unannounced and with no fanfare. He did this to help one of his students who had a need.” 

Matthew Pierce

To help Pierce’s efforts go further and to thank him for supporting his community, Uber has matched the $1,200 in gift cards to help Pierce provide even more meals for his students who are at home learning virtually. He said, “When I was contacted by Uber Eats I was humbled and excited. I was also stunned by their generosity.  I am excited that Uber Eats’ kindness will give me the opportunity to help even more students than I was able to before. With Uber Eats’ matching donation, my goal is to help 50 or more students and their families.”

As for the families, they have been very appreciative. Pierce shared, “A student let me know that they became the caregiver for their siblings when their single parent went to work. Because they had received the gift card, they were able to purchase food for them and their siblings during this time.”

—Jennifer Swartvagher

All photos courtesy of Milton Hershey School

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I have always thought in terms of possibilities. When I was younger, I used a coke bottle and filled it with ideas and goals I wanted to achieve. When I started my company, Bold New Girls, I set up a binder filled with blank paper, calling it my “binder of possibilities.” I spent time each day creating my dream job. Combined, these ideas convinced me that focusing on potential generated positive emotions and energy as well as momentum.

These experiences now help me teach both girls and boys that amidst uncertainty and change, they, too, can focus on opportunity. Positive psychology tells us that by focusing on the positive aspects of any event (losing a friend or adjusting to a new school routine), expressing gratitude for the highlights of your day, or using the language of strength such as, “I am so proud of myself for…”, one can feel more positive, hopeful, and even motivated to keep trying. I couldn’t agree more.

No doubt back to school is looking different than previous ones. Kids will likely be placed in learning pods in a new quarter system, encouraged to wear masks and frequently use hand sanitizer, and asked to practice the essential social distancing. Perhaps they won’t get to see all their friends as often, participate in as many after school activities, or feel the security of familiarity.

Even still, they can learn to embrace this time as a time of possibility. Here’s how parents can help:

1. Prepare your kids for what back to school means. This is two-fold—talk to them about what this could look like by painting the picture of possibilities—both the positives and challenges. Ask them what they are thinking, expecting, and wondering about. This fosters connection and conversation. Also, prepare them with their own supplies: mask, hand sanitizer, wet wipes, and tissues. Help them take ownership of their cleaning items and feel ready to do their part. The possibility of being prepared can help them feel in control and powerful.

2. Normalize this experience. It’s not to say a global pandemic “normal” in any means but it is the “new normal” that we are all navigating together. Knowing everyone is facing the same worries and transition does help. Together, watch videos and scroll through Instagram to see everyone—every day people and celebrities alike—wearing masks and socializing in new and creative ways. The possibility of normalcy and the “we’re all in this together” feeling, can help kids feel calm and secure.

3. Talk to them about their “what if’s.”  “What if we go back to lock down?” and “What if I face pressure to deviate from the COVID protocols?” or “What if I or someone I know contracts the virus?” These are all legitimate fears. Ask this key question, “Then what?” and explore some action steps for each concern—both the best-case and worst-case scenarios—so they gain balanced thinking. Remind them how much they have had to deal with so far and how these life experiences have already fostered resilience. Talking it out beforehand can alleviate their stresses and know they have a plan in place to rely on.

At the same time, talk to them about the possibility of how this return to school, though admittedly different, could be even better than returns prior. How? I don’t know entirely but I do know some of my clients have told me they like smaller classes (more teacher attention, less worry about peer judgment), they appreciate the rooms being cleaner (really) and it feels good to know they are helping flatten the curve and doing their best to protect everyone’s health and safety. They also enjoy a less busy schedule (where they have more downtime, playtime, and time to relax). The possibility of “even better” provides the possibility that a new way of being is different and, potentially, improved.

Yes, back to school is coming. We know this. What we don’t know is what it will be like. Why? This is because there are still questions and uncertainties. Yet, these unprecedented times can teach us about possibility and may prove to be a fabulous opportunity for kids and parents alike to grow.

Lindsay Sealey, BA, MA Ed, is the author of Growing Strong Girls: Practical Tools to Cultivate Connection in the Preteen Years and Rooted, Resilient, and Ready – now available on Amazon and Audible. She is the founder and CEO of Bold New Girls and Brave New Boys, and an instructor with Udemy.

 

I am a girl advocate and girls champion; the founder of Bold New Girls and Brave New Boys teaching and coaching for girls, boys, and their parents. As well, I am the author Growing Strong Girls and Rooted, Resilient, and Ready (available on Amazon and Audible). I am an international speaker and an instructor with Udemy. 

This year back to school preparations have been anything but normal. Working parents are scrambling trying to figure out how to maintain a positive work and life balance while managing distance or hybrid learning. Care.com surveyed working parents to find out what they would like to see and how they could alleviate the stressors caring for their children while returning to work. 

work from home

The COVID-19 Working Parents Survey reveals that the pandemic has not only made childcare more difficult, but women are often finding themselves picking up the slack as careers are impacted. The survey also found that with the announced limitations of schools and/or daycares as they re-open, 73% of parents plan to make major changes to their professional lives with 15% considering leaving the workplace altogether.

52% of working parents say that juggling childcare and work responsibilities has been harder during the COVID-19 crisis. This increases to 57% of those with a youngest child under 4 years old. Additionally, 66% of working parents agree that juggling childcare responsibilities with work responsibilities during the COVID-19 crisis has caused their productivity to suffer. 

The study found that women are picking up the slack. 57% of working women say that they’ve taken on most or all of the extra childcare responsibilities during the crisis, compared to just 8% of women who say their partners do more. However, 36% of men say they do the extra childcare work.

Workplace anxieties are on the rise. 52% of working parents agree that they hide childcare concerns because they worry that their employer or colleagues won’t understand.

43% of respondents say that their employers are more tolerant toward managing children while working than they were at the beginning of the COVID-19 crisis, compared to only 12% who say their employer is less tolerant. 84% of respondents who don’t currently receive childcare benefits say that receiving new employer-provided childcare benefits is important in order to continue working and raising children at the same time. 

Parents want more childcare benefits. Only 15% receive childcare benefits that are sponsored by their employer, and in addition, men are twice as likely to receive childcare benefits (22% to 11%).

—Jennifer Swartvagher

Featured photo:  Charles Deluvio on Unsplash

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Pregnancy comes with its highs (tiny little kicks, that first ultrasound image, growing an awesome human) and its lows (swollen feet, backaches, stretch marks). One thing every pregnant woman needs through it all is support—and not just the kind you get from a mom group. We’re talking gentle, targeted compression garments that help alleviate all of those aches and pains and speed up postpartum recovery: Motif Medical’s Maternity Compression Garments.

Made with moms in mind, these maternity compression garments are are FDA-listed and designed by healthcare professionals to provide comfortable and gentle compression where you need it most. Plus, Motif uses soft, breathable and supportive fabrics that are undetectable under your clothes.  Best of all, moms may qualify to receive theirs through insurance. Here are a few of the ways Motif supports mom during pregnancy and after delivery.

Whatever stage of pregnancy you’re in, Motif is ready to lend some support. See if you qualify to get Motif’s Maternity Compression Garments through insurance!

Motif Medical’s Pregnancy Support Band

Recommended from 3-9 months.

Stay active, comfortable, and supported! The Pregnancy Support Band works by lifting, supporting, and redistributing the weight of the baby. These adjustments relieve pregnancy-related pressure from the lower back, abdomen, hips and pelvis to reduce the aches and pains associated with body changes during pregnancy. The easy-to-use band is adjustable and also improves posture!

Motif Medical’s Compression Socks 

Recommended from 3-9 months.

Stay comfortable on your feet for longer periods of time and prevent swelling, circulation issues and varicose veins with Compression Socks. These socks provide increased blood flow through your ankles and legs to support your cardiovascular system with a controlled and gradual amount of pressure. Motif’s ultra-stretch fabric makes them easy to put on and stay in place with all-day comfort. And the cute designs guarantee these will not look or feel like your great auntie’s compression socks!

Motif Medical’s Recovery Support Garments 

Recommended for postpartum: (Natural & C-Section)

Motif Medical offers two options in their Recovery Support Garment: a Natural Birth Recovery Garment and a C-Section (and Natural) Birth Recovery Garment.

Once baby arrives, you’ve got enough to worry about. Heal and recover quicker after birth by stabilizing joints with Recovery Support Garments. These support garments reduce postpartum swelling, bleeding, aches and pains, while increasing mobility. Thanks to its tightening and toning, the garments also help shape and firm your belly, hips, waist, pelvis and lower back.

The C-Section Birth Recovery Garment also has a side zipper for easy, gentle wear, helping avoid irritation of the c-section incision.

Both garments are cleared and approved by the FDA for the treatment and prevention of postpartum-related issues and discomfort. 

Whatever stage of pregnancy you’re in, Motif is ready to lend some support. See if you qualify to get Motif’s Maternity Compression Garments through insurance!

 

We are all learning to live in the new normal these days, where items like gloves and face masks are part of our daily routine. With much of the population unable to find necessary items to keep them safe, many have stepped up to the challenge, including Quinn Callander.

As a young Canadian Scout, 12-year-old Quinn found out about a request from local hospitals to make “ear guards,” small items that attach to face masks and help alleviate pressure on the ears due to long-term wear. Not only did he rise to the challenge, making dozens on his 3D printers, his efforts have encouraged others to do the same.

Quinn’s mom shared a link to the 3D file used to make the ear guards, and since then the file has been downloaded over 66,500 times! In addition, the Facebook post where his efforts were originally documented has been shared more than 462,000 times.

Making the ear guards is a labor of love, taking four hours to make eight of them. Since March, Quinn has made over 500 before handing them off to a local Registered Nurse to be handed out to fellow health care workers.

––Karly Wood

 

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Another iconic brand is doing its part to alleviate the stress caused by COVID-19 closures and social distancing. LEGO has gone into their archives and assembled a team of designers, creative and play experts to come up with new ways to help families stay creative and connected. Daily play challenges, new play ideas and live build-a-longs will be shared on social media using the hashtag #letsbuildtogether and at www.lego.com/letsbuildtogether.

LEGO Lets Build Together

Play experts from the LEGO Foundation will also share ways to inspire learning through all types of play which will help children develop life-long skills such as critical thinking, creativity and problem solving while out of school.

LEGO _ Lets Build Together

The LEGO Foundation has also made a $50 million donation to provide vulnerable children with essential supplies and learning through play support. The donation will be split between three groups of partners: Education Cannot Wait, which provides education for children caught in emergencies and protracted crises; a selection of existing LEGO Foundation partners whose work with children and families is under additional pressure from COVID-19; and charity partners serving communities where the LEGO Group has a significant presence.

—Jennifer Swartvagher

All photos courtesy of LEGO

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Working parents have a lot on their minds between balancing work and family life. They often face the difficult choice between wanting to take on more at work and the disappointment at home when their job takes priority over family events. According to a new study by Bright Horizons, since they are fearful of career-impacting repercussions, they believe they still can’t be transparent about family responsibilities.

office

The report reveals that over half of working parents admit that they have needed to sneak out of work to take care of family commitments because they couldn’t be honest with their colleagues.

“We think as a society we are progressing in the workplace, but the data from the Modern Family Index tells a different story. It is clear that more progress is needed. Employers need to support working parents and create work environments in which all employees feel comfortable being honest and transparent about their family obligations,” says Bright Horizons Chief Human Resources Officer, Maribeth Bearfield. “There are some easy strategies employers can adopt to help alleviate stress, mental load, and burnout and improve workplace culture. Especially in a tight talent market, employers need to be doing as much as they can to attract and retain working parents.”

The study shows that employee burnout is at an all-time high. Employers may pay the price without a supportive work atmosphere that enables everyone to be successful in the workforce. According to the survey, employees will walk out the door if things don’t improve or they will risk facing burnout. 

Bearfield said, “The collective impact of being stretched thin at work while facing continued disappointment at home is forcing parents to leave their jobs in search of workplaces that are more in tune with modern priorities. It is time for all employers to focus attention on the needs of their workforce or risk being left behind in the war for talent.”

—Jennifer Swartvagher  

Featured photo: Photo by Ant Rozetsky on Unsplash

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Even if you’re not an animal lover, a new study published from Washington State University may have you changing your mind about adding a fur baby to the family. The study, which was published in AERA Open, an open-access journal, found that spending a small amount of time petting a dog or cat can help with stress reduction.

The university studied the common “Pet Your Stress Away” programs that many institutions are using, in which students can spend time with cats or dogs to alleviate stress. While the research specifically studied students, the results are much more far-reaching.

photo: Paul Hanoaka via Unsplash

Researchers studied 249 students split into four groups who were able to interact directly with animals, watch others interact, view a slide show or wait their turn. The results showed that the students who interacted directly with the pets showed much less cortisol in their saliva measurement (the tool used to determine cortisol levels) after the interaction.

The results were consistent for students with varying high and low levels of cortisol going into the study––proof that some time with your fuzzy friends is good for your health.

Patricia Pendry, an associate professor in WSU’s Department of Human Development states, “What we wanted to learn was whether this exposure would help students reduce their stress in a less subjective way. And it did, which is exciting because the reduction of stress hormones may, over time, have significant benefits for physical and mental health.”

Student or parent, a little time with your furry friend can only help when it comes to ditching the stress.

––Karly Wood

 

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