ML Interest Tag: forgive

Why Kids Born in June Are More Social (& Other Fun Facts)

by Kipp Jarecke-Cheng

People born in June fall under both the Gemini or Cancer zodiac sign

If your kiddo was born in the sixth month of the year, you already know that people born in June are outgoing, charming, and creative. And even though they can be more than a handful sometimes, June babies tend to grow up to be healthy, cheerfully optimistic people. Discover more characteristics and fun facts about June babies, including exactly which precious gem is June’s birthstone.

people born in June
Nathan Dumlao on Unsplash

1. June people are healthier and more optimistic.
According to a study published in Heliyon, summer-born babies are more likely to grow up to be healthy adults. Researchers theorize that greater exposure to sunlight and higher vitamin D exposure leads to better overall well-being.

2. Summer people are expressive and quick-witted, but can also have a dark side.
Characteristics shared by many Geminis are sociability, excellent communication skills, and an always-ready-for-fun attitude. But like all Geminis who can possess two different personalities in one, June-born people can turn from fun-loving to super-serious and thoughtful without notice.

3. Most people born in June are Geminis, the social butterfly sign in the zodiac.
These quick-witted passionate people are comfortable talking to anyone about anything.

4. Imagination rules for June-born Geminis.
Thanks to their co-ruling planets, Venus and Uranus,  June-born Geminis rarely are at a loss for ideas. Their imaginations rule them and can always be counted on to devise clever solutions to even the most complex problems.

Mieke Campbell on Unsplash

4. Summer-born babies are happy ...
Science has found that the season of one’s birth can have a lifelong impact on moods, and babies born in the summer months—from June through August—are shown to be the least susceptible to sadness brought on by seasonal affective disorders.

5. June's birthstone is a pearl, which represents innocence and purity.

6. June babies are giving and forgiving.
Most people born in June fall under the sign of Gemini, which means they frequently see both sides of an argument. As a result, June-born people are forgiving and generous. Their Gemini-ness, however, means that they also can be indecisive.

8. There are plenty of celebrities with June birthdays.
People born in the sixth month of the year share their birth month with celebrities like Natalie Portman, Morgan Freeman, Meryl Streep, Kendrick Lamar, Anderson Cooper, Liam Neeson, Michael Cera, and more.

Related: Why Kids Born in May Often Have Wanderlust (& Other Interesting Facts)

 

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13 Fred Rogers Quotes about Kindness That We Need Now More Than Ever

by Kate Loweth

Some days we wish we could escape on a shiny red trolley to the Neighborhood of Make-believe, where a kind-hearted man in a zip-up sweater explains away all the scary things happening in the world. It’s a beautiful day in the neighborhood when you remember these important words of wisdom. Read on for some of our favorite Fred Rogers quotes about kindness, compassion and empathy.

1. Fred Rogers on Strength

mrrogersmovie via Instagram

"Most of us, I believe, admire strength. It's something we tend to respect in others, desire for ourselves, and wish for our children. Sometimes, though, I wonder if we confuse strength and other words--like aggression and even violence. Real strength is neither male nor female; but is, quite simply, one of the finest characteristics that any human being can possess."

2. Fred Rogers on Important Historical Events

Dr. François S. Clemmons via Wikimedia Commons

"A high school student wrote to ask, 'What was the greatest event in American history?' I can't say. However, I suspect that like so many 'great' events, it was something very simple and very quiet with little or no fanfare (such as someone forgiving someone else for a deep hurt that eventually changed the course of history). The really important 'great' things are never center stage of life's dramas; they're always 'in the wings.' That's why it's so essential for us to be mindful of the humble and the deep rather than the flashy and the superficial."

3. Fred Rogers on Humankind

"One of the greatest dignities of humankind is that each successive generation is invested in the welfare of each new generation."

4. Fred Rogers on Forgiveness

"Forgiveness is a strange thing. It can sometimes be easier to forgive our enemies than our friends. It can be hardest of all to forgive people we love. Like all of life's important coping skills, the ability to forgive and the capacity to let go of resentments most likely take root very early in our lives."

5. Fred Rogers on Sharing Responsibility

"We live in a world in which we need to share responsibility. It's easy to say, 'It's not my child, not my community, not my world, not my problem.' Then there are those who see the need and respond. I consider those people my heroes."

6. Fred Rogers on Seeing Scary Things on the News

"When I was a boy and I would see scary things in the news, my mother would say to me, 'Look for the helpers. You will always find people who are helping.' To this day, especially in times of 'disaster,' I remember my mother's words, and I am always comforted by realizing that there are still so many helpers--so many caring people in this world."

7. Fred Rogers on Saying "Yes"

"I hope you're proud of yourself for the times you've said 'yes,' when all it meant was extra work for you and was seemingly helpful only to somebody else."

8. Fred Rogers on Embracing Our Feelings

"There's no 'should' or 'should not' when it comes to having feelings. They're part of who we are and their origins are beyond our control. When we can believe that, we may find it easier to make constructive choices about what to do with those feelings."

9. Fred Rogers on Facing Sadness & Anger

"Confronting our feelings and giving them appropriate expression always takes strength, not weakness. It takes strength to acknowledge our anger, and sometimes more strength yet to curb the aggressive urges anger may bring and to channel them into nonviolent outlets. It takes strength to face our sadness and to grieve and to let our grief and our anger flow in tears when they need to. It takes strength to talk about our feelings and to reach out for help and comfort when we need it."

10. Fred Rogers on What Makes Us Special

"As human beings, our job in life is to help people realize how rare and valuable each one of us really is, that each of us has something that no one else has—or ever will have—something inside that is unique to all time. It's our job to encourage each other to discover that uniqueness and to provide ways of developing its expression."

11. Fred Rogers on Love

"Love isn’t a state of perfect caring. It is an active noun like struggle. To love someone is to strive to accept that person exactly the way he or she is, right here and now."

12. Fred Rogers on Being True to Yourself

"One of the greatest gifts you can give anybody is the gift of your honest self. I also believe that kids can spot a phony a mile away."

13. Fred Rogers on What Matters Most

"What matters isn't how a person's inner life finally puts together the alphabet and numbers of his outer life. What really matters is whether he uses the alphabet for the declaration of a war or the description of a sunrise--his numbers for the final count at Buchenwald or the specifics of a brand-new bridge."

Now head out into the world and make a snappy new day for yourself.

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Perfect Parenting Is Being Able to Forgive

By Angela Rainbolt

Have you forgiven yourself? Yes, you read that correctly. Have you forgiven yourself? We are human beings, and we make mistakes. Somehow or another, parent status is synonymous with perfection. We expect it from others, especially now in the digital age, and we expect it from ourselves. We portray images online and cry in private. I am just 13 days away from entering my 30th year of parenting and I can tell you that perfect is not how I would describe those years. They were perfectly broken. They were perfectly difficult. They were perfectly dysfunctional. I think you are starting to understand.

My oldest daughter, who will be 29 in a couple of weeks, has chosen to not talk to me or her sisters for a year and a half now. Mental health issues have been a steady theme in our lives. By the time I found out that I was pregnant with her, I had thought about suicide more times than I care to count, had taken drugs, had drank until I puked, had stayed out all night, had slept with too many guys, flunked out of my freshman year of college, and the list of poor choices goes on. I was looking for validation. I needed someone to make me feel like I was okay. I needed to feel like my presence mattered. I thought having my daughter would change things. I thought that she would give me everything I was looking for. I was scared as hell, but in my young mind I couldn’t come to any other decision but to continue with the pregnancy. 

They say that hindsight is 20/20 but even now I don’t think I know what the right choice was. Perhaps keeping her helped me stay away from some damaging behaviors but not all of them. I continued to use alcohol for many years. I went out at nights trying to find fun and excitement. I had men in and out of my life. I failed at getting my college degree. I quit jobs when things got hard or I didn’t know how to resolve issues. I have thought about the alternatives. But there is not another person that could love her more than I did and do. However, I was broken. Right now, I am, at best, refurbished.

I think about those years more than you could even imagine that I do. I could never find peace and admonished myself many nights in the dark when I was trying to sleep. Once my daughter became an adult, she seemed to get more adjusted as time went on. She was finding her stride and told me thank you many times. I mentioned several times that I was happy that she still loved me. I would tell her this because it was truly how I felt, and I knew that if she could still love me after everything I put her through that maybe I could find a way to forgive myself. In the last few years, I started to allow myself to heal and forgive myself for everything: the poor choices, the yelling, the lack of guidance, the physical punishments, etc. Everything changed this year when you spoke about your recent diagnoses. That telephone conversation brought everything back and the doubt and self-punishment crept back in. This was closely followed by another conversation where you asked me questions that I knew would come someday. Questions that could have been asked a dozen times over the last ten years. 

It is impossible for us to do better until we know better. It really wasn’t until a few years ago that my mind started to get better. I took control of my depression and anxiety. I started walking every day and allowing myself to get in my thoughts and resolve how I felt about my life. I started to lose weight and gain a smile. I started to get more active in my community. I joined the booster club associated with my daughter’s basketball team, made friends, and eventually started to feel like a good person. This was a stark difference to all the parenting years beforehand. I was never involved. I didn’t go to school events and, most of the time, would try to talk my kids out of taking part in things that would require me doing so. My oldest daughter had ADHD and that, combined with my own mental health issues, just made it nearly impossible for me to be an active parent. I was always exhausted, sad, and angry.

And part of the process of knowing better and moving forward is the process of forgiveness. Forgiveness is a process and is never over. We will, most likely, need to continue forgiving ourselves for years to come. I know that I am. Allow yourself to go down the road of forgiveness and you will find yourself in the glorious world of the chaotic perfection that is parenting. I ask you again, have you forgiven yourself? 

I am a single mom of three beautiful daughters ages 29, 20, and 15.  At 50, I am recently divorced and making a career change.  I'm trying to put my BA and my MA to use finally!  My life hasn't always been easy but I feel good about the future!

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How to Stay Sane While Caring for a Toddler

By Flow Belinsky

Photo: Canva Stock Photo

Ah yes, the toddler phase. Once the sweet yet exhausting infant days are over, the toddler years rush in. There may be a few months in-between of sweet and easy limbo, but once babies grow into full-blown toddlers, the challenges begin anew. 

Dealing with a toddler on a daily basis is no easy feat. Sure, they are adorable, and the rate they learn is astonishing and exciting. But tantrums, constant activity, running, strong little opinions, need for entertainment, all that talking and endless needs can really wear on a parent’s nerves.

It is really important for caregivers to care for themselves, too, especially in the toddler years. Below you will find a list of five ways you can stay sane and balanced while caring for a toddler. This list includes both things to do as well as ways to be to keep your mind centered, your nervous system more relaxed and your perspective healthy.

1. Cultivate Presence in the Moment: It is easy to get carried away by a toddler’s energy and activities. One minute they are destroying a lego mansion and the next they are running down the street with no pants on. If you as a caregiver are not able to maintain your sense of self and presence, you will get taken for a ride, frazzled, anxious and worn out.

A helpful way to cultivate more presence while care-taking is to bring part of your attention back to yourself and your own body, even while you are looking out for them. In times of relative calm, this split attention is possible and so helpful for cultivating a sense of peace within. 

Some tools you can use to do this include body and breath awareness. Feel your feet on the ground, notice your steps, notice your weight on the earth, notice how the ground feels beneath you. This will ground you and center your awareness back into your own body. Another way is to notice your breath and breathe deeper or focus on the exhale to calm anxiety. One example of this is to inhale for 4 counts and exhale for 8 counts. Repeat as many times as necessary.

These simple yet profound practices will help you to feel more sane and centered while caring for a toddler.

2. Meditate during Nap Time or When You Have Breaks: I know this one is hard for most people, myself included at times. It is so tempting to do something else during downtimes to get things done or to just veg out. But, instead of scrolling on Instagram, making endless to-do lists or scrambling to clean the kitchen, spend that precious quiet time really resourcing yourself with the practice of mindfulness meditation so that when the tornado starts again you are in a calm and balanced place. You can scroll and make lists later. If you don’t know how to meditate, invest a little time and energy into a mindfulness meditation course, many of which can be found online. You will be amazed at how much this simple and ancient practice will enhance your life and sanity.

3. Regularly Schedule in Alone Time: The next important part of keeping your cool while care-taking a toddler is to take quality time off as often as you can. Find a sitter or enlist dad, another family member or friend to be with the kids once a week or a few times a month. Don’t just wait until you are at an emergency state of freak-out in order to get some time off. Plan ahead and do it often, even when you feel like a super mom that can handle anything.

During your alone time, do things that truly nourish you. Don’t go shopping at Target or clean during that time. Don’t go to a class either. You can do that another time. Spend this special time really cultivating your relationship with yourself, your own body, breath, and mind-space. Go on a nature walk. Meditate. Go for a swim. Read a book by the ocean or in a forest. Write in your journal. Do a solo yoga practice at the park. Walk the urban streets aimlessly and take in the culture, people and vibes. Whatever makes you feel alive, fueled up, chilled out and like yourself. 

Even if you have to hire a sitter, do it. It will help you keep your sanity and a more joyful perspective when you are with your kid and doing your mom duties day after day.

4. Be Flexible: When caring for a toddler, especially when trying to do something outside of the house, things will not go as you plan. Expect this. Let go of expectations around when, where and how. Be forgiving of yourself if you miss playdates or are late, and ask that your friends or hosts be forgiving as well. Bring snacks wherever you go, and be open to a change of plans like an impromptu snack picnic on the sidewalk or a stop at the swings at the park on the way to the restaurant. The more relaxed you can be about your plans and accomplishments for the day with a toddler, the more fun you both will have, and the less stressed out you will be. The saying “go with the flow,” is so relevant to toddler care-taking. 

5. Be Compassionate with Yourself: This is perhaps the most important step. Cultivating a sense of self-compassion creates real mental health and wellbeing, especially as a parent. And, often, it is so hard to do. But, learning to be nice to yourself in your own head, even when things aren’t going well, will help you feel sane and balanced, even on the hard days.

If you lose your temper, that’s ok. If you don’t even get out of the house all day, that’s ok. If everything is still a mess when you go to sleep, that’s ok. Caring for a toddler is chaos sometimes, and really hard. If you find yourself yelling back at them sometimes, even though you read in all the parenting books that you’re not supposed to do that, it’s ok. None of that makes you a bad mom or a bad person. 

Be easy on yourself during these toddler years. Let things be messy, let yourself make mistakes, and let it not mean anything about you as a person. You are human, with your own feelings and with so much else to manage. Cut yourself slack, be kind to yourself in your own head, forgive yourself when things go awry, and remind yourself always that you are doing the best that you can.

The toddler years will pass in time, and the next challenging phase will begin. So learn to master these tools to care for your own inner peace, and it will pay off for the rest of your life. Take time off, cultivate your presence, be flexible, be compassionate with yourself and learn to truly nourish yourself when you have quiet moments, and you will be well on the road to truly maintaining your sanity and balance even while caring for toddlers.

 

 

Flow is an Author and Memoir Writing Coach for Womxn. Feeling the call to write your true life story into a book that inspires? Sign up to join a Free Memoir Writing Breakthrough Workshop through her website, and get the clarity and momentum you need to make it happen.

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The Power of Forgiveness

By Chris Parsons

It’s funny what kids can teach you. Recently, a good friend of mine told me a story about a problem his daughter was having with one of her friends. She told him how upset she was because her friend had said something mean to her, and the comment, according to his daughter, was unforgivable.

But then, my friend said, he watched as his daughter reflected about what she just said to him. She shook her head and said, “No, that’s not right. I still want to be friends with her.”

She proceeded to tell him she would forgive her friend in the end. His daughter said she could see herself making the same mistake her friend did. And besides, she noted, their friendship would become stronger because of what happened.

He told me how astonished he was watching the whole scene play out in front of him, and he wondered aloud how could a child show so much empathy?

Afterward, it got me to thinking the world would be a much better place if we all could show more empathy and forgiveness in our lives. And maybe, if we taught our children to be more forgiving, then maybe we could be more forgiving ourselves.

To Forgive Others, First Forgive Yourself

We are often our own worst critics, especially children. How often have you heard your child say to themselves, “I’m not good at this” or “this is too hard for me”?

Maybe the first step in teaching the value of forgiveness to is to teach our children to forgive themselves. If we’re angry with ourselves, then it shouldn’t come as a surprise when that anger and resentment comes pouring out at those around us.

The awesomeness of teaching your child to forgive themselves is that it instills in them a self-confidence that allows them to project a kindness onto others.

With young children (ages 4-6), it’s important we start to build this foundation early. We can do so by sitting and reading picture books with our child that demonstrate the value of love and understanding. Dr. Seuss’s Horton Hears a Who! is wonderful example of a story showing how every being brings value to this world.

Even with older children, the power of story is a valuable tool in teaching life lessons, including forgiveness. There are countless examples of stories with powerful messages. Encourage your child to read such stories.

Teach by Example

Like it or not, your child watches you carefully and takes cues from your behavior. What better way to teach forgiveness then to demonstrate it regularly with your spouse or the rest of your family. Openly ask for forgiveness from your spouse and be sure to extend it when your spouse asks for it.

These lessons can apply to spouses, between you and your kids, and between siblings. I’m not sure about you, but my kids bicker regularly, which provides countless opportunities to practice the principles of forgiveness.

An important key is to ensure the forgiveness is genuine. Our children are more insightful than you would think. Forgiveness shouldn’t be forced. Allow time for everyone to cool off if it’s necessary. If days are required, then days are what it takes. Nothing will be resolved if forgiveness is forced.

And through your actions, teach that forgiveness is not conditional. Teach that forgiveness does not have to be reciprocated. Yes, for reconciliation to occur, two people must come together. But at the very least, teach that it’s ok to forgive even if the other person does not.

When the fight is between siblings, it’s the perfect opportunity to teach the value of understanding the other person’s point of view. Discuss each person’s perspective openly to build understanding. Allow your child to witness how it’s easier to resolve disagreements when you know the other’s side of the story. These opportunities are an excellent time to teach the importance of treating others as we wish to be treated ourselves.

Finally, use family gatherings periodically—like during a mealtime once a week, for example—to discuss the matter, including how easy or hard it is to forgive, how it feels, and what it means.

Mistakes Are a Part of Life

Everyone makes mistakes. It’s important that kids understand that. Children make mistakes. Mom and Dad make mistakes. We are human. Making a mistake is a part of life, but a mistake does not define who you are. Forgiveness reinforces that idea.

Conflict is inevitable, especially among families, so teaching and learning these lessons early are crucial to raising children who respect the value of peace, compassion, and civility. But every journey begins with a single step. Teach by example. Practice forgiveness in your own life. Share those moments. Let your children watch and learn. It’s not an overstatement to believe these small steps can lead to a more peaceful and productive society.

Chris Parsons grew up in Flatrock, Newfoundland. After many years of telling his stories, he published his first book "A Little Spark" in October 2020. The book is a fully illustrated chapter book - complete with a Soundtrack and Audiobook. The book recently received the Mom's Choice Gold Medal. He resides in Dallas.

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Date Night In: 9 Maternity Looks You’ll Love

by Aimee Della Bitta

Yes, you may be spending more time at home than ever before, but that doesn’t mean you need to say goodbye to date nights. Setting the mood to connect with your partner without leaving the house takes a little creativity but is so worth it. Light a few candles, dab on your favorite perfume, try these date-night suggestions, and slip into one of these 10 maternity looks to instantly feel inspired for a fun, romantic date night in.

Asymmetric Black Sweatshirt Dress

Etsy shop One Mug A Day Store

Who says sweats can't be fashionable? This asymmetrical sweatshirt dress is super stylish and crazy comfortable. Throw on your favorite dangle earrings and your coziest slippers and your date-at-home outfit is complete. 

Available at etsy.com, $68.70.

MAMA Ribbed Pants

H&M

These wide-legged ribbed pants with matching top from H&M hit the mark for a pulled together comfortable look. Pro tip: This is a great outfit for a spa-themed date night in. Face masks and chocolate covered strawberries for two, please!

Available at hm.com, $29.99.

Long Sleeve Fitted Maternity Dress

Ingrid & Isabel

Slip on this buttery soft knit dress, order take-out from your favorite restaurant, and try eating anyplace other than the dinner table turned work-from-home desk you've been staring at all week. We promise, you'll feel like you're out on the town! This confidence-boosting Ingrid & Isabel dress stretches to the perfect fit at every stage of pregnancy.

Available at ingridandisabel,com, $98.

Love Struck Sweater

Loft

Let your outfit do the talking. This adorable Love Struck sweater from Loft will let your partner know you're still very much head over heals in love. 

Available at loft.com, $74.50.

The Cashmere Sleeper Set

HATCH

The best thing about a date night at home is you can wear anything that feels good, even if it's your favorite cashmere sleeper set. This one from Hatch ranks high on the list for both comfort and style. 

Available at hatchcollection.com, $238.

The Column Dress

The Great Website

Looking for non-maternity dresses you can rock your whole pregnancy? Meet the Column Dress from The Great. It's relaxed through the body with slightly billowed sleeves. Slip it on for your next date night in and smile knowing you'll happily be wearing it for years to come. 

Available at thisisthegreat.com, $195.

Caftan

Dwell and Slumber Website

It's the workhorse of any pregnancy wardrobe—the caftan. This original dress from Dwell and Slumber is comfy, flattering and forgiving on all shapes and sizes. The transitional design will fit you through all four trimesters and all stages of life. Wear it to date night in now, and out on the town when the time is right. 

Available at dwellandslumber.com, $62.

Jumpsuit

Bloomaire Website

This wide-leg jumpsuit is a favorite among mamas! With no back zipper, it's easy to slip on, and the added elastic back waistband offers a forgiving fit. It's polished enough for the office but comfortable enough for dates at home. 

Available at bloomaire.com, $182.

Maternity Leggings

Storq Website

No list is complete without the perfect maternity legging. Swap out the stained sweatpants you've been wearing during Zoom calls for these chic leggings from Storq. You'll instantly feel pulled together and ready for date night with your sweetheart. 

Available at storq.com, $65.

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8 New Parent Date Night Ideas Right at Home

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Anook Athletics Releases New Styles for Pregnant & New Moms

by Erin Lem

From your 20-week ultrasound to chasing a tottling toddler, your body has gone through incredible changes in such a short time. Celebrate those changes—and everything you’ve accomplished as a new mama—with clothes that make you look and feel your best. Anook Athletics, the covet-worthy athletic wear brand for pre- and postpartum moms features a line of high-quality, versatile styles that will take you from first trimester and beyond. They just released their new line of styles and we got the scoop below.

How Anook Athletics Is Different
We’ll just come out and say it: This brand lives up to the hype. While many maternity collections promise quality goods that you’ll be able to wear beyond pregnancy, Anook Athletics actually delivers. We specifically tested the Poppy Leggings and Nila bra and here’s what we loved:

• Most maternity activewear leggings we’ve worn just don’t have that glove-like fit we’re used to with our fave non-pregnancy leggings. We’re either pulling up the belly band or adjusting it every few minutes so it gives us the coverage we need. Anook Athletics has it all figured out. Once you put on the leggings, they fit perfectly over every bump and curve—the material feels giving enough for a growing bump and supportive enough to last once baby arrives. The fabric is forgiving, but so well made it won’t stretch out.

• The Nila Bra is comfortable and stylish enough to wear even when not nursing. But if you are, the clips—which you can easily maneuver one-handed—allow for easy access.

• We love supporting mom-founded brands whose mission we can get behind. Founded by Allie Lindenmuth, an Austin-based prenatal yoga teacher and mom, Anook Athletics is all about empowering women through life’s biggest changes and challenges. Their styles are not trendy or cutesy but designed to be realistic to what pregnant and new moms experience, both emotionally and physically.

And, while it’s fair to consider the prices spendy, you’re investing in styles you’ll wear way beyond the pregnancy and infant months.

Styles You’ll Find in the New Collection Released September 2020:

 

Ellie 23" Crop Leggings ($98)

Busy moms know you can never have too many pockets. Their new Ellie Crop Legging just gets you. It features a pocket to store your valuables and flat seams and a sleek silhouette to make you feel extra confident pre- or post-baby. This style is available in Stone Heather and Char Heather. Buy it here. 

 

 

 

 

Birdie Skort ($78)

If you're on the move turn to this cute but comfortable Skort that boasts breathable fabric, an antimicrobial lining, power mesh side panels and of course, those much-needed pockets. Choose from Pacific, Char, Moss, Redwood and Stone. Buy it here. 

 

 

 

Devyn Muscle Tee ($68)

Chances are you're looking for just that perfect tee you can wear from morning to night. Good news: we've found it. The new Devyn Muscle Tee is the staple you've been looking for. It'll wick away moisture using Dri-Release® fabric and is soft enough for nursing and durable enough for a workout. Buy it here. 

 

Georgia Jacket ($179)

Cooler months require clothes that you can layer, stay warm in and feel comfortable toting around baby and chasing after a toddler (yep, we're speaking from experience). This jacket will do all of that and more. It's made with a four-way stretch and quilted front panels that hugs your body in just the right places. Product launching in late October. 

 

 

 

Additional Styles to Shop:

When Anook Athletics launched last year we were lucky enough to check out their inaugural collection. We broke it down for you below:

• Poppy Tall and Short Leggings ($98) – Available in tall (28.5”) and short (26”), these leggings come in Heathered Char or Heathered Stone. Both colors and lengths feature a waistline power mesh that won’t have you pulling or adjusting the belly band every five minutes. It’s supportive and giving enough for a growing bump and offers compression after baby is born. The extra-wide gusset with antimicrobial liner offers ventilation, and the moisture management knit material wicks away sweat. Buy here. 

• Hayes Tall and Short Joggers ($98) – For a more lounge-like fit, turn to these joggers that also come in tall (27”) and short lengths (24.5”). Both include extra ventilation and are soft and stretchy enough to accommodate a growing bump and postpartum body types. Choose from Heathered Char or Heathered Stone. Buy here.

• Austin Shorts ($58) – The prenatal activewear scene was sorely missing shorts…until now. These shorts boast a four-way stretch, antimicrobial lining and are forgiving enough that the waistband will expand and contract to whatever size and shape you currently hold. Available in four colors. Buy here. 

• Nila Bra ($58) – Ever wish your fave sports bra doubled as a nursing bra? Your wish came true with this nursing-friendly sports bra that offers padded coverage and hidden nursing clips. The bra is comfortable enough to wear all day (we tested this out ourselves) and is stylish enough to wear even when you’re not nursing. Available in all four colorways. Buy here. 

• Tank ($62) – Comfortable enough to wear around the house or to yoga class, this tank is sweat-wicking and includes hidden nursing clips and a padded bra. Choose from four colors. Buy here. 

 

All styles are available at anookathletics.com.

 

—Erin Lem

Photos: Anook Athletics

 

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4 Agreements Every Rockstar Parent Should Make with Themselves

By Shelby Spear

Photo: Rawpixel

Books are my spirit animal. Well, maybe dragonflies, but anything bound and full of inspiration and insight runs a close second in stirring my soul. While many of us in the book lover club have read hundreds upon hundreds of amazing works, we usually sink our heart into a few favorites.

One of my all-time cherished books, which I recommend to anyone willing to listen, is The Four Agreements, by Don Miguel Ruiz. This little gem is only 138 pages, but every word awakens the spirit and makes you think. You come to a certain knowing with each agreement listed, nodding your head in affirmation of a spoken truth.

Don Miguel Ruiz shares how making only four agreements with yourself and the universe can unfold and unfurl the bound-up version of self and lead you back to your authentic identity and purpose. Doing so awards you the freedom to live from a place of wholeness.

Regardless of your worldview or spiritual beliefs/non-belief, these four agreements make sense because they’re universal truths any of us can and want to live out. No matter who I recommend this book to, no matter what they believe beyond the here and now, the wisdom shared within The Four Agreements resonates.

1. Be impeccable with your word.

All we need do is look at Twitter for 30 seconds to realize how often this agreement finds rejection. Words matter. They can cause irreparable damage and instill lasting hope. This world is in dire need of the latter.

2. Don’t take things personally.

Who doesn’t do this? And how is it working out for us? The rampant “everything is about me” mentality is causing widespread disconnect and detachment.

3. Don’t make assumptions.

We live in a world that functions on assumption more than fact. Headlines and gossip have become the basis for judgment. In large part because communication, which requires listening, discerning, studying, has become a lost art.

4. Do your best.

Every human can start doing this right now. Doing our best is enough, even if some days our finest hour is a complete mess or failure. Doing our best includes accepting and forgiving ourselves and others for collective weaknesses and faults.

As common sense as these agreements sound, we’ve all fallen into the trap of living outside their boundaries. The human thing, ego thing, illusion thing, is hard. But continued resistance to these positive commitments means more misery, suffering and dysfunction will exist. The good news is, a mindful decision to enter into these agreements—the best we can—will change the world around us. Instantly.

Consider just one example: if you decide not to take your coworkers comment personally today, then your time home with the family after work will be pleasant and enjoyable. This in turn makes for a stress-free evening for your spouse and kids. The lack of tension helps everyone have a good night’s rest. And, come morning, each person in your family starts a new day feeling refreshed, joyful and ready to face the world.

In this scenario, agreeing to not take things personally in one single instance affects the entirety of your experience going forward, including all the people in your sphere of influence. One agreement by one individual in one moment of time has the power to change countless lives via the ripple effect.

The four agreements Don Miguel Ruiz challenges us to embody are powerful, important, healing. My commitment to practicing them has changed my life, my family, the people around me.

Although I’m just one person making a small difference in a limited space, together we can make a significant difference in an ever-expanding space. Humanity deserves the healing.

This post originally appeared on Thrive Global.

A self-described “sappy soul whisperer/sarcasm aficionado,” Shelby is a wife of 27 years & mom of three millennials. She co-authored How Are You Feeling, Momma? (You don't need to say, "I'm fine.") Her stories are in print at Guideposts, online at sites like Her View From Home and Parenting Teens & Tweens, and at shelbyspear.com. Get 3 FREE chapters of Shelby's book

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Quick & Easy Ways to Be a Better Environmentalist

By Marianna Sachse

“We don’t need a handful of people doing zero waste perfectly. We need a million people doing it imperfectly.” –Anne-Marie Bonneau

We all have those days when we look in the fridge or the recycling bin and see all the waste and think, “I’m a crappy environmentalist.” We aspire to be better and greener, but then real life happens, everything gets hard, and you make the easy (and often wasteful) choice. But, we can reset and take action by embracing the small changes. Here are my favorite ways to get back in the eco-grove when you’ve gone astray.

1. Ditch the car (including Uber and Lyft!) for just one extra trip. Walk or bike where you need to go. Sometimes you’ll be surprised that things aren’t as far away as you feel like they are (especially if you live in a city.)
2. Air dry a load of laundry. Need guidance on how to move to more air drying? We’ve got a guide for you on easy ways to do this.
3. Bring the bags. Always forgetting to bring your grocery bags? Stash a couple in your bike, handbag, or the car. Take the step to make sure they are always on you. And better yet, bring small bags for produce and bread as well.
4. Take a cooler shower. Sometimes it is just refreshing to take a cooler shower. Plus, it is better for your skin. So turn the temp down a few degrees the next time you are washing up.
5. Adjust the temperature in your home. Air conditioning is one of the most frightening feedback loops of climate change. The warmer it is, the more we will use. The more we use, the warmer it will get. Let your home be a few degrees warmer, it most likely won’t be noticeable. If you have a whole-house dehumidifier attached to your AC unit, run the fan without the AC (often it is humidity that makes homes feel hot.) And if you can, install a smart thermostat. Close the blinds at the hottest times of the day, and open those windows wide as it cools off.
6. Borrow the thing. Next time you feel like you need to buy something for short-term use, see if you can borrow it locally. Ask a friend or find a local Library of Things. If you can’t borrow it, see if you can buy it second hand.
7. Shop locally. Supporting your neighborhood store means more efficient and carbon-friendly delivery and it keeps neighborhoods vibrant. Find the independent boutique that sells thoughtfully and responsibly made products, and support them (if it is something you truly need!)
8. Take action. Join the #ClimateStrike, teach your children, and talk to your employer about how you can make change together. Call your politicians and tell them that action on climate change is critical, right now!

With a little grace and humility you can return to the habits that we all need to be embracing for a cooler planet. I try to be forgiving of myself and understanding of my own limitations, and then recommit to the change I want to see. It is an imperfect action, but it is action. And if we are all doing this regularly, it will be the change we need.

This post originally appeared on Jackalo.

Marianna Sachse is the founder of Jackalo—a line of long-lasting and organic children’s clothes that accepts all of the used clothes back to be repaired and resold or responsibly recycled, reducing the environmental impact our kids' clothes have. She is a mother of two active kids and a maker.

 
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How Parents Step Back & Create Harmony When They’re Feeling Overwhelmed

By Dr. Bradley Nelson

One of the best things about being parents of young children is the time you get to spend playing with them and having fun. There’s nothing like that first trip to the park to try out the bike with the training wheels, unless it’s when you go back a while later to take the training wheels off and see your little guy or girl racing the wind.

They say having young kids keeps us young and playing with your kids is one of life’s great joys. At the same time, having little ones can be exhausting. You have all the responsibility of providing for a family along with everything you were doing before becoming parents. It’s not unusual to feel stress, even during fun times—like those (supposedly) relaxing family vacations!

When you feel tired, exhausted or overwhelmed, whatever emotions you have been carrying around can boil over with your spouse and kids. Emotional drama can sweep through a family faster than the sniffles kids bring home from school.

When tempers flare, there’s usually more going on than the words or behaviors that seem to trigger the disagreement. More often than not, there are unresolved feelings from previous difficult or hurtful experiences lurking beneath the surface—what I call trapped emotions.

­People frequently sense that they are burdened by emotions from their past, but they don’t know how to get over them. Trapped emotions can damage family relationships and lead to anxiety, depression and a host of physical, emotional and psychological problems.

Something that commonly occurs in family relationships is feeling triggered: when you become overly upset, emotional or defensive in certain situations. When this happens, usually there are underlying feelings contributing to the emotions you are feeling. Emotional baggage from past traumas (and perhaps inherited from earlier generations) can make us more likely to feel certain negative emotions such as anxiety, anger, disappointment, frustration and sadness.

Fortunately, there are simple steps you can take to help you better handle daily stress and disagreements, become more accepting and forgiving and bring more joy and harmony to your family life. Here are a few:

Discover what’s behind your own triggers.

When you find yourself feeling upset, overly emotional or defensive about something a family member says or does, you are most likely feeling the effect of old trapped emotions as well as the ones that come up in the moment.

Establish boundaries.

If you have a family member who leaves you feeling drained and upset, the best way to protect yourself is to create boundaries. You can decide in advance what you will and will not tolerate. Whatever boundaries you create, you need to stick with them and respect yourself, even if the other person doesn’t.

Feeling beat up? Disengage.

It takes two people to have an argument. You can always just turn around and leave. One of the things you can say in this situation is “I love you, but I need to honor myself by leaving.”

Make strategies for better family interactions.

Consider your past interactions with difficult people and how they normally act. Do they have frequent outbursts? Do they complain a lot? Are they unpredictable? Then come up with a plan. Decide in advance how you are going to act and react when that person misbehaves.

Practice acceptance and love.

Look for the good in people. This is especially important with children, who tend to live up to our expectations of them. If you are looking for positive things, you are more likely to find them. You’ll be less likely to blow up—and blow things out of proportion—when something rubs you the wrong way.

Forgive

In any disagreement, forgiveness begins with letting go. If you have trouble forgiving, seek for the divine and ask for help in prayer. Look for ways to see the person who offended you in a positive light. You might focus on something you love about them. Forgiveness brings freedom and peace for you and for your family.

Our families are a place where we can learn and practice healthy ways of recognizing, acknowledging and expressing emotions. No one is perfect. But by being more intentional about choosing how we act and react in emotional situations, we can give our kids skills that will help them grow into emotionally healthy adults.

Dr. Bradley Nelson
Tinybeans Voices Contributor

Veteran holistic physician and author of The Emotion Code, Dr. Bradley Nelson is an expert in the emerging fields of Bioenergetic Medicine and Energy Psychology. He has certified thousands of practitioners worldwide in helping people overcome unresolved anger, depression, anxiety, loneliness and other negative emotions and the physical symptoms associated them.

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