ML Interest Tag: direction

3 Ways Mountain Biking Helps IRL

By Cara Maclean

Photo: Cara Maclean

It’s Spring, the weather is warmer. It’s the time when people start venturing out more, especially after this last year! My little family hops on our mountain bikes and finds some hills to ride. Last weekend, we found a perfect spot for the boys to ride that’s fun for us too. I’m not the best rider, but I’ve improved over the years. I know enough to shout reminders at my kids, which I’d probably do even if they didn’t need it. I’m sure I’ll learn to keep more to myself when they’re older and let them blissfully take risks as I silently cringe. As I watched my kiddos zip around corners and zoom along the trail, it occurred to me that these biking reminders apply to life as well.

The consequences are different, but the reminders are equally helpful. You won’t be careening off a cliff or ending up in the weeds. At least, I hope not. You could, however, end up in a life you don’t enjoy or in a seemingly inescapable slump. No bueno.

To improve the flow of mountain biking (and life), remember these three things:

1. Look where you want to go!

If you’re looking at the scary obstacles, or down the edge of a cliff where you could plummet to your death, you’re more likely to go there. Keep your sights on where you want to go, especially around the curves. When things change direction slightly, it’s easier to lose focus or control. That’s the time when it’s most important to keep your sights on where you want to go. Eyes up!

2. Get some speed for the obstacles, then you’ll flow right over them!

Going over rocks, roots, and bumps are harder on the way up because you’re going slow. Once you get stronger, you’ll be able to go faster and roll right over the obstacles. No need to go crazy, but momentum keeps the flow going. You won’t even notice the little problems (bumps) along the way because your momentum will carry you over them easily. Same in life. If you’re not taking much action toward your goal, the problems seem insurmountable. Once you start taking action, you get stronger, and those little bumps aren’t a big deal anymore. You know you’re strong enough to handle them.

3. You’ve got to work a little at first to enjoy the fun that comes next! 

When we first attempt any kind of incline with our boys, we get a fair amount of whining. (I’ll admit, when I first started biking, I whined just as much. Who enjoys biking up hills? My husband. 😬) Whining doesn’t help get you to the top, so I do my best to cheerfully get my kids to change their perspective. It’s not that you have to work yourself into the ground by working hard, but there’s always hard stuff! You’ve got to pedal those legs, take action, and make the uncomfortable stuff part of the fun. It makes you stronger and you learn to enjoy the entire journey, not just the endpoint.

Sometimes when we achieve goals it feels anticlimactic. We don’t take time to celebrate the achievement; it’s on to the next thing. If you enjoy the whole ride of life, not just the easy stuff or the successes, then you honor the whole experience. You celebrate, learn, and enjoy the whole trip. What journey are you on right now that you could celebrate more? Maybe grab a bike, go for a ride, and think about it!

 

Cara Maclean, Wellness Coach & Writer, works with moms to undo what keeps them exhausted. We cultivate the calm, joyful energy needed to handle any challenge with humor and grace. Author of Just the Way It Is: A Look at Gifted/2e Families, Spring 2022, GHF Press. Learn more at CaraMaclean.com

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New Research Sheds Light on Bilingual Baby Talk

by Erica Loop

Is your baby bilingual? Whether they learn one language or two, new research shows babies prefer infant-direct speech (a.k.a. baby talk) over mature adult communications.

Research from UCLA’s Language Acquisition Lab and 16 other global speech labs looked at infants’ interest levels when they were exposed to two different languages. The study, published in the journal Advances in Methods and Practices in Psychological Science, took place across four continents and included 333 bilingual and 384 monolingual babies ages six to nine months and 12 to 15 months.

photo: Filipe Leme via Pexels

Megha Sundara, a UCLA linguistics professor and director of the Language Acquisition Lab said, “Crucially for parents, we found that development of learning and attention is similar in infants, whether they’re learning one or two languages.” Sundara added, “And, of course, learning a language earlier helps you learn it better, so bilingualism is a win-win.”

The researchers asked the parent participants to hold their babies as infant-direct speech (baby talk) or adult-directed speech was played from speakers coming from either the right or left direction. To assess interest, the researchers measured the length of time the infant looked toward the direction of the sound. As it turns out, both bilingual and monolingual babies prefer baby talk to parent-speech.

Victoria Mateu, a UCLA assistant professor of Spanish and Portuguese, said of the results, “The longer they looked, the stronger their preference.” Mateu continued, “Babies tend to pay more attention to the exaggerated sounds of infant-directed speech.”

If you’re wondering why both bilingual and monolingual infants might prefer baby talk, Mateu said, “Baby talk has a slower rate of speech across all languages, with more variable pitch, and it’s more animated and happy.”

—Erica Loop

 

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Can Dogs & Kids Sync Up Their Behaviors? New Study Has Answers

by Erica Loop

New research from the Oregon State University revealed that dogs may synchronize their behavior with the children they live with. The study, which was published in the journal Animal Cognition, sheds light on how a canine companion may bond with their human family.

Researchers looked at interactions between 30 children from the ages of eight and 17 and their family dogs. The researchers instructed each child how to walk their dog through an empty room with color-coded tape lines on the floor.

photo: Helena Lopes via Pexels

Each child-dog pair’s walk was videotaped and analyzed for the degree of active synchrony (the amount of time each pair moved or was stationary together), proximity, and orientation/same direction of movement. The researchers found a higher level of active synchrony than they had expected—but less than what is typically found in dog-adult interactions.

Even though this research shows dogs don’t synchronize their behavior to match children to the same extent they do with their adult pet parents, the study’s results were still significant. Oregon State animal behaviorist Monique Udell, the lead author of the study said, “The great news is that this study suggests dogs are paying a lot of attention to the kids that they live with.”

Udell continued, “They are responsive to them and, in many cases, behaving in synchrony with them, indicators of positive affiliation and a foundation for building strong bonds.” The researcher added, “Sometimes we don’t give children and dogs enough credit. Our research suggests that with some guidance we can provide important and positive learning experiences for our kids and our dogs starting at a much earlier age, something that can make a world of difference to the lives of both.”

—Erica Loop

 

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It’s a Bard Knock Life: DIY Shakespearean Collar

by Amber Guetebier

All the world’s a stage and for the kiddos that whole world might be your living room right now. Revisit Elizabethan times with this collar made from coffee filters, an easy craft your baby bards can help out with, an easy and cute DIY costume. Read on for thine own directions.

coffee filter shakespeare collar tutorial
You will need: 

Coffee filters (white ones are best)
Ribbon or string
Hole punch
Stapler
Scissors

Step 1. Fold your coffee filter in half, then in half again. You can stop here (folded in fourths) or keep going to one more fold (which works better for smaller necks).

Step 2. Staple your folded piece, about 3/4″ or so.

Step 3. Hole punch just under the staple.

coffee filter shakespeare collar tutorial
Step 4. Cut the point off the folded filter, just under the hole you made.

Step 5. Measure your string or ribbon to fit the child’s neck, then add a few inches on each side for ease of tying. String ’em!

elizabethan collar shakespeare costume kid

Tips & Tricks
The pieces tend to stay the same direction when stapled/punched/cut the same size and length or at least close. With kids the results are sure to be a bit uneven, so try to keep a little space between the pieces when stringing. It seems counter-intuitive but actually helps them stay flat (so they fan out better).

You are probably going to need 30-50 filters, more the bigger the kid.

 

Did you measure-for-measure your collar? Share pictures with us on Instagram and tag them #redtricycle. 

—All photos and copy by Amber Guetebier

 

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Should You Tip the Babysitter?

By Gay Cioffi

I know from my own experience as a parent with young children that the costs of a night out plus paying the sitter can sometimes make even the briefest outing… out of financial reach. So I’m not surprised when parents ask questions relating to compensation for the occasional babysitter. What is the going hourly rate? Should one tip? What about providing meals and snacks? Should you provide access to Netflix, etc…?

As it turns out, I was just in the position of hiring a babysitter for my granddaughter, so I had recently pondered some of these same queries myself.

It appears that compensation varies from community to community, and you can get a good idea about the going hourly rate by asking around. The best practice is to inquire directly with the sitter about rates before booking. Rounding up to the nearest hour seems to be a common practice, whereas tipping is not. In our case, we knew that the sitter had traveled at least 45 minutes on the NYC subway in each direction, so we factored her nearly two hours of travel time into her compensation.

Of course, if your sitter pitches in to do a major clean-up or takes on some other household tasks, or if they are called upon to stay much longer than initially planned, they deserve additional compensation beyond their hourly wage.

I can’t stand the idea of not sharing food—when it seems that I always have way more than I need—so I usually encourage sitters to help themselves. However, that is an individual thing and may depend on the hours that the sitter is in your home. For example, a caregiver who is there from four until ten should be provided with dinner.

As someone who started babysitting as soon as I hit the double digits, age-wise, I have a great appreciation for the profession.

I am a parent and grandparent with over four decades of experience in early childhood education. I share my passion, wisdom and experience, with parents and the people who care for and about children at Little Folks Big Questions, where we're out to answer the questions parents face in today's world.

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This Teacher Came Up with an Ingenious Way to Help Kids with Their Mental Health

by Shahrzad Warkentin

A high school teacher’s clever idea for a mental health check-in chart for her students has gone viral—and now it’s helping teens across the country.

Erin Castillo, a teacher at John F. Kennedy High School in Fremont, California, shared the mental health chart she created for her students in an Instagram post that has since gone viral. The chart invites students to write their names on the back of a post-it note and stick the note to the column that best describes how they are feeling on any given day.

The options are, “I’m great”, “I’m okay,” “I’m meh,” “I’m struggling,” “I’m having a hard time and wouldn’t mind a check in” or “I’m in a really dark place.” If students choose one of the last two, Castillo will check in with them privately and refer them to the school counselor.

“I’ve had a lot of students in the last five years of my career that have struggled with self-confidence, self-doubt, image, had suicidal thoughts, attempted suicide and, after seeing all that, I’ve been making it a theme in my classroom and trying to check in with them,” Castillo said.

It has also become a useful tool for kids struggling academically as well, Castillo explained. “I’ll have a student that will be struggling with something I’m teaching and they’ll put a post-it up instead of raising their hand,” she said.

Not only has Castillo’s post been liked thousands of times, but it has also inspired other teachers to create and share mental health charts of their own. “If it can help one student, then it’d be better than where we’re at now,” Castillo said. “I hope it gets to a place where we can talk about our struggles openly and our mental health. This looks like a step in the right direction.”

—Shahrzad Warkentin

Featured photo: Kelli Cessac via Instagram

 

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Warning: You’re Probably Talking to Your Kids Too Much

By Gay Cioffi

I have spent a lot of time instructing parents to talk to their children, especially young children; to narrate their lives, and to give them lots of information. While I stand by this guidance, I feel the need to qualify this suggestion with words of caution about talking to children too much.

As the director of a nursery school, I continually reminded teachers to talk less. Without that direction, staff could easily fall into a constant barrage of praise and “do’s and don’ts” to their students with little space for children to think. The same thing can happen with families when parents are providing constant feedback, both positive and negative, about every move their child makes.

By now everyone is familiar with the term “helicopter” parent, a word first used in 1969 which became an official dictionary entry in 2011, that refers to an over-involved parent. This is the mother or father who basically shadows a child directing their every action — hovering.

When a parent provides continuous commentary on the behavior of a child, there are several common outcomes. One, the child becomes stressed over such constant scrutiny, two, the child feeling overloaded begins to tune out the parent and or three, the child becomes dependent on the constant feedback and doesn’t function well without it. None of these outcomes help support healthy emotional growth.

My advice to parents is to make an “economy of words” your goal. Instead of making a statement like, “we don’t have time to go to the playground today” then adding lots of reasons why, filling in all the blanks about how your child might feel about it, then adding a lengthy apology, just state a simple version of the fact and let it be. Give your child space to process and ask questions. However, in answering them, keep it simple. This approach is harder than it looks. And even I, who has lots of practice talking to children, sometimes struggle to keep it simple.

I recently witnessed a parent over-speak to her toddler while the young child decided which slide of the double slide to go down. The parent encouraged the child to go down the slide, and when she didn’t, the adult began a lengthy narrative about why she wasn’t going down. “You are scared” “You can’t decide” “Maybe this slide is too high for you” and on and on and on. The child appeared overwhelmed not just at the prospect of going down the slide but with processing all the commentary coming her way.

Like so much of parenting the concept of balance plays a huge role in how it should be approached. For example, routines and schedules are important, but so is flexibility. Preparing children for upcoming events is a good idea until too much information, too far in advance, creates anxiety and confusion. Narrating a child’s experience is vital to develop language and build vocabulary, but it can be taken too far.

So yes, talk to children but be sure to allow space for children to think and process information. And instead of always projecting your thoughts and emotions onto an experience, be sure to ask them what their perceptions are. Listening is just as important as talking.

I am a parent and grandparent with over four decades of experience in early childhood education. I share my passion, wisdom and experience, with parents and the people who care for and about children at Little Folks Big Questions, where we're out to answer the questions parents face in today's world.

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5 Ways that Job Hunting & Dating are the Same

By Ruthi Davis

Dear Confessional,

I have been a complete disaster for the last week. Finally, the tides have changed because I boldly took the leap to change my professional direction and chase my dreams. My philosophy is “go big or go home,” so when I created my own door of opportunity and it actually opened, my life flashed before me. No, I wasn’t dying—I was reflecting, projecting, inspired, overwhelmed, thankful, and so truly happy. I really relish that feeling because it doesn’t surface often in life. Then I tried to remember when I felt like I was riding on this rollercoaster last, and that’s when it dawned on me—landing your dream job feels exactly like landing a date with your dream guy.

Even though I’ve been out of the dating pool for a really long time, I must admit, once the butterflies, jitters, and excitement to the point of nausea takes over, it’s pretty hard to forget. You just know it when you feel it.

1. Taking the leap: So you got the guts to get on the playing field and put yourself out there. It’s so exciting and makes you feel so vulnerable, doesn’t it? What if you get a “no”? What if it’s a “yes”? Ok, what do I say first? What if I sound stupid? Should I just go for it or practice what I’m going to say with a friend first? Wait, what the heck am I doing? Who do I think I am? Ugh, just stop over-thinking and just go for it already! Stop questioning yourself and don’t let this opportunity slip away! Ok, I’m doing this. I can do this. What’s the worst thing that can happen, right?

2. Crazy phone checks: OMG, I did it. I think I’m going to be sick. Let me check my phone now. Did he call? Nope. Ok, need to check my e-mail. Nothing yet. Maybe it went to Spam mail. Twitter? Ok stop right now, no cyber-stalking, what’s wrong with you? Chill out! Maybe there’s something wrong with my phone. Yeah, maybe I should power down and reboot? Ok, no, I’ll wait a minute first. No maybe I’ll check e-mail again before I do that.

3. Butterflies galore: Oooh, so excited I could throw up. Constant jittery jumping beans, I feel like I could jump out of my skin with anticipation! The shakey tummy is nonstop. Holy crap, will something please just happen?! But wait, not yet, there’s so much to do! What do I do in the meantime to get my mind off of it?

4. Meeting greeting: What do I wear? What should I say? What if I sound like a rambling idiot? I need to prepare. What if it gets awkward? Do I have anything in my teeth? I hope we hit it off. Do I look ok? Oh geez, I’m a mess. My hands are sweaty and my knee won’t stop shaking. Chill out, woman! Do I have anything in my teeth?

5. Call back: Wow, that was awesome. Do you think it went well? You think I came across ok? I really hope it works out. Let me check my phone and see if I got a message. Do you think I’ll get asked back?

After having four kids, spending the last decade either being pregnant or taking care of a tiny tot, and mostly working as a writer and editor for a trade magazine, taking a leap of faith and changing directions can seem a bit exhilarating, daunting, refreshing, and just right. What’s even better is when that defining moment occurs at the right place and at the right time. Just like in a relationship, sometimes you just know. The best part is grasping the life-changing enormity of it all.

Even though these last few days have felt like I’m going to be sick with overwhelming excitement and happiness about my new direction, I hope this feeling stays so vibrant and fresh. After my fourth child began school, and it was just myself for the first time since I was in my 20’s, I made the conscious decision to figure out who I truly am and what I want—and then to relentlessly and passionately chase my dreams.

I made a firm decision that during this time, I would wholeheartedly carry out my vision, do it in digestible doses, learn from it, grow with it… and most importantly, love it every step of the way. I feel most blessed to have landed my dream guy and enjoy my full family. Thankfully, I can now also relish in landing my dream direction that I have always wanted.

If you’re truly passionate about your vision, then work for it and live it. That’s how dreams become your reality.

The only way to reach the top of that professional mountain is with one small step at a time. Don’t look up and get overwhelmed— just focus on the simple path and each simple step that guides you there.

This is it—time to shine.

with Love,

Ruthi

Ruthi Davis is a the Founder of Ruth Davis Consulting LLC with over two decades of success in advertising/marketing, media/publicity, business development, client relations, and organizational optimization for a variety of clients. Ruthi is a proud mom and influencer in the parenting and family market as founder of the Superfly Supermom brand.

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Freshly Picked’s New “Peter Pan” Moccs are a Neverland Dream

by Shahrzad Warkentin

If your tiny walker just can’t wait to fly off to Neverland then the new Freshly Picked Disney Peter Pan moccs are the perfect fit.

Freshly Picked has just released a new collection of Peter Pan-themed Disney moccasins and they are definitely made with a sprinkle of Pixie Dust. The line includes three different designs featuring all your favorite characters like Tinker Bell, Peter Pan, Captain Hook and the Lost Boys. Check out all the adorable styles below.

Tinker Bell Bow

This sweet glittering style is available in a regular mocc and mini sole.

$59 - $65

Neverland City

Get a bird's eye view of Neverland and all of its inhabitants. Available in moccs and mini sole.

$59 - $65

Flight to Neverland

Point your toes in the direction of Neverland with this dreamy design. Available in moccs and mini sole.

$59 - $65

—Shahrzad Warkentin

All photos: Freshly Picked

 

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