Here’s an easy way to explain the extra day to your kid

“What is leap year?” If you’ve heard that recently, and you’re wondering how to explain to your kiddos why there’s one extra day every four years, we’ve got easy answers. It’s simple (especially if they know how to count): Leap Year is all about keeping the calendar in sync with how long it takes Planet Earth to completely orbit the sun. And fun fact: It takes more than 365 days.

The earth takes almost six more hours to make its way around the sun. Add up those extra hours, and every four years, there’s an extra day on the calendar, which is where February 29th comes from.

The story of Leap Year goes way back to Julius Caesar, who added an extra day to February (this was the last month of the year in Roman times) over 2,000 years ago. However, his math wasn’t precise, and it wasn’t corrected until the Georgian calendar, which has a mathematical formula that keeps leap years in check. Yep, that means not every four years is necessarily a leap year! In layman’s terms, if the year is divisible by 100 but not 400, it’s not a leap year (e.g. 1900).

What does this mean if we didn’t have Leap Year? Well, dates would slowly shift, and eventually, the seasons would be way off. That could mean celebrating the 4th of July in the dead of winter!

And remember, while people born in February might be Leap Year babies, they can still celebrate on February 28th or March 1st!

Related: 100+ Fun Facts for Kids They’ll Want to Know

 

I want my kids to know that I worked hard to make sure that they got that one thing on their list they really wanted.

Like many, Christmas is one of my favorite holidays. It got especially magical after I had kids. I can’t wait to see their little faces light up on Christmas morning with delight as they burst out of their bedrooms with anticipation to see if Santa actually came.

You know, the man in red with the jolly disposition and the mystical elves that make toys from scratch and report back to the North Pole every night fueled by “cheer.” The man who somehow manages to make it across the entire world in one night and lives solely off of milk and cookies and Christmas spirit.

I love Santa. I love the idea of Santa. And I love that my kids think that Santa is magic. It adds an extra element to Christmas that fills them (and me) with excitement every year. What I refuse to play into is that Santa shows up with the expensive, hard-to-find gifts, while mom and dad bring things like socks and PJs.

The mere concept of a loving Santa and his reindeer helpers is one that I think brings hope and enchantment to kids’ lives during the holidays. After all, if we can get them to believe that there is a person in this world who flies with wingless, hoofed animals (one of which has a light bulb on his face), lives in a hidden land that you can’t find on a map, and has an entire staff of tiny, pointy-eared people who have not yet managed to go on strike for being forced into overtime in dangerous conditions like the freezing cold… well, I think we’ve done our jobs.

Isn’t that enough?

I work my butt off every year to make sure my kids have a good Christmas. To make sure that they are delivered just as many presents as their friends and that they aren’t missing any “hot items” they desperately asked for.

Related: Behind Every Magical Holiday Moment Is an Exhausted Mom

For a month straight, I live off of coffee and evergreen fumes trying to scrape together pennies to bring my little ones the most joy I can on the mind-blowing morning called Christmas. I become a gift ninja: assembling, wrapping, and hiding. On Christmas Eve, I morph into a woman who doesn’t need sleep or hydration to survive and spend hours setting up an entire display for my kids to enjoy when they wake up at the crack of dawn because… SANTA!

Did I mention I love Christmas? I really do.

It’s all worth it. It is. But I will be damned if I am going to let the big guy in the red suit take all of the credit for the gift that I had to fist-fight someone over in Target because it was the last one on the shelf. NO. WAY.

I want my kids to one day replicate the magic of Christmas in their own homes every year. But I also want them to appreciate the season for what matters. Gifts are great. Getting gifts as a kid is one of the most exciting parts of Christmas, but plenty of kids do not get gifts—and if they do, they may not be as cool, high-tech, or expensive as some of the ones my kids have received over the years.

How do I explain to them that some kids (the ones who really need the miracle) don’t get what is on their list from a man who theoretically brings presents to all kids who are good? Do I tell them those kids are bad? What makes those kids less deserving? Nothing.

And how do I explain that if we have had a year when money is tight, Santa suddenly doesn’t have the “disposable income” to supply the mountain of gifts he had in recent years? I can’t. Not without them losing some faith in the magic of the holiday.

Plus, I’m trying to raise responsible and grateful humans who understand the value of material things and what it takes to make and spend money. Christmas happens to throw all of that out the window for the weeks leading up to the big day and at least a good month after.

I want my kids to know that I worked hard to make sure that they got that one thing on their list they really wanted. That even though I might have missed a few important sports games or school events, it’s because I was working—working to make sure we have a roof over our heads, that our bills got paid, and also so that I could do things like buy them that gaming system they’d been pining for.

I want my kids to understand that Christmas is magical and that there are two people who make it so: Santa and me.

But in taking credit for the extra-special gifts, I have a better explanation for the other kids who may not get the same number or types of presents as they do and why our Christmas haul may vary from year to year. Plus, I don’t have to stress about remembering which gifts came from Santa and which didn’t when something doesn’t work correctly and I have to come up with some outlandish story about how I’m going to phone into the North Pole to get a replacement.

If you ask me, the magic of Santa lies in my kids’ believing: believing that there is someone watching them, rooting for them, and willing to dazzle them with his abilities every year because he loves them. He does it all in one night because he’s spectacular. And he brings things they will love and play with for the whole year (hopefully).

But the big-ticket stuff—the gift that they requested for months, the one that cost a small fortune and will bring the biggest smile and the most thanks? That one comes from Mom. After all, Santa has a group of elves to do his bidding—I’m all on my own.

This post originally appeared on Mom Transparenting.

I'm a single mom of three and realtor living in a suburb of Chicago. In my abundant spare time I like to write about parenting, family, divorce and raising a young transgender child. I'm just trying to raise kids who know how to turn off lights when they leave a room. 

Start with the basics

Veterans Day can be a tricky one to explain to the kiddos: their natural curiosity can lead to questions you may not be prepared to answer or questions for which the answers might seem frightening. (What is war? Will we go to war?) So we’ve come up with a few facts about Veterans Day for kids to help.

For families with active or retired military members, Veterans Day can take on a very significant meaning. But not everyone knows what it really represents or how to explain it to children. Unlike Memorial Day, which honors members of the military who died in service (click here to read more about the story of Memorial Day), Veterans Day honors those who have served in war (and are therefore veterans of the war). Many, many veterans are alive and well today and deserve their special day! 

Start with Facts about Veterans Day for Kids

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Veterans Day is November 11th, every year. (It is often observed as a legal holiday the nearest Monday to this date.)

Can you write the number 11? What about the word November?

If it’s always on the 11th, does it fall on the same day of the week every year?

What day does it fall on this year? (Hint: it’s Friday)

facts about Veterans Day for kids
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A veteran is someone who served in the military.

Have you heard of the Army, Navy, Air Force, Marines and Coast Guard? This is the military. The military is part of our government and is made up of people who have agreed to join the Army, Navy, Air Force, Marines, or Coast Guard, in order to become part of this branch of the government. They are trained for many situations, including emergencies at home. Their goal is to protect people who live in their country (and elsewhere).  

Do you know the difference between these different branches and what special skills or equipment they use? (As in airplanes, naval ships, etc.),

Draw a picture that might represent what the different branches of the military specialize in. 

Frank McKenna via Unsplash

A veteran is someone who served in the military during war.

The military is trained to fight in wars. Have you heard of war? What do you think it means?

Before you launch into the explanation of war, you can let kiddos know that for most countries, and especially in more recent times, world leaders negotiate before declaring war.

Know Your Kids

If your children are sensitive or very young, getting into details about war should be handled accordingly. While we aim to tell our children the truth, there’s no need to keep them up at night in fear. Focus your discussion on the veterans who have served in war and why it is important that we honor them on this day.

Here are a few reasons:

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You probably know one. Mom, Dad, Grandpa, Grandma, aunts and uncles, neighbors: chances are there’s a veteran in your life. Got a photo of the vet? Show your kids. Putting a face on the concept will help kiddos connect with it.

Regardless of how you feel about war or specific wars, the fact remains that the men and women who have served during war times did so with honor and bravery. Talk about being brave. What does it mean? Why is it important?

Showing gratitude. This is an excellent chance to show kiddos how to honor their country’s history and elders, and how to be kind. For great ideas on how to thank a veteran, check out this story.

It’s a conversation no parent wants to have, but if you have to, here’s what you can tell your child

As unfortunate as it might be, lockdown drills have become a regular occurrence at most public schools across the country, in some places as commonplace now as fire drills. And though they can be scary for young children, they’re necessary. They help to prepare and educate children about the proper and safe way to act in case of an emergency.

The first time our local elementary school did a lockdown drill when my son was in kindergarten, he came home a little shaken up. It’s not easy to explain to your child why lockdown drills are necessary or what exactly they’re protecting them against without inciting fear. But there are some strategies available for speaking to your children about the importance and purpose of lockdown drills. Here are just a few.

1. Stay Calm

Children often react first to an adult’s reaction, then to whatever situation is causing the reaction. For example, if your child falls and scrapes their knee. Their initial reaction might be to cry when they see the blood or because it hurts. But the severity of their reaction will have a lot to do with how you, as the parent, react. If you start panicking, your child will panic too because they’ll think there’s reason to: “If mommy is getting upset there must be something really wrong!”

This theory holds true for discussing lockdown drills. If you approach the subject with a calm and even tone, your child will not be initially alarmed. They’re more apt to calmly sit and listen to what you have to say. Acting in a paranoid or fearful way will only instill unnecessary fear in your child.

2. Be Open to Questions

You want your child to feel comfortable asking you questions, about anything in life, but especially about something they’re concerned or curious about. Try not to meet their questions with resistance or negativity. Be open to whatever is going on in their minds. The more knowledge and understanding of the situation they have, the more comfortable they may become with the practice.

3. Use Comparisons

It’s sometimes easier for children to understand a new concept when they have a familiar reference to compare it to. The most common and logical comparison to a lockdown drill is a fire drill. Most children are familiar with fire drills before they even enter public school. Many daycare and childcare centers are required to perform routine fire drills. You might even have a fire plan in place for your home.

Explain to your child that a lockdown drill is very similar to a fire drill. It’s something the schools use just in case of an emergency and for practice because practice makes perfect! You can even compare practicing drills to wearing a helmet or seat belt. You do these things to be safe, just in case there’s an accident or your child falls off their bike. These things may never happen, but if they do, you’re protected.

The more relaxed and less serious you remain while discussing lockdown drills, the more relaxed your child will be. Emphasize that lockdown drills aren’t just for the students but for teachers as well and that they’re designed to keep everyone safe.

4. Helping Them Understand the Threat

But as we know, lockdown drills are in place for a very serious reason. It’s perfectly fine to ease your young child’s mind by making “light” of the situation and explaining that it’s simply for practice. But your inquisitive child will likely ask what a lockdown drill is keeping them safe from.

They already view teachers and other adults as authority figures. Explain to your child that sometimes, adults and teachers see a potential threat or something unsafe that children don’t see. This threat may be nothing, but until the adults can determine that, a lockdown drill is a good way to keep them safe.

Your child’s next question might be, “Well, what kind of unsafe stuff?” My son is 7 and I try to be as honest with him as possible, without striking fear. He knows that people make poor choices at times—from his friends in class to adults. When discussing what threats lockdown drills are addressing, explain that it’s the school’s job to keep the children safe from any adults around that might be making poor choices. There’s really no need to explain further what those choices are.

I often tell my son, “Sometimes people just do things that we don’t understand. Things that we would never do.” If your child is a little bit older you can go as far as to say, “Sometimes people get angry and confused and end up hurting people.” You know your child best, so offer as much or as little explanation as you think is appropriate or necessary.

5. Encourage Your Child to Be a Helper

Most kids love nothing more than being a helper, especially to adults! Making children part of what’s going on is a great way to involve them in their own safety practice, such as lockdown drills.

The teachers at my son’s school wear whistles on their school lanyards. During a lockdown drill, the teacher is supposed to pop their head out the classroom door into the hallway and blow their whistle three times. This alerts anyone in the hallway or neighboring classrooms that a lockdown is in place, in case they aren’t already aware. The teacher then locks the classroom door and the children take their positions. It’s my son’s job to remind his teacher to blow the whistle. Other students have other “jobs” like reminding her to pull down the shades or helping their friends find their special hiding spots.

By involving children in the lockdown process, you’re empowering them with a sense of responsibility and involvement. This can help to ease their worry. It also gives them something to focus on, distracting them from any fear they might be experiencing.

Try asking your child about the lockdown drill process. “So, what do you do first?” or “What happens next?” Become excited and involved in what’s happening. Your child will feel important and may view the drill as a necessary “job” they have, not as a scary experience.

6. Always be Available

It’s important to always be available for your child to ask questions, voice their concerns and simply listen to what they have to say. The first few lockdown drills your child experiences might be scary for them, but over time, they should become more comfortable with the process. If you need further information or help explaining lockdown drills with your child, speaking to your school’s principal or the district superintendent can offer additional help and resources about your specific school district’s procedures.

I am a 32 year old mother of a son and wife to an officer. I am honest about both the love and struggle of parenting. I enjoy being active and writing is my passion, second only to my family.

If you’re looking for a snowflake science experiment, you’ve come to the right place

Whether your sidekick playfully carves out angels in the snow or sits at the window longing for some of that white stuff to actually fall, she’s all about the frosty flakes. And while play is her main motivation, she’s got serious questions about this wonderful winter phenomenon. Like, how do snowflakes form and what do they really look like up close? Dig deep with a flurry of experimental activities we’ve outlined below to find answers to all her snowflake science questions.

Piece It Together

girl learning about snowflake science
Allison Sutcliffe

We hate to break it to you, but those adorably sweet snowflake cutouts your kid has been bringing home from school this winter don’t pass scientific muster. Because even though folding paper to make four or eight-sided flakes are super easy, Mother Nature’s snowflakes showcase six-sided symmetry exclusively.

Before diving into your own masterpiece, introduce your scientifically-inclined sidekick to the principle that helps explain why six is the magic number for snowflakes: When the water/oxygen molecules bond during freezing they make hexagons. Recreate this microscopic lattice phenomenon on a larger scale using mini marshmallows and toothpicks with your kids (Click on the link above to find a handy-dandy diagram from Ohio State University!).

Cut It Out

learning about snowflake science
Allison Sutcliffe

Now that your kiddo’s got the six-sided thing down, it’s time to make some of your own scientifically accurate snowflakes from paper. We’ve found an easy way for the tot lot to get the signature six-sided look they’re going for (hint: it’s all about the fold). Simply follow this illustrated tutorial to make paper snowflakes that are true to life. And if you’re looking to bypass the mess, the Make-A-Flake digital option is definitely the way to go. Your tech-savvy tot can cut and save all her frosty creations and save trees too!

Get Real

learning about snowflake science
Marc Newberry via Unsplash

Observation is the next step when it comes to snowflake science. If you don't have fresh snow on the ground, you’ve got to get creative and make your own: Leave your freezer door open for a couple of minutes and then close it for 20. When you open it again, your inquisitive cutie should find frosty snowflakes lining the interior.

Now that you’ve got snow to work with, it’s time to get an up-close look at some of Mother Nature’s most delicately beautiful creations. To do this, you’ll need a magnifying glass and a dark piece of paper or, if you’re outside, you can also capture snowflakes on clothing like your gloves or jacket sleeve. Gather a few fresh flakes and use the magnifying glass to examine them in detail (If you’re working with freezer snowflakes, melting is an issue, so leave those tiny miracles in the freezer while you magnify.).

Reassure your little scientists that it’s true, no two are alike, and let them know that just one can be made up of over 200 tiny ice crystals! While you’re looking, have your mini-me count up the sides and use this chart to match what you’ve got in hand with standard ice crystals.

Related: Snowman-Inspired Snacks You Can Easily Pull Off

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Watch and Learn

Zdeněk Macháček via Unsplash

You’ve figured out a snowflake’s molecular structure, cut out creative and accurate examples of your own, and examined the real deal through a handheld magnifying glass. Now it’s time to take it one step further. Go behind the scene with rad videos that explain a ton of science behind snowflakes, like their formation and life cycle.

Science Friday’s Snowflake Safari follows Kenneth Libbrecht—CalTech’s resident snowflake expert—a scientist who’s spent a lot of time looking into these chilly chips, as he examines snowflake basics. Be sure to augment your own magnifying experience by flipping through some of Libbrecht’s spectacular snowflake slides online. They’re a great way to demonstrate many of the concepts you and your kiddo have already explored.

Finish up your viewing session with the National Science Foundation’s video about photographing snowflakes. It starts with the man who pioneered the field, Wilson “Snowflake” Bentley, and ends with the discoveries made by the Present Weather Imager, a high-tech camera that captures snowflakes in action. Lights, camera, learn!

Make Your Own

growing a snowflake crystal is a good snowflake science project
Allison Sutcliffe

Wrap up what you’ve learned about snowflake science by making a crystal snowflake of your own. Use pipe cleaners to create a six-sided snowflake that gets suspended in a Borax solution overnight. What’s created is a larger-than-life snowflake that’s just as sparkly as the ones that fall from the sky.

 

It’s not just about the PSL’s

Fall is just around the corner and despite the fact that summer is still dishing out its last gasps of heat, chances are you’re already dreaming about wooly scarves, UGG boots, and pumpkin spice lattes. If anyone happens to question your passion for pumpkins in August, you can explain it away with the scientific reason people love fall.

A 2013 study from YouGov found that America’s favorite season is fall, with 29% of Americans surveyed revealing that autumn is their top pick. So, what is it about fall that makes it so special for so many people, anyway?

Related: The Best Places to See Fall Colors with Kids This Year

Alisa Anton/Unsplash
Alisa Anton/Unsplash

“As children, we come to associate fall with going back to school, new school supplies, seeing friends. It’s exciting, for most. We still respond to this pattern that we experienced for 18 years,” Kathryn Lively, a sociology professor at Dartmouth University explained to the Huffington Post. It’s something ingrained in us from childhood.

Besides going back to school, fall is associated with a lot of special annual holidays, including Halloween and Thanksgiving. September is also the most popular month for births in the United States, which means plenty of people connect the start of fall with presents and birthday cake.

Related: Use This Map to Discover the Best Time to See the Leaves Change Color

StudyFinds.org also discusses a OnePoll that found the changing of the leaf colors is one of the main reasons fall is a fave, followed by that telltale chill in the air. Other big reasons? Getting ready for the holidays, making homemade soup and wearing bit sweaters all factor in.

Lively explained that the sociological basis for loving fall has to do with the fact that we view it as a comforting time of year. Fans of the Scandinavian “hygge” movement, which associates happiness and well-being with a cozy lifestyle, might also argue this idea. After all, what’s more hygge than sipping a PSL while snuggling with your tots?

I hear it all the time: parents flippantly calling their day care a “babysitter.” It irks me—silently eating away at the pride I carry in the work that I do.

You see, in my mind and heart, I am your child care provider, your child’s teacher. I’m the wiper of dirty faces and hugger of hurt feelings. I love and worry about your kid almost as much as you do. I know who has a poopy diaper by smell alone. I know your child’s favorite colors, songs, and funny little quirks.

I am not a babysitter. A sitter is the teenager who comes to watch movies, eat pizza, and put your kids to sleep so that you can enjoy a rare night off. She does less work and is paid more an hour per kid. She may make your kids laugh—but she won’t understand what brings joy to their hearts.

The truth is, I rarely sit—unless it’s with a baby snuggled in the safety of my arms while I feed him a freshly warmed bottle. Or because your child asked me to read Guess How Much I Love You for the 12th time today. (After all, we both know that lap sitting is the best way to listen to your favorite book.)

Most of the time, when you arrive during pick-up, I’m standing. I’m standing in the kitchen, washing a dish. I’m pulling a child off the furniture. I’m mediating an argument. I’m changing a diaper. A baby is probably slung on my back with my ever-essential Lillebaby and I’m guzzling the last dregs of my cold coffee. I may be found repeating (patiently, but with muzzled exasperation)“keep your hands to yourself” for the 10,000th time. My feet are unpolished, calloused, and aching. Chances are, I’ll be on them.

I will never be just your “sitter”—and here’s why. I am a provider. I provide comfort for boo-boos. I provide discipline, teaching your child right from wrong and showing them how to respect their friends. Together, they learn practical life skills, how to care for their environment (when they aren’t tearing everything apart in their play, because balance) and how to practice gentle hands when they get frustrated and hit a friend.

Related: An Open Letter to Parents… from Your Child’s Teacher

When the time comes, I potty-train them. We tie shoes, paint, and talk about shapes and colors. As babies, I help them learn to feed themselves. Every day, your kids are provided wholesome meals and a happy, clean(ish) home to spend their days in. When your children are in my care, they are stimulated. I provide them with sensory bins and paint, setting them up in situations where they learn problem-solving and build their vocabulary.

But most of all, I provide your child loveAnd as any parent who has ever had to leave their child with someone else knows, nothing is more vital to your conscience and your child’s development than being loved.

You see, being a child care provider is about so much more than passing the time with your child until you come to pick them up (although some days, it may feel like that). It’s not about finding a way to be at home with my own kids and still make money. 

I am a provider because I love kids. I am a provider because I love your kids. In my eyes, there is no job more vital than raising the next generation to be thoughtful, kind, brave, and confident.

A sitter is an insult to the care I feel for your children. Don’t get me wrong: I am not a replacement for you. No one will ever, ever replace mom. But we are a team, your family and mine. Our goal is to raise healthy, happy children—together.

Last year, one of my day care littles was baptized, and the family asked me to come to the baptism. Honored, I was so happy to go and sit with the family (who really feel like an extension of my own). But during the baptism, when they ushered me to the front, I stood with his Nana and sisters and cousins and aunts, because “You’re family, too.” I grinned awkwardly and inwardly danced with pride while I watched the little man be baptized.

After the service, their pastor introduced himself. “So, how are you related to the family?” he inquired, as his firm, wrinkled hands shook mine. That’s when my day care mom stepped in.

“Oh, well she’s our sitter—but she’s not. She’s so much more than that…sitter doesn’t really cover it, does it? She’s the one who raises our kids when I’m not there.” She knew, and I knew, how valuable we were to each other. How much I loved her children and how much she respected me for it. But that poor pastor’s face…

How do you explain the importance of the woman who helps raise your child? How do you explain the trust and bond between parent and provider? It’s not an easy choice, the decision to leave your child, for much of his or her day, in the care of someone else—particularly in the care of a stranger. It is, however, a decision that is made easier by the knowledge that you are leaving your child with a child care provider. And not just a “sitter.”

As a childcare provider, photographer and writer, I get motherhood: Feeling like you're doing too much, and not enough. Finding your identity somewhere between "I am woman, hear me roar" and "I am mom, hear me yell." I see you, I've been there. We are in it together.

It probably goes without saying that parents are always feeling proud of their kids for one reason or another, whether your son finished a difficult reading assignment or your daughter scored her first soccer goal. But just as important as their accomplishment is how you show your kids that feeling of pride. From words of advice to simple acts of kindness, here are 15 great ways parents can show their kids they are proud of them.

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1. Say "I'm proud of you." First and foremost, tell your kiddo you're proud of them when the time arises. You don't have to say this every day, but those words are encouragement are very meaningful to kids when they hear it from mom or dad.

2. Write them a note. Express pride by writing a little note or giving your little one a card or drawing that tells them you're proud of who they are as people or praises them for an accomplishment.

3. Talk about the obstacles. If your kid is struggling with an activity such as soccer or reading, offer support and recognize the obstacles he's facing.  At the same time, express your pride that your kiddo is facing those challenges.

4. Share some cookies. Nothing says love and pride like homemade chocolate chip cookies. Bake a batch of cookies and offer one to your son or daughter for being a great kid. Not a baker? Treat your kiddo to a cookie at the bakery counter at the grocery store instead.

5. Say you're proud in front of others. It's one thing if you tell your daughter you're proud of her. It's another when she hears you saying it to grandma or grandpa. Tell others how proud you are when your kids do something worthy of praise.

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6. Don't forget the small stuff. Of course, parents are proud when their son scores a goal or accomplishes a major milestone. But don't forget to show pride and offer words of encouragement when your kiddo does something small, such as help to set the table or read a book to her younger sibling.

7. Read a book to your kid about how you feel. Express pride through a children's book or story. After you finish reading the book, explain to your little one that the pride you feel is just like what the characters in the book feel.

8. Do an activity together. Show your kids how proud you are of them by participating in a family activity together. If your kids have been working on improving their physical activity, sign the family up for a 1-mile fun run and explain that it's a family reward.

9. Hug them. Showing affection is always a good thing. A hug not only expresses love but can also show your little one you're proud of them too.

10. Praise your son/daughter for the things they're working on. Recognize the process itself is an accomplishment. Tell your son you're proud of his work on accomplishing the larger goal still being worked on.

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11. Go to the park, a movie or an outing. If you want something more than words of encouragement, look for an activity to do together as a way to express pride. A trip to the park, movie or museum is a great expression of pride.

12. Tell them you're grateful to be their parent. We're proud of our kids for what they do, but make sure your little one knows you're also proud to be their parent, too.

13. Say "I believe in you." You've told your kiddo you're proud, but what about telling them you also believe in them and have confidence in their choices. That's a point of pride in itself.

14. Praise your kid for the great choices they make. Tell your little ones why you're proud of them by explaining how they've made good choices. Hearing that and the words of encouragement will only motivate them to continue their positive behavior.

15. Give a small gift. You don't want to make it a habit of expressing pride through gift-giving. But perhaps there's a special circumstance when your kid has been working hard on accomplishing a goal. When she reaches the goal, give her a small gift and tell her how proud you are.

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16. Let your kiddo decide what's for dinner. Maybe you have a picky eater at home who just went an entire week eating her veggies. Express your pride in that accomplishment by letting her pick the Friday night dinner.

17. Say "thank you." It's often these words of encouragement and daily conversations with our little ones that the greatest impact. Expressing thanks is just one way to share words of encouragement and pride.

18. Point out the positive in a negative situation. So often, we get too focused on the negative situations that occur every day. For every negative instance, try focusing on something positive your kiddo did and tell him you're proud of that.

19. Don't forget to be proud if they own up to their mistakes. Your son may have accidentally broke an item at home, but he told you what happened. It's okay to be upset about the broken object, but make sure to tell your son you're proud that he told the truth. This will make future confessions easier.

20. Hang the accomplishment on the fridge. If you're proud your kiddo did well on an exam or drew a pretty picture, display it proudly on the refrigerator or bulletin board for family and friends to see.

RELATED STORIES:
25 Things You Should Say to Your Kids Every Day
Your Daughter Needs to Hear You Say These 8 Things
14 Things I Want My Daughters to Know

 

No matter how old your kids are, threatening or upsetting news can affect them emotionally. Many can feel worried, frightened, angry, or even guilty. And these anxious feelings can last long after the news event is over. So what can you do as a parent to help your kids deal with all this information? Here are a few tips for talking to kids about tragedy in the news.

 

Addressing News and Current Events: Tips for All Kids

Consider your own reactions. Your kids will look to the way you handle the news to determine their own approach. If you stay calm and rational, they will, too.

Take action. Depending on the issue and kids’ ages, families can find ways to help those affected by the news. Kids can write postcards to politicians expressing their opinions; families can attend meetings or protests; kids can help assemble care packages or donate a portion of their allowance to a rescue/humanitarian effort. Check out websites that help kids do good.

 

Tips for Kids under 7

Keep the news away. Turn off the TV and radio news at the top of the hour and half hour. Read the newspaper out of range of young eyes that can be frightened by the pictures (kids may respond strongly to pictures of other kids in jeopardy). Preschool kids don’t need to see or hear about something that will only scare them silly, especially because they can easily confuse facts with fantasies or fears.

Stress that your family is safe. At this age, kids are most concerned with your safety and separation from you. Try not to minimize or discount their concerns and fears, but reassure them by explaining all the protective measures that exist to keep them safe. If the news event happened far away, you can use the distance to reassure kids. For kids who live in areas where crime and violence is a very real threat, any news account of violence may trigger extra fear. If that happens, share a few age-appropriate tips for staying and feeling safe (being with an adult, keeping away from any police activity).

Be together. Though it’s important to listen and not belittle their fears, distraction and physical comfort can go a long way. Snuggling up and watching something cheery or doing something fun together may be more effective than logical explanations about probabilities.

 

Tips for Kids 8–12

Carefully consider your child’s maturity and temperament. Many kids can handle a discussion of threatening events, but if your kids tend toward the sensitive side, be sure to keep them away from the TV news; repetitive images and stories can make dangers appear greater, more prevalent, and closer to home.

Be available for questions and conversation. At this age, many kids will see the morality of events in stark black-and-white terms and are in the process of developing their moral beliefs. You may have to explain the basics of prejudice, bias, and civil and religious strife. But be careful about making generalizations, since kids will take what you say to the bank. This is a good time to ask them what they know, since they’ll probably have gotten their information from friends, and you may have to correct facts.

Talk about — and filter — news coverage. You might explain that even news programs compete for viewers, which sometimes affects content decisions. If you let your kids use the Internet, go online with them. Some of the pictures posted are simply grisly. Monitor where your kids are going, and set your URLs to open to non-news-based portals.

 

Tips for Teens

Check inSince, in many instances, teens will have absorbed the news independently of you, talking with them can offer great insights into their developing politics and their senses of justice and morality. It will also help you get a sense of what they already know or have learned about the situation from their own social networks. It will also give you the opportunity to throw your own insights into the mix (just don’t dismiss theirs, since that will shut down the conversation immediately).

Let teens express themselves. Many teens will feel passionately about events and may even personalize them if someone they know has been directly affected. They’ll also probably be aware that their own lives could be affected by violence. Try to address their concerns without dismissing or minimizing them. If you disagree with media portrayals, explain why so your teens can separate the mediums through which they absorb news from the messages conveyed.

 

Additional resources

For more information on how to talk to your kids about a recent tragedy, please visit the National Association of School Psychologists or the American Psychological Association. For more on how news can impact kids, check out News and America’s Kids: How Young People Perceive and Are Impacted by the News,

Marie-Louise Mares, Associate Professor in the Department of Communication Arts at the University of Wisconsin-Madison, contributed to this article.

Common Sense Media
Tinybeans Voices Contributor

Common Sense Media is an independent nonprofit organization offering unbiased ratings and trusted advice to help families make smart media and technology choices. Check out our ratings and recommendations at www.commonsense.org.

March 14, aka 3.14 is officially Pi Day! If you are not sure how to explain “pi” to your kiddos, or if explaining it is met with blank stares, we’ve got the perfect way to make it interesting! Pie. Watch the video below to get a yummy tutorial on why circumference divided by diameter equals delicious.

 

 

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