We need to talk. I know you’re going through some very important developmental milestones, but I have some concerns about your behavior that I feel we should address.
Last night, you whipped your diaper off with such force that a nugget of poo flew across the room and struck me in the chest. I’m not going to lie, that was upsetting, and I’m still not exactly sure how it even happened. I understand you want to do things “by yourself,“ but I have never flung my poo at you, so I think it’s fair to ask that that never happen again.
While we are on the topic of nonsense, what is with your insane tantrums? That can’t be normal. I think you may be suffering from PMS (Preschool Meltdown Syndrome). I’ve heard it’s a thing—I didn’t just make that up.
I know toddler life is full of disappointments and upsets, but you should know that it is completely unnecessary to fall to the ground—as though you’re composed entirely of jello—every time something doesn’t go your way.
I’m sorry I wouldn’t let you play in the oven. I know, I suck. Maybe when you’re older.
And, as much as I would enjoy the sabbatical from cooking, I can’t let you live off fruit snacks and giant hunks of cheese. If you did, you would never poop again, and then what would you throw at me? Think about that.
We also need to talk about your sleep. There is no need to switch out stuffed animals at 3 a.m. They don’t care who you’re sleeping with. They are stuffed and have no real feelings. I, on the other hand, do, and when you wake up and refuse to get back in bed at 3 a.m., what I feel most is anger.
Then there’s your pants—or lack thereof. Listen, I don’t like pants either, but unfortunately, they are required when we are in public. Going forward, I would like to cease all arguments about pants—it’s a non-negotiable topic. If we’re staying home, then, by all means, roam free, my little gazelle. I will be the first one in attendance at your no-pants-party.
Lastly, you know I’m not a stickler when it comes to screen time, but you are really pushing the limits of my sanity with your viewing preferences. Seventeen consecutive episodes of Paw Patrol is the definition of excessive. There isn’t anyone or anything left to save in Adventure Bay—those pups are just showboating at this point.
So, kid, we’ve got to make some changes. Maybe we can settle this over a game of Hungry, Hungry Hippos? I’ll let you be the blue one, then you can change your mind and demand the yellow one, only to ultimately play with the orange one.
Whatever we do, we need to do something. I love you, but I can’t peel you off one more floor or haul you out of another restaurant screaming and crying because your juice was too juicy.
Jorrie is a mother of two, who writes about the reality and insanity of parenting on her blog Close to Classy. She aspires to own furniture without stains and enjoy a shower without an audience. You can follow her antics on Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter.
My son was 10 when we relocated to a new city and state. And with that move came some new vocabulary as well.
Right away, child-of-mine picked up on the fact that his new classmates were saying, with some frequency, the word “crap,” a syllable I’d strictly forbidden from crossing his sassy little lips. And when he first heard a teacher shamelessly utter the expression, right there in front of her students, he decided we needed to have a little chit-chat on the subject.
Using his powers of persuasion and logic—which are both impressive and infuriating—he convinced me to let him try out this previously banned four-letter word. But I wasn’t thrilled about it—and he knew it.
And so it went. Naturally, he had a very hard time suppressing his newfound fascination with the pseudo-swear. “Crappity-crap-crap-crap!” Suddenly, I was cohabitating with a pint-sized, PG-rated sailor.
“That’s crap!”
“What the crap?”
“Holy crap!”
So we had to set some ground rules. Those three expressions above, yeah, they were nixed immediately. When I proposed he could try “what the heck” instead of “what the crap” or “holy moly” instead of “holy crap,” he guffawed at my old-lady ways, and I glimpsed the teenager he would most likely become. Whether I was uncool or not, he had no choice but to relent to the Mommy-in-Charge.
And so, thank goodness, he began to dial it back. “That’s crap!” transformed into “That’s junk!” (Sigh. Is that really any better?) And we came upon a consensus: No “crapping” in public or in front of family. And no excessive “crappity-crap-crapping” just because you have working vocal cords.
He knew this was a test of his maturity—possibly even a gateway to other privileges—and fortunately, treated it as such. In fact, he’s managed to find a palatable balance among all this crap, and he now only sparingly uses the once-controversial expression.
However, there was one unforeseen hiccup I should have seen coming a mile away. But nope. Oh no. I walked right into it. Just days after this new idiomatic freedom was bestowed upon my child, we had friends over for dinner. Gleefully, he announced to everyone in attendance: “My mom lets me say the C-word now!”
I'm a freelance writer with a background in journalism and corporate communications. My musings focus on living abroad, special needs, my puppy dog and everyday mom stuff. I live in the Midwestern USA with my husband, two sons and rescue mutt. For privacy,
LA has some of the best museums and botanical gardens in the world but here’s a little secret that most people don’t know—with a little planning, most of these world-class culture centers are accessible to us for free. Yep, you read that right—free to you and me, not just those under three. Check out the full list below and get ready to plan a year-full of free art, exhibits, exploration, and more.
Travel Town Museum: Open every day except Wed. (and Christmas Day), this always free-to-visit, outdoor train museum is a must for even non-rail fans. Fair warning: It does cost $3-$3.50 to ride the 16″ gauge miniature train (well worth it) so keep that in mind when your trainspotter sees kids chugging along the tracks, enjoying the ride. PS: Here are the best places to take your train-loving kid in LA.
Parking: Free.
FIDM Museum & Galleries: Founded in 1969, this always free museum collects, preserves, and interprets fashion objects and support materials with outstanding design merit. Recently closed due to the pandemic, FIDM is re-opening its doors Mar. 15—No advance tickets or reservations required. Open Tue.-Sun.
Parking: Parking is available for $5 (cash) in the lot located underneath the FIDM building; entrance is on 9th Street just before Grand Ave.
The Wende Museum: An art museum, historical archive of the Cold War, and center for creative community engagement that explores and inspires change, this gem is located in Culver City and is open Fri., Sat. and Sun.
Parking: Free parking is available in the city lots adjacent to the museum.
Fowler Museum at UCLA: Also known locally as just "The Fowler" this museum explores global arts and cultures with an emphasis on Africa, Asia, the Pacific, and the Indigenous Americas—from both the past and present. Open Wed.-Sun.
Parking: Pay-by-Plate parking is available near the museum, one-hour is $3, 1.5 hours is $4, and two hours is $6 with a maximum of $14 for the whole day.
The Broad Museum of Contemporary Art: Giant teacups, massive balloon animals, Alice in Wonderland-esque splashes of color and the Infinity Room will convince any kiddo that contemporary art is where it’s at.
Tickets:Advanced online reservations are required. Tickets are released on the last Wed. of each month at 10 a.m. for admission the following month.
Parking: Parking is available under the museum and cost $17 for 3 hours with museum validation, $5 for each additional 15 minutes, with a $27 daily maximum. There is a $17 flat rate after 5 p.m. on weeknights and all day on weekends. Bike parking is free and located on the P1 level.
California Science Center: Explore over 150 interactive exhibits including Ecosystems–a free permanent gallery featuring live animals, seven immersive exhibits, and a 188,000 gallon kelp tank. There is no room for boredom when you visit this California institution.
Tickets:Advanced, online reservations can be made but come with a $3, per person, service fee. Day of reservations can also be made on-site at the box office with no service fee, but availability and your preferred entry time are not guaranteed for in-person reservations.
Parking: Parking is available in Exposition Park and cost: $15. You can also take the Metro Expo Line to Expo Park/USC Station.
Cayton Children's Museum: Located in Downtown Santa Monica just blocks from the Pacific Ocean, the Cayton Children’s Museum offers 21,000 square feet of discovery-based exhibits and immersive play.
Parking: Parking is available in Structures 7 and 8, owned and operated by the City of Santa Monica, which are immediately adjacent to Santa Monica Place. The first 90 minutes are free, with a fee after that.
The Getty Center: The J. Paul Getty Trust is the world's largest cultural and philanthropic organization dedicated to the visual arts, you can discover art from ancient Greece and Italy, Europe from the Middle Ages to the early 1900s, and global photography from its invention to now. Closed Mon., it is by far one of our favorite places to hang in LA, both inside with artwork or outside in the garden.
Parking: Parking is $20 per car but the good news is, you can get same-day parking at both the Getty Center and the Getty Villa Museum (also free admission) for one fee. To do so, make reservations for both sites on the same date. (Please note that driving between the Center and the Villa usually takes 20–45 minutes, depending on traffic.) At the first site you visit, go to the Museum Information Desk and ask for a coupon for same-day parking at the other site. After staff verify your reservation, you will receive a coupon. Not valid on Mon. & Tue.
Museum of Modern Art (MOCA): Established in 1979, this artist-founded museum in Los Angeles with two distinct venues—MOCA Grand Avenue and The Geffen Contemporary at MOCA—is dedicated to collecting and exhibiting contemporary art. Housing one of the most compelling collections of contemporary art in the world, comprising roughly 7000 objects, MOCA is continually showcases ground-breaking, historically-significant exhibitions.
Tickets: Advance ticket reservations are required. Tickets are released every two weeks on Tues. at noon.
Parking: Parking rates vary by location, both locations are accessible via the Metro.
LA Museums with Free Admission Days
Skirball Cultural Center: There are so many innovative exhibitions on display throughout the center, the kids; however, will no doubt gravitate toward Noah's Ark, a completely unique and award-winning installment featuring a floor-to-ceiling wooden ark where little dreamers can imagine themselves inside the pages of a storybook. Taking up an 8,000 square foot gallery, this exhibit is filled with art, puppets and whimsical animals encouraging kids to play, climb and build.
Parking: During normal business hours, parking is free and open to Skirball visitors only. At this time, visitors must park in the Skirball’s North Parking garage, located underground on the north end of the Skirball's main driveway.
Kidspace Children's Museum: As one of the crown jewels in the hearts and minds of many little locals, this favorite spot in Pasadena inspires little ones to channel their inner scientist by exploring the Galvin Physics Forest, climb to new heights in the Arroyo Adventure, watch caterpillar chrysalises take shape at the Nature Exchange, and create to their heart's content in the Imagination Workshop. Be still our beating butterfly wings!
Free Museum Days: Admission is free on the first Fri. of every month. Advance reservations are required and are released two weeks prior to the date of visit.
Parking: Free parking is available in Rose Bowl Lot I near the Jackie Robinson Baseball Field and the Rose Bowl Aquatics Center.
Natural History Museum: Antarctic dinosaurs? Rare and priceless gemstones? More mammals on display than you can shake a tail at? Yes please! Kids (and parents for that matter) will beg to visit to the Natural History Museum. From Dinosaur Hall and the hands-on Discovery Center to the African Mammal Dioramas and Nature Gardens outside, this museum is sure to peak your bitty botanists interest and then some. If all this interactive learning has your brood a little hangry, stop by the NHMLA Grill which offers plenty of kid-friendly dishes to please even the pickiest palette.
Free Museum Days: L.A. County residents receive free Museum Admission 3-5 p.m. Mon. through Fri. Closed the first Tues. of every month (plus Independence Day, Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Year's Day). Additional tickets must be purchased to see special exhibitions, Butterfly and Spider Pavilion, 3D Theater, and other special ticketed experiences.
Parking: $15 flat rate in the NHM Car Park, located on Bill Robertson Lane, just south of Exposition Blvd. You can also take the LA Metro Expo Line to visit—the closest stations to NHM are the Expo/USC and Expo/Vermont stations.
La Brea Tar Pits Museum: Make no bones about it, the La Brea Tar Pits Museum is one of the most unique and exciting places to visit for paleontologists of all ages! There’s so much for elementary excavators to see and explore. Kiddos can check out over one million ice age fossils from 650 different species and they’ll really dig the Fossil Lab where they get to watch real live paleontologists clean, study and prep fossils for exhibit. After your visit, the grounds around the Tar Pits outside are a perfect place to picnic (and maybe even roll down the giant hill once or twice).
Free Museum Days: L.A. County residents receive free Museum Admission 3-5 p.m. Mon. through Fri. Additional tickets must be purchased for the 3D Theater.
Parking: For $15, you can park in the museum's parking lot, located at the corner of Curson Ave. and 6th St., directly behind the museum. Enter from the western side of Curson Avenue.
The Autry Museum of the American West: Saddle up your lil cowpokes for a free taste of the American West at the Autry Museum on the second Tues. of every month. During your visit, youngins will learn about everything from Native American history and culture to the California gold rush and westward expansion. For the more hands-on buckaroos, they can create their own Western shows with props and costumes, pose for precious photo ops on a pretend horse, take part in themed scavenger hunts and wander through the expansive outdoor garden. Got a hungry pack? Round up your posse for some vittles at the Crossroads West Café where the kids menu will surely satisfy!
Descanso Gardens: Free admission on the third Tues. of each month and are released, online, the first day of each month (unless it falls on a weekend, then they'll be released that following Mon.). Check out our guide on what to do and see at Descanso Gardens.
LA Aboretum: Free tickets are available for the third Tue. of each month. Limited and timed, tickets must be reserved in advance online and are released on the first of each month unless the first falls on a weekend, in this case, tickets are released on the first Mon. of the month at 9:00 a.m.. Tickets are available on a first-come, first-served basis. Parking is free.
South Coast Botanic Garden: The third Tues. of each month is free to all visitors. Tickets are required and can be reserved online.
Conejo Valley Botanic Garden: This always free-to-enter 33-acres garden in Thousand Oaks has sweeping vistas, fifteen unique, hillside specialty gardens and hiking trails.
No one was more excited to get the news that California can start the process of reopening theme parks than residents themselves––except maybe theme park enthusiasts! Disneyland, Six Flags, LEGOLAND, Knott’s Berry Farm, Universal Studios and more have all been closed since last March but new guidelines will soon allow the parks to reopen.
First things first, there are a few things you need to know. California currently utilizes a color-coded, tiered system that places counties into varying levels of “openness” based on Covid-19 case rates. Only parks in counties that are in the red, orange and yellow tiers will be able to open.
photo: Christian Thompson via Disneyland Resort
That means that all parks in the purple tier, where the virus is still considered “widespread” will not be eligible for reopening. Once the county moves to the red tier, amusement parks are eligible to open starting Apr. 1.
While in the red tier, parks can operate at a limited 15 percent capacity. Once they move to the orange tier, they can increase to 25 percent, and 35 percent once in the yellow tier.
Now for the potentially bad news: for now, attendance is limited only to in-state visitors. That means, don’t start planning that big Disney trip to California just yet!
But keep that chin up. Currently California has administered over 10 million vaccine doses so that yellow tier is closer than ever!
If you haven’t yet heard about the fiver birthday party trend, it could change the way you plan parties from now on—and we bet your guests will love it, too.
The “fiver party” is a simple solution for both attendees and hosts when it comes to the big birthday gift dilemma. Instead of gifts, guests are simply asked to bring five dollars for the birthday kid. With a dozen or more kids in attendance, those “fivers” will quickly add up to a decent sum that can be used toward one big gift.
It’s a win-win for parents and guests, as you’ll eliminate that stack of presents that will barely fit in your overflowing playroom. Plus, guests can save money and skip the hassle of having to shop. The only downside is that young kids might miss the fun and excitement of unwrapping gifts or choosing a special present for their friend. At the end of the day, though, the birthday boy or girl will be able to use the money for something they will truly want and cherish.
If you’d like to throw your own fiver party, make sure you discuss the plan in advance with your kid so they can get excited about what they plan to spend their special birthday money on. And remember, it doesn’t have to be a toy. It can go toward an experience or become a donation to an important charity of the kid’s choosing. Make it clear in the invitation what a “fiver party” means—while it is a growing trend, some parents might not be in the loop.
“We’re trying to help [NAME] focus on the joy of celebrating this special occasion with his cherished friends rather than on receiving gifts.
To that end, we hope you’ll consider NO GIFTS. For those who feel uncomfortable with that, we ask you consider NO MORE THAN a $5 gift card or cash that he can put towards something special he’s saving for. Thanks for understanding and celebrating with us.”
Hopefully, we’ll see this birthday trend take off even more in 2023.
Walt Disney World fans rejoice! As the phased reopening of the resort continues guests will be happy to know that the Park Hopper option will be returning in the new year. According to the Disney Blog, starting Jan. 1, 2021, guests who purchased a ticket or annual pass with Park Hopper benefits will be able to visit more than one park per day, with a few modifications.
Guests must make a Disney Park Pass reservation for the first park they plan to visit and enter that park first prior to visiting another. Currently a park reservation is not required after the first park, however reservation requirements are subject to change.
The resort will set specific Park Hopper hours during which this option will be available. Park Hopper hours will begin at 2 p.m. each day and end at the park’s scheduled close time. Guests will soon be able to check DisneyWorld.com/ParkHours and the My Disney Experience app for the most up-to-date Park Hopper hours, as they could start earlier at a later date, depending on the day and park. The ability to visit another park will be subject to the park’s capacity limitations.
These modifications are designed to help the resort to continue managing attendance in a way that fosters physical distancing. Additionally, other enhanced health and safety measures remain in effect. Face coverings are required for all guests ages two and up.
If you have any questions, visit the Know Before You Go page on DisneyWorld.com, call the Disney Reservation Center, contact your travel professional or reach out to planDisney to get helpful tips and information on your upcoming Disney vacation.
New Jersey’s American Dream is set to reopen following Governor Murphy’s recent announcement. Guests are invited to visit the acclaimed indoor entertainment experiences including Nickelodeon Universe, DreamWorks Water Park, Out Of This World Blacklight Mini Golf and The Rink beginning Oct. 1. Retailers will also be opening at American Dream for the first time, including ZARA, H&M, Primark and more.
To ensure the safety of guests, reduced attendance levels and extensive health and safety protocols will be observed by all attractions and retailers.
A few things guests can expect upon their return to American Dream include, but are not limited to:
Face coverings required for entry into American dream
Reduced capacities throughout American Dream and within each of the open attractions
Increased sanitizing and disinfecting throughout American Dream common areas and attractions
Hand sanitizer stations and hygiene reminders installed throughout American Dream and within the attractions
Physical distancing guidance, including ground markings, plexiglass barriers, touchless programming and more.
Even though the beginning of this school year looks different than years past, kids are still looking forward to meeting new teachers and classmates. Even if this year consists of remote or hybrid learning there is the excitement that comes with buying new clothes, shoes and supplies. Nordstrom is proud to continue its partnership with customers and the nonprofit Shoes That Fit for the tenth year in a row to provide brand-new and well-fitting sneakers to kids in need in local communities.
Starting today and through Oct. 4, customers can purchase $10 giving cards in all Nordstrom stores or donate online. One hundred percent of proceeds from every giving card purchased goes toward the gift of one pair of new sneakers for a child in need. Individuals can also make an online, tax-deductible donation at www.shoesthatfit.org/Nordstrom.
“At Nordstrom, we are committed to making a difference in our communities,” said Scott Meden, chief marketing officer at Nordstrom. “Each pair of shoes donated represents a child with more confidence, hope, self-esteem and joy. We are thankful to our customers and employees who have helped us give more than 200,000 pairs of shoes to kids in need over the last 10 years.”
Since 2010, together with its customers, Nordstrom has raised nearly $4 million to give 200,000 kids in need a brand-new pair of shoes. These shoes have been delivered at schools across the United States, all of which have a high percentage of students on free or reduced lunch programs. When children receive their new shoes through the Shoes That Fit program, schools shared that 40% of those students increased attendance and 87% reported increased self-esteem.
“For children to reach their full potential, they need to feel good about themselves. Creating this confidence in children at a young age is empowering and critical to their future success,” said Amy Fass, CEO of Shoes That Fit. “We are proud to partner with Nordstrom to give back to these children and invest in their future.”
This year, Nordstrom has also enlisted the help of Olympic gold-medalist Gabby Douglas to encourage people to help the retailer donate over 35,000 shoes to kids in need.
Beyond the partnership with Shoes That Fit, Nordstrom supports the local communities where it does business. In 2019, the company donated nearly $11 million to 392 organizations in every community where Nordstrom does business. Many of these organizations provide basic necessities to kids and families so they can thrive and reach their full potential.
The magic is happening at Walt Disney World, but starting in September your visits may be cut a little short. The theme parks announced this past weekend that hours will be reduced beginning Sept. 8.
Magic Kingdom, Hollywood Studios Epcot and Animal Kingdom will all be losing an hour or two every day in light of the recent drop in attendance attributed to the pandemic.
If your kids are itching to get in the kitchen have them join Rachael Ray and her celebrity chef friends for a free interactive, online cooking camp. The camp will offer your entire family the opportunity to learn important and fun cooking skills, as well as recipes you can make at home.
Camp will run daily from Thurs., Jul. 30 through Fri., Aug. 14 and will take place at 2 p.m. ET/11 a.m. PT on Zoom. There will be a total of 16 camp sessions which will last about 45 minutes each.
The target age group for campers is 8 to 15 years old, but everyone is welcome to join. Parents are encouraged to participate with their kids to help produce the recipes and ensure kitchen safety.
Attendance to the camp will be free and will only require on-line registration to receive the Zoom conference instructions and details for that day’s camp session.
View the class list, and be sure to check back for more classes being added every day. Limited spots are available so reserve your virtual seat today.
Proceeds from sponsorships and optional online donations will be split between two incredible organizations both of which provide support for youth development and empowerment: Boys & Girls Clubs of America and the Rachael Ray Yum-o! scholarship for students to attend Florida International University’s Chaplin School of Hospitality & Tourism Management.
