Dear Mom Who Is Totally Screwing Up

By Rhiannon Giles

May 24, 2022

Dear Mom Who Is Totally Screwing Up,

Today my six-year-old daughter screamed the whole way home because I would not buy her a pottery wheel. Today I lost my patience. I will lose my patience again tomorrow.

I sometimes clean up her messes, because I can’t deal with the potential meltdown or maintain the calm presence required to walk her through how to clean it on her own.

I let her watch kids’ shows with obnoxious characters who whine a lot and lack depth.

I tune her out after hours of nonstop talking. Lord knows what I have given her permission to do when answering with a vague, “Yeah, sure.”

Yesterday she informed me that she hates quesadillas, one of the five or so foods she has always willingly consumed. Eat chicken nuggets then. Whatever.

I catch myself whining at her in the same voice that enrages me when it comes from her mouth. I am failing by example.

I’ve read the articles; I know the current “rules” of being a great mother. I think most of those carefully curated “shoulds” were written by liars and people who have never been around children. At best, they are hopeful ideals.

I gave in to the tantrum because my brain was so loud, and it was the only way to filter out some of the noise.

I am not teaching her enough about empathy and equity and racism and compassion and feminism and and and…

I said it was time to go! Get your shoes on right now!

Kids need rules and structure and patience. Those things do not play well together. Probably because their mothers failed them.

I played on my phone. I played on my phone because I needed to escape, and if you just leave your kid at the park, people call CPS.

In a minute, I’m busy right now.

I’m busy not volunteering at school. Not reading enough books to her. Not not not.

Inside my head, there is a version of me sitting with my head between my knees and my hands over my ears. Inside my head, there’s a version of my kids tapping me on the shoulder, repeating, “Mommy, watch this. Mom. Mommy. Mom.” Because of course.

But I do know this. At the end of the day, she asks to cuddle. She shares her dinnertime candy with me because she “likes to do nice things for people.” She talks about the fun things I actually mustered up the energy to do, not as a way of saying how much better I could be, but as a way of saying how much “enough” I am. She sometimes mimics my worst but also mimics my best.

So maybe there is hope. Maybe it’s not so bad. Maybe there is always tomorrow.

Dear Mom Who Is Totally Screwing Up, I wish this could be one of those uplifting messages about how you’re really not. But maybe you are. How the hell would I know? All I have to offer you is solidarity and a glass of wine.

Maybe maybe will have to be enough.

Originally published Sept. 2016.

Rhiannon Giles

Tinybeans Voices Contributor

Rhiannon Giles is an overwhelmed mother who only occasionally considers giving her children to the circus. She has a sarcasm problem and writes regularly at rhiyaya.com. To keep up with new posts and see some of her favorites, join her on Facebook and Twitter.

Disney’s New Musical Series Aims to Educate Kids on Race & Social Justice

by Sarah ShebekMay 20, 2021

Current events aren’t always easy to navigate as an adult, let alone as a child. That’s why Disney Junior just announced the launch of the new animated short series Rise Up, Sing Out.

The series aims to present critical concepts around race, racism and social justice for a pint-sized audience and will use music-based shorts to make the message resonate. To make the series even more impactful, Disney has recruited the talents of Ahmir “Questlove” Thompson and Tariq “Black Thought” Trotter of the Grammy Award winning musical group, The Roots.

In a joint statement the two musicians said, “It is an honor to work with the Disney Junior team to help create a series of shorts that will empower and uplift the future generations in the way we know best, through music. We hope these shorts will encourage the young audience to recognize and celebrate our differences as human beings while learning the tools to navigate real-world issues of racial injustice.”

That’s not all—The Conscious Kid, an organization dedicated to equity and healthy racial identity development is serving as a consultant on the series and plans to develop a viewing companion guide for parents. Latoya Raveneau, who is involved with the upcoming The Proud Family: Louder and Prouder will serve as executive producer.

You’ll be able to watch later this year on all Disney Junior platforms.

—Sarah Shebek

Image courtesy of Disney Junior

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Target’s Newest Badge Helps ID Asian-Owned Brands to Support

by Sarah ShebekMay 18, 2021

It’s easier than ever to support Asian-owned businesses online, thanks to a new initiative from Target. The retailer just announced a badge that identifies Asian-owned brands and they’re spotlighting these products online as Asian/Pacific American Heritage Month continues.

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Whether you’re looking for coconut chips or a new children’s book, you can find the badge in the “At A Glance” section of the product description. It accompanies two other badges that Target has released in the past year: a Black-owned business badge and a women-owned business badge. And it’s in line with the company’s mission to leverage change and shift power to communities, as noted in March on the Target Foundation page.

“We stand firmly against racism, racialized misogyny, and xenophobia in all forms. Through our existing approach in driving systems-level change, we are committed to centering equity and investing in Black, Indigenous, and Person of Color-led (BIPOC) organizations. As part of our commitment to action against hate, we are investing $250,000 in organizations led by Asian Americans, working to empower the Asian American community, addressing gender-based violence and xenophobia, and advancing justice.”

—Sarah Shebek

Featured image courtesy of Target

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10 Organizations You Can Donate to for Mother’s Day (because She’s Got Plenty of Mugs)

by Camesha GoshaMay 5, 2021

Mother’s Day 2021 is right around the corner, and this year, instead of the flowers and mugs, what better way to celebrate the mother figure in your life than gifting something moms need at every stage—support. How can you do that? By making a donation in honor of mom to an organization that dedicates itself to helping women and mothers everywhere, but especially those living in diverse communities. From the Black Mamas Matter Alliance to Every Mother Counts, these groups are vital to making real change that will help all parents and kids get through life safely and healthy. We’ve highlighted our top charities to give to below, so keep reading, and get ready to be inspired!

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Every Mother Counts

For many women, pregnancy and childbirth aren’t joyful experiences. There are many reasons for this including lack of quality health care and discrimination. Every Mother Counts is dedicated to ensuring that women have access to quality maternal care by investing in organizations that make quality, respectful and equitable care possible.

Learn more and donate here.

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The National Birth Equity Collaborative

The National Birth Equity Collaborative focuses on creating solutions to issues in Black maternal and infant health. They do that through various efforts, including training and advocating for policy change. Their work helps to create the conditions for the assurance of optimal births for all people.

Learn more and donate here.

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Mamatoto Village

Mamatoto Village aims to offer creative solutions to combat health disparities for moms and their babies. That could look like anything from creating a path to careers in maternal health to providing access to services so moms can make informed decisions. The core values of the village include advocacy, equity and being inclusive.

Learn more and donate here.

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Black Mamas Matter Alliance

Black Mamas Matter Alliance champions rights, respect and resources for mothers. Their mission is to advocate for Black mothers. They push for research and policy changes when it comes to maternal health, rights and justice.

Learn more and donate here.

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Moms Rising

Moms Rising educates the public about issues facing women and mothers. They work by starting grassroots efforts to bring awareness to issues, amplifying the voices of millions of women and pursueing policy changes.

Learn more and donate here.

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Shades of Blue Project

Shades of Blue Project is dedicated to breaking cultural barriers in maternal health mental health. They are a presence for women before, during and after giving birth. They are committed to changing the way healthcare systems engage with patients.

Learn more and donate here.

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Lotto Love

LottoLove aims to make moms feel good while helping women around the world. LottoLove is the first-ever scratch-off card with a social mission. For every scratch card purchased, the organization donates to charities they’ve partnered with. Those charities provide clean water and literacy tools, among other things, to people in over 60 countries.

Learn more and donate here.

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The Finley Project

The Finley Project is very personal for the founder, Noelle Moore, who tragically lost her newborn daughter. The organization was started to help mothers after the heartbreaking loss of an infant. It supports mothers physically, mentally and spiritually—at no cost to them.

Learn more and donate here.

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The Homeless Prenatal Program

The Homeless Prenatal Program has the goal to break the cycle of childhood poverty. How do they do this? Most people are extra motivated to create a better way of life when they are pregnant. The program uses that motivation to help families discover their strengths and trust in their ability to change their lives.

Learn more and donate here.

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Commonsense Childbirth

Commonsense Childbirth is dedicated to better birthing experiences for women and families. They focus on safety and quality in their quest for equitable maternal care. They also never turn a mom away—regardless of ability to pay.

Learn more and donate here.

—Camesha Gosha

Featured image: iStock

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Catch Lupita Nyong’o in Her New Role: Superhero!

by Erica LoopMarch 16, 2021

There’s a new superhero—and her name is Super Sema! The animated 10-year-old Kenyan girl is part of a new series, headed by Oscar-winning actress Lupita Nyong’o.

Nyong’o voices Super Sema’s title character and is an equity partner in the series’ production company, Kukua. According to Kukua’s website, the production company’s mission is, “To empower the children of the 21st century with the skills and capacity to dream beyond what they think is possible and to imagine and create a better world.”

The new series follows Super Sema and her twin brother MB as they set out to protect their African town of Dunia. Not only is this series an animated superhero adventure, it also emphasizes the importance of science and technology.

Series star, Nyong’o, told Variety, of the production company and the show, “I share Kukua’s goal to empower children through inspiring stories that feature characters in which the children see themselves reflected.” The actress explained that her reaction to the show made her see, “How starved we have been as Africans for kid programming that centers us.”

For more information on Super Sema, visit the show’s website here. Your kiddos can currently catch eight episodes of the animated superhero/science-y show on YouTube!

—Erica Loop

All photos: Courtesy of Kakua

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Want to Buy Your Very Own Amusement Park? Here’s How!

by Erica LoopFebruary 23, 2021

Are you an amusement park enthusiast to the max? If you’re a carousel connoisseur or rave about roller coasters to no end, Clementon Park in New Jersey has a deal you’ll want to learn more about.

The park, which was founded in 1907, is for sale—and now you can live out your daydreams and become its sole owner!

photo courtesy of PRNewswire/CRG

So how does one go about buying an entire amusement park? Clementon Park in Clementon, New Jersey will hit the auction block on Mar. 23. Capitol Recovery Group (CRG), a global private equity firm, is auctioning the park as a whole or split into individual parts. This means you can score an entire amusement park with everything you need included or just buy the land, amusement equipment, rides, buildings, or liquor license.

CRG President Bill Firestone said, in a press release, “We are actively seeking a buyer for this iconic park located outside of Philadelphia and expect significant interest in the auction.” Firestone added, “The property includes a 25-acre lake, dam, amusement rides, a water park and a full liquor license.”

Way back in 1907 Clementon was founded by Theodore Gibbs and his sons as a “trolley park.” Located at the end of a trolley line, the park was initially built to encourage weekend ridership. Clementon was family owned until 2011. The park closed its doors in 2019.

If you’re ready to turn your dreams into a reality—bidders can register for the auction on CRG’s website here.

—Erica Loop

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The Easiest Way for Oregonians to Have Fun and Do Good

by Jamie AderskiJanuary 27, 2021

Who doesn’t love to take a chance now and again and dream of a lottery win? A ticket in hand is an affordable thrill that can potentially pay off big, at least for some lucky winner. But there are even better reasons to play Oregon Lottery games. Over half of Oregon Lottery proceeds go to support Oregon’s public schools. That dollar or two you put in fate’s hands serves a great purpose—helping local teachers and students achieve their very best.

A Commitment to Education

Oregonians have demonstrated time and again their commitment to the educational well-being of Oregon’s students. That’s why in 1995, voters passed a constitutional amendment that requires a portion of Oregon Lottery proceeds go to public education, benefitting students from kindergarten through college. Because of Lottery funding, schools across the state have more resources to pay for much-needed textbooks, computers, classroom equipment and education-related services.

Oregon's Teacher of the Year

As part of its support for public education, the Oregon Lottery also sponsors Oregon’s Teacher of the Year program. This year’s recipient, Nicole Butler-Hooton, is an inspiring second-grade teacher at Irving Elementary School in Eugene. Her win comes with a $5,000 award for her and a matching $5,000 for Irving Elementary. The title will give Nicole the opportunity to share her passion, equity-driven and inclusive teaching practices, on a state and national level. As the first Native American to win the Oregon Teacher of the Year title, Nicole’s win is inspiring to students and the community alike!

Do good things, with the Oregon Lottery!

Learn more about how your lottery dollars help support education in Oregon.

—Jamie Aderski

The Sesame Workshop’s Latest Collab Reinvents Play for All Abilities

by Jennifer SwartvagherJanuary 11, 2021

Originally focused on helping children with disabilities express their creativity through music, the team at SKOOG created a suite of unique hands-on technology devices that children of all abilities can enjoy. Their patented platform includes a parent-controlled app with unique cube-like hardware hat allows your little ones to play and create without relying solely on a smartphone screen. Now they have partnered with Sesame Street to pair SKOOG technology with Sesame Workshop’s early childhood expertise and educational content.

By pressing soft, squeezable, interchangeable RFID buttons on their SKOOG Cube, little ones will be able to enjoy interactive songs, games and stories featuring the voices of beloved Sesame Street characters.

“Children’s interactive play has never been as important as it is right now. In today’s complex digital world, we set out on a mission to help motivate and inspire children, leading the shift from passive consumption to active engagement—while enabling children of all abilities to play, engage, and consume safe and smart content independently,” said Gregg Stein, SKOOG Inc., CEO. “As huge Sesame Street fans, we’re thrilled to be collaborating with Sesame Workshop, a community of creators, educators, and unforgettable characters built on diversity, equity, and inclusion. Together, we have created a best-in-class physical and digital creative sandbox that will empower millions of children to experience the joy of infinitely expandable personal play patterns, enabled by stories and audio books, branching adventures, games, musical instruments, songs and so much more.”

“Playful learning is at the heart of everything we do at Sesame Workshop, so we’re thrilled to work with SKOOG, Inc. to bring this enriching new play experience to life,” said Scott Chambers, Sesame Workshop’s Senior Vice President & General Manager, North America Media & Licensing. “We hope that our unique combination of SKOOG technology and Sesame Workshop’s powerful content will inspire kids and families to get creative together – with a little help from the Sesame Street Muppets!”

SKOOG is launching at CES Digital 2021. Be the first to learn more by signing up at: https://skoog.media/

—Jennifer Swartvagher

All photos courtesy of SKOOG

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Random House Children’s Books Partners With American Ballet Theatre to Release New Titles

by Jennifer SwartvagherOctober 9, 2020

Random House Children’s Books together with American Ballet Theatre (ABT) just announced a multi-year, multi-book publishing program to launch in fall 2020. The program will debut with the publication of two picture books written by John Robert Allman. B Is for Ballet and Boys Dance! was to coincide with the opening of the American Ballet Theatre’s 80th-anniversary fall season, had it not been canceled due to COVID-19.

Mallory Loehr, Senior Vice President and Publishing Director, Random House Books for Young Readers Group, said “We celebrate and support ABT’s dedication to diversity, equity, and inclusion, and those tenets will be reflected in the stories we publish for young readers, with guidance and support from the team at ABT. It is our hope to educate children and foster a love of dance through the powerful medium of storytelling.”

B Is For Ballet is an alphabetical celebration of the world of ballet and its dancers, dances, choreographers, positions, terminology, and history. Boys Dance! is a picture book about boys who take ballet lessons and the dance heroes who inspire them.

American Ballet Theatre Executive Director Kara Medoff Barnett said, “As American Ballet Theatre celebrates eight triumphant decades and looks to the future, we are thrilled to introduce eight children’s books to inspire the next generation of artists and audiences. With Random House Children’s Books, we will tell unexpected stories that reveal the adventure and the humanity behind the scenes as dancers pursue their dreams.”

B Is for Ballet and Boys Dance! are both available on Amazon.

—Jennifer Swartvagher

All photos courtesy of Random House

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Decorate Your Front Door and Help Girls Around the World

by Leah R. SingerOctober 2, 2020

October 11 is International Day of the Girl, a day dedicated to raising awareness of the need for girls’ rights. It’s also the perfect opportunity to teach your kids —boys and girls—about the importance of gender equality and girls’ rights around the world. Not sure how to show your girl power? Plan International USA made it easy for your family to support girls worldwide with its Girl Unlocked Campaign.

Plan International USA is a nonprofit organization that strives to advance children’s rights and equality for girls. They do this by engaging people and communities to make vital changes and tackle the root causes of discrimination against girls, exclusion and vulnerability. This year’s International Day of the Girl is more important than ever with a global pandemic affecting girls in so many ways.

Plan International USA wants your family show support for girls and young women as they push through doors and unlock their power and potential by decorating your front door in honor of International Day of the Girl. Participating is super easy. Here’s what you do!

1. Decorate your front door with equal signs and bold messages about gender equality. Think images of strong women, hearts, stars—anything that showcases messages and symbols of equity and girl empowerment. You can get as colorful and creative as you want and can find some ideas here!

2. While you decorate, use this opportunity to talk to your kids about equality, girls’ rights and empowerment.

3. Work on this fun activity anytime!

4. Share a photo of your front door on social media along with the hashtag #GirlUnlocked and tag @PlanUSA on Facebook and Twitter, and @Plan_USA on Instagram. In your post, include a brief message in your post about your family’s hopes for the next generation of girls.

This project is an awesome way for families to come together—in a pandemic-friendly way—and express their creativity through messages of girl power and equality to support girls around the world.

Plan International USA also hosted more activities in support of the International Day of the Girl, including their signature Girl Takeovers, where girls assume leadership roles in major corporations, governments, and nonprofits for the day, and female-led online workshops. You can check out the Freedom Online Report, sign a letter to make sure girls’ voices are heard, and visit the Unlock the Vote hub to learn about important girls’ rights issues before Election Day and how Plan has joined forces with theSkimm to help drive voting and bring attention to key issues.

Join in supporting Girl Unlocked today and share your creation using #GirlUnlocked! Learn more about Plan International USA.

—Leah R. Singer

ML Interest Tag: equity

Dear Mom Who Is Totally Screwing Up

By Rhiannon Giles

Rhiannon Giles

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