Got a little comedian in your household? These Valentine’s Day jokes for kids are sure to crack a smile sweeter than any chocolate. Let the kids memorize a few to share with friends, or write them on a note for V-Day lunches. Either way, you’re sure to get a laugh, a hug, and probably at least one eye roll. If your kiddo needs more joke material to work with, try out our other jokes for kids. If you’re looking for other Valentine’s Day fun for kids, check out these DIY gifts they can make for friends or loved ones, and Valentine’s Day-themed food and treats they’ll love.

Valentine's Day Jokes for Kids
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1. What do you call the world's smallest Valentine’s Day card?
A valen-teeny.

2. What did the stamp say to the envelope on Valentine’s Day?
I’m stuck on you!

3. What did one volcano say to the other?
I lava you!

4. What did the cucumber say to the pickle?
You mean a great dill to me.

5. How did the phone propose to his GF?
He gave her a ring.

6. What did the one sheep say to the other?
I love ewe!

7. And how did the other sheep respond?
You’re not so baaaaaa-d yourself.

8. What did the farmer give his wife for Valentine’s Day?
Hogs and kisses.

cute kids with paper hearts smiling at Valentine's Day jokes for kids
iStock

9. And what did the tweenager give his mom? 
Ughs and kisses!

10. What did one light bulb say to the other light bulb on Valentine’s Day?
I wuv you watts and watts!

11. What do you say to an octopus on Valentine’s Day?
I want to hold your hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand!

12. What do you call a ghost’s true love?
Their ghoul-friend.

13. What do you write in a slug’s Valentine’s Day card?
Be my Valen-slime!

14. Knock Knock
Who's there?
Luke
Luke who?
Luke who got a Valentine!

15. Why is Valentine’s Day a good day for a party?
Because you can really party hearty!

16. What kind of flowers should you NOT give on Valentine’s Day?
Cauliflowers!

17. What do owls say to declare their love?
Owl be yours!

18. What did one bee say to the other? 
I love bee-ing with you, honey!

Valentine's Day Jokes for Kids
Obi Onyeador via Unsplash

19. Knock Knock
Who's there?
Olive
Olive who?
Olive you!

20. Why do skunks love Valentine’s Day?
They are very scent-imental creatures.

21. What’s the best part about Valentine’s Day?
The day after when all the candy is on sale.

22. What did the painter say to her sweetheart?
I love you with all my art.

23. What did Robin Hood say to his girlfriend?
Sherwood like to be your valentine.

24. Why did the sheriff lock up her boyfriend?
He stole her heart.

25. What do you call two birds in love?
Tweethearts!

26. What shade of red is your heart?
Beat red! 

27. What did one cat say to the other cat on Valentine's Day?
Don't ever change, you're purrrfect.

28. Why would you want to marry a goalie?
Because he (or she) is a real keeper!

Valentine's Day Jokes for Kids
iStock

29. What type of shape is most popular on Valentine's Day?
Acute triangle. 

30. Have you got a date for Valentine's Day?
Yeah, it's February 14th. 

31. What did Frankenstein's monster say to his bride on Valentine's Day?
Be my Valenstein! 

32. What flowers get the most kisses on Valentine's Day?
Tulips (two-lips). 

33. Who always has a date on Valentine's Day?
A calendar. 

34. Knock knock! 
Who's there?
Atlas!
Atlas who?
Atlas, it's Valentine's Day! 

35. What kind of candy is never on time?
Choco-LATE.

36. Why was the rabbit happy?
Because somebunny loved him!

—Joshua Y., age 9

37. Why don't you ever date a tennis player?
Because love means nothing to them.

—Joshua N. 

38. What do girl snakes write at the bottom of their letters?
With love and hisses.

 

Valentine's Day Jokes for Kids
iStock

39. What did one squirrel say to the other squirrel on Valentine's Day? 
I'm nuts about you!

40. What did the raspberry say to his valentine? 
I love you berry much. 

41. What's the most romantic utensil? 
A fork because it has Valen-tines. 

42. What Valentine's message was on the honeycomb?
Bee mine.

43. What did one oar say to another? 
"Can I interest you in a little row-mance?" 

44. What are artichokes known for? 
Their hearts. 

45. On Valentine's Day, what did the calculator say to the pencil? 
"You can count on me."

46. What kind of candy is always late on Valentine's Day? 

Choco-LATE

47. What does a Jedi Master say on Valentine's Day?

Yoda one for me.

48. What did the magnet say to the paperclip?

I find you very attractive. 

49. What did the scientist say to their sweetheart?

"You must be made out of oxygen and neon because you are the ONe"

TikTok is useful. It taught us how to clean our cookie sheets, make no-bake cheesecake, and now — eat like Jennifer Aniston.

If you’re a Friends superfan, you may have already heard the tales of the actress eating the same salad for lunch every, single day they filmed. Courtney Cox has mentioned it in interviews, and through the years, the recipe has changed just a bit. But recently, the recipe went viral on Instagram and TikTok, along with a super easy-to-follow recipe.

 

 

View this post on Instagram

 

A post shared by Eating Healthy (@eatinghealthyfeed)

Here’s the recipe:

3.5 cups cooked bulgur wheat ( I made 1 cup uncooked )
2-3 chopped mini cucumber
1/2 cup chopped parsley
1/2 cup chopped mint
1/3 cup chopped red onion
1/2 cup chopped pistachios
2 cups chickpeas
Juice of 1 lemon
1/4 cup extra virgin olive oil
Salt & pepper
1/2 cup crumbled feta

Yes, it’s really this easy. You just dump all of this in a bowl, douse it with olive oil and lemon, mix it up, and enjoy! We had to try it to see if it was really worth eating every day. The verdict? Yes. It’s delicious!

Maria Guido

As busy parents, one of the easiest things you can do for self-care is mix up a batch of something that you can easily eat for lunch for a few days. How many times do you get to 5 p.m. and realize you’ve eaten nothing? Yeah, us too. Try it! You can find the bulgar wheat in the organic section of your local supermarket—or where they keep the bagged grains.

Photo: Sugar Proof Kids

 

Ready for some new ideas for snacks for your kids? It can be easy to get into a rut, and unfortunately, most of the snacks marketed to kids aren’t the healthiest. In fact, 80% of kids’ snacks and products have added sugar and most have deceptive claims on the packaging. They may say “whole grain” or “made with fruit” or “rich in calcium,” making parents think they are getting something with added nutritional value, whereas many of these are highly processed and full of hidden sugars or sweeteners and other unwanted ingredients such as refined seed oils or artificial colors. These include many brands of granola bars, crackers, chips, yogurts, and fruit snacks.

The sugar in these products adds up fast, and just one or two seemingly healthy products can put kids over their suggested daily limit for added sugar. For example, one granola bar can easily have 12 grams or three teaspoons of added sugar, which is half of the general daily maximum recommended for children ages 2-18. And most kids do not feel as if they have been given dessert if they have a granola bar, but essentially that is what many brands are!

An overly sweet diet can impact children from head to toe and cause risk for many health issues, including those that develop slowly and silently over time, such as non-alcoholic fatty liver disease, systemic inflammation, and eventual cognitive decline. In the short term, kids who have more sugar are more likely to struggle to concentrate and to be moodier and more fatigued. Reducing sugar in daily snacks can make a big difference in children’s overall health.

Easy Snacks to Make at Home

Involving kids in preparing easy snacks is a great way to encourage them to accept new, healthy options. Here are a few ideas:

1. Cucumber slices with Japanese Furikake Seasoning: Washing a cucumber and helping to slice it into rounds is something that even toddlers can assist with. We love to dip cucumber in Japanese Furikake seasoning, which is a mix of seaweed flakes, sesame seeds, and sea salt. Look for a brand that does not have added sugar or MSG in it. Kids love this because it gives the cucumber a great crunch and added flavor.

2. Watermelon Pops: Another very easy idea is to cut a watermelon into rectangular pieces, retaining the rind on to use as a handle, and freeze it on parchment paper into one-ingredient ice pops. While kids may be too young to cut the watermelon safely, they can help arrange it on the parchment for freezing. These are so refreshing and fun to eat on a hot day.

3. No-Bake Chocolate Sesame Squares: For something sweet, that is also plant-based and high fiber, try these treats out. They are full of chocolatey flavor and, in addition to being free from added sugar, they also happen to be gluten-free and dairy-free for anyone with those needs. This is a very easy recipe (here are the full details) where you just put everything in a food processor and then flatten it into a baking dish. Even young kids can help measure the ingredients, add them to the processor, operate it with adult supervision, and help press the mix into the dish.

3. Crispy Chickpea Snacks: These seasoned, roasted chickpeas are flavorful and a great alternative to chips or crackers. They are high in fiber, keep kids satisfied, and are also easy to make and affordable. You can modify the seasonings based on what your family likes. We especially love the garam masala version, and the Italian version with rosemary and oregano is also amazing. Kids can help drain the canned chickpeas, dry them with a dish towel, baste them with olive oil, and sprinkle them with the spices before roasting.

Healthier Options for Snacks You Can Buy

We know that making your own snacks isn’t always possible, and it’s helpful to know which ready-made products you can rely on that use good ingredients and your kids will like.

For non-perishable options, here are some products we like:

With these ideas, you can keep up with your children’s snack appetites, involve them in the kitchen, and keep them healthier at the same time.

Dr. Michael Goran, Ph.D. and Dr. Emily Ventura, Ph.D. are co-authors of the pioneering new book, SUGARPROOF: The Hidden Dangers of Sugar That Are Putting Your Child’s Health at Risk and What You Can Do (Avery/Penguin Random House). To purchase the book and for more ideas and recipes, check out the website and our Instagram page.

Dr. Michael Goran PhD Dr. Emily Ventura PhD, MPH
Tinybeans Voices Contributor

Dr. Michael Goran, Ph.D. and Dr. Emily Ventura, Ph.D. are co-authors of pioneering new book, SUGARPROOF: The Hidden Dangers of Sugar That Are Putting Your Child’s Health at Risk and What You Can Do (Avery/Penguin Random House). To purchase the book or for more information, visit www.sugarproofkids.com

National Eat Your Vegetable Day is June 17 and broccoli is the most popular veggie in the U.S., according to a new survey from Green Giant. Believe it or not, every person who picked it said the taste was the top factor!

Regionally there are some disagreements. The East Coast prefers broccoli, but the West Coast leans in favor of carrots. Unsurprisingly, corn is the king of many Midwest states. But every state picked one of those three vegetables as the best, pushing aside past favorites that included tomatoes and cucumber.

Also unsurprisingly, small children were not included in this survey. Green Giant collected data from more than 5,000 Americans over the age of 18. There would likely be even more disagreement among kids and we predict that green smoothies would be a top contender.

Thankfully Green Giant has an array of options for the veggie-averse members of your family. Cauliflower pizza crust, riced veggies, veggie tots and spirals, all frozen for easy side options! Feel free to conduct your own informal survey with your family—with a side of broccoli of course—to mark this week’s holiday.

––Sarah Shebek

Featured image courtesy of Green Giant

 

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Getting kids involved in growing their own fruits and vegetables is one of the best ways to also get them to EAT those fruits and vegetables! But convincing kids that gardening isn’t just a chore you’re forcing them to do is another challenge entirely. One of the key strategies you can use to get kids excited about growing their own produce is choosing ones that will capture their attention.

There are four criteria you can use to help your kids choose fruits and vegetables that get them excited:

1. Quick Reward: Focus on produce that grow fairly quickly and will be ready to pick sooner rather than later
2. Kid-Friendly Picking: Focus on food that kids can pick and eat right off the plant, without too much work
3. Yummy Flavor: Choose fruits and veggies that your kids actually like to eat, or might learn to enjoy without too much fuss
4. Unique or Unusual Appearances: Choose produce that look so freaky or funny your kids can’t help but be curious

Another key to choosing which plant to grow—let them be a part of it! The more ownership your child feels over the process of picking and planting produce, the more likely they are to get invested. This is where resisting the urge to correct them or steer their decisions is going to be key. Give them some guidelines about how much space they have, how many plants will fit, and how much money they are allowed to spend. If it helps, give them some choices based on our guidance by telling them a bit about their options.

Great Produce Choices for Kids:

Cucumbers: First, cucumber seeds are recognizable right away because they look exactly like, well, cucumber seeds. Your kid will get a kick out of the fact that they recognize these seeds from when they are eating cucumbers. In addition, cucumbers are one of the fastest seeds to sprout, and they come up with determination. I am always pleasantly surprised to plant cucumbers and come back to seedlings popping up within just a few days. And lastly, cucumbers are often a favorite in kids’ vegetable choices. Consider a small snacking variety that will be ready sooner, and allows your kids to simply pick them off the vine and eat them like apples. They’ll feel like they’re doing something sneaky!  

Cherry Tomatoes: There is no better vegetable to grow for snacking right off the vine than cherry tomatoes. The fun thing about this veggie is that they come in way more varieties than you’ll see at a grocery store. And, if you buy a cherry tomato seedling it will be one of the first tomato plants to produce edible fruit. Try a fun sweet variety like Sungold, or go for something dramatic like black cherry. Allow kids to plan their own cherry tomato, choose a cage to support it, and—when ready—eat to their heart’s content without making them collect or save them.  

Watermelon: A little bit harder to grow because they need more space, watermelon is still a fun option to try because it makes for a more dramatic result. For quicker satisfaction go for a mini watermelon variety that will be ready a bit sooner, and buy a nice healthy start so that they aren’t waiting for something to start from seed. For best results, look for something seedless or with minimal seeds so that kids aren’t frustrated with seedy flesh. For something a bit more fun and unusual, go for the cucamelon—a fruit that looks like a tiny watermelon and tastes like a cucumber with a hint of lime. They’re tiny bite-sized fruit that kids can pop in their mouths and enjoy while walking through the garden.  

Yard Long Beans: In the category of fun and unusual nothing quite beats the yard-long green bean. They grow on vines that will crawl up a trellis and, when ready, can be up to 12 inches long. Cook them without cutting them so kids can eat them with their fingers and have a little playtime at the dinner table! For added fun, plant any type of green bean on a vertical bean tower—you can literally grow the walls of a fort for the kids to play in!  

Decorative Gourds: Another fun one in the looks category are decorative gourds. Basically, like a little pumpkin or squash that has all sorts of bumps and warts, these gourds aren’t usually edible but they are a fun addition to the garden and can be used to decorate at Halloween or Thanksgiving. There are a ton of varieties, or mixed blends of seeds to add diversity to the results.

No matter what you grow, the important thing is to give your child a section of the garden, let them make some choices and gently guide them toward success. Remind them to water and weed when needed so that they don’t lose their veggies entirely, but try not to do it for them.

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Carrie Williams Howe
Tinybeans Voices Contributor

Carrie Williams Howe is the Executive Director of an educational non-profit by day, and parent, writer, and aspiring homesteader by night and weekend. She lives in Williston, VT with her husband, two young children, and a rambunctious border collie. Carrie writes about family, food, parenting, and homesteading.

Gardening became a hit hobby during last year’s pandemic and the momentum has carried forward into 2021. But did you know that only half of home gardeners use all the food that they grow, according to a new survey from Bonnie Plants? The Grow More. Feed More. initiative is aiming to change that and tackle food insecurity in the process.

Bonnie Plants has partnered with AmpleHarvest.org, a non-profit that connects gardeners with food pantries based on their zip code. Together, they hope to encourage home gardeners to donate their surplus and help feed neighbors in need. Bonnie Plants will also donate 5 percent of their online sales through July to AmpleHarvest.org and committed $200,000 to help fight hunger.

“Many people don’t realize that you can donate the extra food from your garden directly to local food pantries,” said Mike Sutterer, Bonnie Plants President and CEO. “Most gardeners end up with extra zucchini, cucumber, tomatoes that they don’t know what to do with, and if all of these gardeners donated just a bag or two of vegetables, we could make a significant impact on food insecurity nationwide.”

Your plants are probably still in the seedling phase, but you can plan ahead for your donation once harvest approaches. Visit the AmpleHarvest website to find a food pantry in your area and get started. It’s an easy way for green thumbs to give back!

––Sarah Shebek

Video courtesy of Bonnie Plants/Feature photo: Filip Urban via Unsplash

 

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The cutest charcuterie board in all the land is here for your May the Fourth festivities! Hormel brainstormed a delectable spread full of the cutest Star Wars-themed treats, and we’ve got the scoop on how to pull it off.

Read on for recipes!

May the Fourth Board

  • For the Yoda eggs, combine guacamole with hard-cooked egg yolks and pipe into egg whites. Finish with baby cucumber slices and cut up raisins.
  • To make your light sabers, melt one cup of white chocolate chips and ½ cup of Skippy creamy peanut butter. Dip pretzel rods into the mixture, decorate with sprinkles and let dry in the fridge!
  • Chewbacca toasts! Spread Skippy creamy peanut butter on toast from a round loaf. Pipe chocolate icing on toast and finish with cut up mini marshmallows.
  • For the pizzas with “craters,” buy mini pizzas or make your own with English muffins, shredded cheese and Hormel pepperoni!
  • To create mini TIE fighters, make a cheese and cracker sandwich with a firm cheese, and hold together with a bit of cream cheese
  • Add some stars by using a cookie cutter for firmer lunchmeat (ham, salami, and pepperoni)
  • Your board wouldn’t be complete without a Star Destroyer. Spread peanut butter on a rice cake and add a mini popped rice cake as a super laser
  • For your blue milk, add a spot of food coloring to regular milk, or create a coconut milk smoothie with blueberries for a natural hue.

May 4 is also known as Star Wars Day, celebrating the beloved franchise from George Lucas. Fans picked the date to make a pun on the catchphrase “May the Force Be With You.”

Whether you settle in for an epic evening watching the original trilogy or host a gathering at your rebel base, make this board a part of your plans. Do or do not, there is no try!

—Sarah Shebek

Featured image courtesy of Hormel 

 

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Lunch boxes coming back home full can create a lot of frustration and frictions at home, especially if you are the parent of a child who doesn’t enjoy a wide array of food. The good news is that there are easy strategies that you can use to encourage kids to eat their school lunch.

Mathilde Cerioli, Positive Discipline Educator for Little Dragon, has 4 easy steps to teaching our kids how to be responsible for their lunchbox. This is an efficient first step towards a healthier relationship with their lunch. Read them all, and don’t forget to download your FREE printable before your leave!

1. Put the Kids in Charge of Their Lunchbox. Encourage your child to carry their lunchbox to and back from school. Whether you’re taking the car or walking to school, their lunchbox can be their responsibility. They can start doing so at a really young age, it will help them take some responsibility for their lunch. As they get older, you can also encourage them to empty their lunch bag and wash their containers (or place them in the dishwasher) when they get home.

2. Involve Children in Making the Menu. The first step to teach your child how to make their own lunch is to talk with them about what constitutes a proper lunch. You can introduce them to the different foods they will need and give them options to choose from. By giving choices, it is not up to them whether or not they get vegetables for instance, but they get to decide between carrots or cucumber, broccoli, or peas. You can also plan a trip to the grocery store and let them pick a new fruit or veggie they are ready to try. See useful resources below to help you start the conversation.

Remember, the main goal of lunch is that they get the fuel they need to learn, focus, and stay active all day. So, if you have a broccoli hater on your hands, the lunchbox is probably not the right place to convince them to try some. Prefer a moment during the week when they will be more relaxed and will have more time to make new experiments.

3. Teach Them How to Prepare Their Lunch. Did you notice how easier it is to throw away leftover pizzas you ordered, rather than food you spent 45 minutes cooking? That’s because you know the energy that went into making it. So, why not make the kids take part in the process the same way?

Children can start being involved in making their lunchbox early on. Younger children can help put the food in the container, while older ones can start peeling and cutting food. It is more time consuming to cook with children, so it does not have to be something you do every day. But, you could decide together on a day when children help. However, do not expect your child to know how to do things, use a positive parenting tool ‘Climb the Ladder’ to do so! First, you start doing it and they watch, then you do it together, then they can do it by themselves. This will take several days for some skills.

4. Ask Them about Their Lunchtime. Invite problem-solving when the lunchbox comes home mostly untouched. Children might not eat as well for many different reasons, some they might have not even identified themselves yet. Is lunch too long to eat and they don’t get enough time to play? Do they have a wiggly tooth and carrots are too hard to eat? Is there a food item in their friend’s lunchbox that they would like to try? Then, talk with them about how to change whatever is keeping them from eating. Maybe pack something more nutritious that is faster to eat? Maybe cut the carrots a different shape so they are not bothered by their wiggly tooth?

Resources to Help You Get Started:

Lunchbox Packing Tips: 5 Basics you need to know before you get started with lunch packing.

Teaching Kids: 4 Easy steps to teaching your child to be responsible for their lunchbox.

Get inspired. Visit Teuko.com and see what other kids actually eat.

This post originally appeared on Teuko Blog.

Teuko is the first platform that empowers families to simplify lunch packing. Using Teuko, they can find and share kid-approved lunchbox ideas, recipes, and tips, all in one place. Teuko is transforming the lunch packing experience by boosting inspiration and motivation week after week. 

A study conducted in late 2020 revealed that Americans spend an average of 23 hours and 36 minutes on cleaning and housework each month—and as moms, we think that number is conservative (raise your hand if your post-bedtime routine is spent doing dishes and picking up toys). While cleaning may never truly go away, Hello Bello is trying to make cleaning and tidying up just a tad bit more…dare we say…enjoyable. They just released a brand-new plant-based cleaning line whose vibrant packaging, environmentally-friendly design and pleasant scents will hopefully make cleaning feel like less of a chore. Read on for all the details.

Hello Bello’s plant-based cleaning line includes three products: a Glass Cleaner, Multi-Surface Cleaner and Wood and Floor Cleaner. You’ll love that each product comes in a reusable bottle and interchangeable scent pods. When you’re ready to clean (or you’ve run out of solution), simply add water to the reusable bottle, load your scented pod and shake. And, you’re good to go!

The entire line is plant-based and made without synthetic fragrances or dyes, bleach, ammonia, MIT & BIT, gluten or phosphate. Plus, Hello Bello’s reusable bottles results in a 90% smaller carbon footprint and 80% plastic use reduction.

The 3-Pack Cleaning Starter Kit is available in lemongrass sage and cucumber scenes and retails for $24.98. If you’re already a Hello Bello subscriber, the starter kit can be added to existing or new diaper bundles.

Online at hellobello.com

—Erin Lem

photos: Hello Bello

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