ML Interest Tag: physical-therapy

13 Boston Moms You Should Be Following on Instagram

by Allison Sutcliffe

Looking for a little Insta inspiration this summer? Ideas to get you out and about, exploring local attractions and little known spots? What better place to find ideas that go beyond the everyday than by following Boston influencers. Check out these Boston Instagram moms who are sharing everything from breastfeeding and sleep tricks to travel ideas and cool Boston spots that are worth a look. So grab your phones and get following. These moms have got what you need to find amazing new adventures with the kids this summer.

@domestikateblog

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Look to Boston mama Kate Bowler for entertaining inspiration of all sorts. Not only can she help anyone set the scene for a fabu family summer soiree, but she also shares reading lists, gardening tips and fun vacation ideas for New England families.

IG: @domestikateblog

@notquiteknockedup

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Fertility issues and a growing family are front and center of this honest Insta account where Colleen posts heartfelt quotes that make parents (and people hoping to be parents) feel heard, alongside cute pics of her kids.

IG: @notquiteknockedup

@pragmaticmom

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Bookworms of all ages can follow this account to find great new titles that focus on multicultural children's books. Live author events, books giveaways and more are all part of the experience.

IG: @pragmaticmom

@drchristinekoh

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Neuroscientist turned multimedia creative, Christine Koh posts about balancing work and life with absolute honesty. This Boston mom does it all. She's a writer, speaker, podcaster and Editor of Boston Mamas, too. 

IG: @drchristinekoh

@muchomasseblog

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Katricia is a mom of three, and we love following her family's adventures in Boston and beyond. But one of the best parts of her feed has got to be her shout outs to her husband and her creative baking ideas.

IG: @muchomasseblog

@nurturebynaps

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These two powerhouse mamas are both registered nurses, and they set up Boston NAPS to guide moms through pregnancy and beyond. You'll find their IG page full of tips and tricks for new moms and super helpful classes like pre-baby bootcamp. 

IG: @nurturebynaps

@sarahfit

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We love following Sarah Dussault for her fitness tips and glimpses into mothering three kids. Her blog has loads of pregnancy and postpartum info, and her fitness videos are the perfect way to exercise when you literally only have 10 minutes. 

IG: @sarahfit

@blovedboston

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Biana is a lifestyle blogger and mommy to Sophia and baby Mason who shares her life with us over on Instagram. You can also follow her wedding planning business at @bespokebostonweddings.

IG: @blovedboston

@elizaaustin

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Eliza Venn shares daily life with her cutie pie kiddos Norah and Henry. While her pics will brighten anyone’s day, parents who have partners that travel often will relate to this pilot-wife.

IG: @elizaaustin

@briannejohanson

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Brianne Johanson shares style, home & life moments over on her Instagram page. You'll find her sharing moments with her two kids, Crew and Saylor as well. 

IG: @briannejohanson

@ciaraclarkwellness

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Integrative Health Coach, Ciara Clark, shares healthy eating tips with a focus on plant-based diets, alongside oh-so-cute pics of her little one on this fresh feed.

IG: @ciaraclarkwellness

@jppilates1

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Pilates and Barre instructor Jennifer Phelan shares images of her life as a city-dwelling mom to two adorable boys. Hint: You'll also find fitness inspiration and tips while you're there.

IG: @jppilates1

https://www.instagram.com/p/CdWPsndJgff/?hidecaption=true

@lenize.fuentes

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Real life is shared by mom-of-three Lenize Fuentes including travel ideas, room refreshes and breastfeeding tips and tricks that we all need.

IG: @lenize.fuentes

—Allison Sutcliffe & Kate Loweth

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Your Guide to Well-Baby Doctor Visits in Baby’s First Year

by Eva Ingvarson Cerise

Experts recommend 6-8 well-baby visits during the first year. If you’re thinking, what’s up, doc, you’re not alone. Read on to find out what to expect from each doctor’s appointment, what you should bring and how to get the most out of your visit.

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What to Bring with You

Reference documents: driver’s license, insurance card, hospital documents from baby’s birth, information about family members’ health history and allergies

Baby necessities: burp cloths, extra diapers and wipes (the doctor will remove baby’s diaper), hand wipes, baby bottle, a blanket in case baby gets cold, a lovey or favorite stuffed animal, a pacifier if you use them

Mom necessities: an extra shirt in case of spit-up, water and a snack in case you have to wait for the doctor. Once your baby is eating solids, bring snacks for them too.

Questions: Keep a list on your phone or in a small notebook so you can jot down questions when you think of them. Bring a printed version of the questions to your appointment so you don’t forget anything and can write down your doctor’s answers.

What Happens at a Well-Baby Pediatrician Appointment

Each appointment will vary depending on baby’s age, but here's what you can expect:

○ Measurement of your baby’s height, weight and head circumference to monitor your child’s growth curve; plus a discussion of that curve

○ A head-to-toe physical exam, including eyes, ears (and hearing), mouth, neck, skin, heart, lungs, abdomen, hips, genitalia and legs

○ A discussion of your child’s physical and cognitive development

○ Vaccinations, at most visits, if you’ve chosen them

○ Time for you to ask questions and bring up concerns

Read on for specifics of each visit.

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Day 3-5 Well-Baby Visit

In the first week of your child’s life, pediatricians will do a physical exam; measure baby’s height, weight and head circumference; and observe baby’s behavior, reactions and reflexes.

Don’t sweat it: It’s common for babies to lose some body weight after birth. They typically gain it back by the time they hit two weeks old. As your doctor tracks your child's physical growth and tells you which percentile they're in, remember that the actual numbers and percentages are usually less important than whether your child is growing steadily along their curve.

Topics to discuss:

○ SIDS and creating a safe sleep environment

○ How often and how much your child eats

○ Frequency of wet diapers and bowel movements, and what bowel movement look like

○ Your child’s growth curve

 

1-Month Well-Baby Visit

At this visit, in addition to taking measurements, doing a physical exam and checking development, your doctor may give your child a second hepatitis B shot (they typically received the first right after birth).

Don’t sweat it: It’s normal for your child (and you!) to cry when they get shots. Shots are typically done at the end of the visit so you can comfort your child with cuddles and nursing or a bottle before you leave.

Topics to discuss:

○ What to do if your child is inconsolable in the evenings (aka the witching hours)

○ If your child is dealing with diaper rashes, baby acne or cradle cap, the doctor can give you advice on how to treat these conditions

○ How often you're doing tummy time

○ Whether your child needs vitamin D drops

○ How your baby is sleeping

○ How often and how much your child feeds

○ Frequency of wet diapers and bowel movements, and what bowel movements look like. Hard, dry poop could indicate constipation, and mucousy, soft stools can signal a food intolerance.

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2-Month Well-Baby Visit

Your child will likely receive immunizations at this visit, if you've chosen them. The doctor will also check your baby’s head control and posture.

Don’t sweat it: Some babies feel discomfort in the day or two after shots, so be prepared to notice a change in your child’s behavior and energy level. Offer extra cuddles and comfort, and clear your schedule if you can.

Topics to discuss:

○ If your child is dealing with colic, constipation, diaper rashes, baby acne, reflux, sleep or feeding issues, the doctor can give you advice

○ Whether your child needs vitamin D drops

○ How your baby is sleeping

○ How often and how much your child feeds

○ Frequency of wet diapers and bowel movements, and what bowel movements look like

○ Whether your baby smiles yet

○ How you characterize your baby’s temperament. If your child seems weepy, restless or uncomfortable, your doctor can explore possible causes

○ How you’re feeling. If you’re experiencing postpartum depression or anxiety, you should bring it up to your child’s doctor and your own.

 

4-Month Well-Baby Visit

Your child will receive more immunizations, if you've chosen them, and may receive a hemoglobin screening to test for anemia. The doctor will also begin looking for, and discussing with you, age-appropriate milestones for your child.

Don’t sweat it: Babies develop at their own pace, so don’t assume the worst if your child hasn’t reached a certain milestone. Tell your doctor if your child is losing skills they once had or if you’re concerned about any aspect of their development (like crawling, talking, hearing, eyesight).

Topics to discuss:

○ Whether your child needs vitamin D drops

○ How your baby is sleeping

○ How often and how much your child feeds

○ Frequency of wet diapers and bowel movements, and what bowel movements look like

○ Age-appropriate milestones, such as whether your child can roll over, sit up with support, push up from their belly, grab items and kick with both legs.

○ Whether your baby communicates by babbling, squealing, laughing, copying caregivers’ facial expressions and sounds

 

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6-Month Well-Baby Visit

More standard tests and (sorry) immunizations. Your doctor may also do a lead screening, as older homes can have lead paint, which, in high doses, can be harmful to babies. Your child may also receive a tuberculosis test and, if any teeth have popped through, your doctor will want to see them. Since babies are likely to crawl soon, it’s a good time to talk to your doctor about ways to childproof your home.

Don’t sweat it: Childproofing your home doesn’t have to mean spending a lot of money. Here are 14 DIY babyproofing tricks to make your home safe as your baby gets more mobile.

Topics to discuss:

○ If it’s time to start your child on solid food. And, if so, which foods your doctor recommends

○ If your child has teeth, how you should care for them

○ Age-appropriate milestones, such as whether your child is rolling over in both directions, sitting up without support, showing interest in their environment, babbling and imitating sounds and expressions

○ Whether your baby needs vitamin D drops

○ How your baby is sleeping

○ How often and how much your child feeds

○ Frequency of wet diapers and bowel movements, and how bowel movements change after introducing solid foods

 

9-Month Well-Baby Visit

In addition to the standard tests, a review of baby’s oral health and perhaps immunizations, your doctor will look more closely at your baby’s development. The doctor will likely ask you questions about how your child moves and interacts with you.

Don’t sweat it: If your child has any developmental delays, your pediatrician can give you valuable resources. Early intervention in the form of physical therapy or speech therapy can help your child develop new skills.

Topics to discuss:

○ Age-appropriate milestones, such as crawling, saying words, responding to their name, pointing, using the pincer grip, feeding themselves, playing games with you or others

○ If your child is experiencing separation anxiety or fear of strangers

○ How you should care for your child’s teeth

○ Whether your baby needs vitamin D drops or gets enough from solid foods

○ How your baby is sleeping

○ How often and how much your child eats (breastmilk/formula and solids)

○ Frequency of wet diapers and bowel movements, and what bowel movements look like

 

12-Month Well-Baby Visit

You’re a pro at this point and know what to expect at these doctor visits. But as you've learned with babies, they're always learning new things and changing their routines, so you'll have lots to discuss at this and future appointments.

Don’t sweat it: You’ve almost made it through year one, with all the big changes and sleeplessness that goes along with it. You can handle whatever year two throws at you.

Topics to discuss:

○ Age-appropriate milestones, such as whether your child is pulling themselves up, cruising along furniture, walking, pointing, saying words, responding to what you say, playing games with you or others

○ How you should care for your child’s teeth

○ Whether you should introduce cow's milk into baby's diet

○ Whether your baby needs vitamin D drops or gets enough from solid foods

○ How your baby is sleeping

○ How often and how much your child eats (breastmilk/formula and solids)

○ Frequency of wet diapers and bowel movements, and what bowel movements look like

 

 

RELATED STORIES:
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New Health & Safety Innovations for Babies & Toddlers

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The Day the Tables Turned

By Jordan Lamping

Five years ago I became a teacher; five years ago I also became the mother to a son in heaven. On August 12th, 2016, I came home from my first new teacher workday. It was exhilarating and exciting, and for the first time in a long time, I knew I was exactly where I should be. I had no idea that a few short hours later, I’d find myself in the hospital in preterm labor with our first child. That same day, we lost our son Jaxon at only 21 weeks.

I found myself wondering how on earth I was going to go back into that classroom and teach a room full of 28 kids when I had just lost my own. Nevertheless, I did it only four short days later. And now, looking back, I know that that choice completely changed my life. I knew that was exactly where I was meant to be.

Fast forward to April 2, 2017, I found myself in the same space. In preterm labor, this time with twin boys. That day, we lost our boys Everett and Bryant. Again, nearly immediately after, I threw myself back into my work. Now here we were, struggling with what to do next. We wanted to be parents more than anything, and we knew we had so much love to give. So in January 2018, after 7 long months of bed rest, we welcomed our angel on earth, Maddox. And we were smitten.

Being a teacher is often a double-edged sword. You’re educated on child development just enough to be hypercritical of not only your work but also the work within your own home, with your own kids. Maddox was a spitfire from the day he was born. So independent, but so kind-hearted and eager to explore the world. I can also tell you down to the minute when I realized that something wasn’t right.

I was sitting in the viewing area at his very first swim lesson. I had convinced my husband to get in the pool with him (more like I lost at rock, paper, scissors), so I struck up a conversation with the mom sitting next to me. Her daughter was in Maddox’s class, and we had discovered that they were only a few days apart. Maddox nearly doubled her in size, but she had something Maddox didn’t; eye contact, pointing, talking to her mom, waving, blowing kisses. She had effortless interaction, and meaningful engagement. There we sat behind the glass, her receiving waves and kisses, and me desperately trying to have Maddox even look at me.

That’s when I knew.

We are blessed with the most incredible pediatrician, turned family friend, and within minutes of this realization, I had sent her a text message.

“I think Maddox has autism.”

Although no one around me was on board at the time, they supported me, and they listened, and I could never put into words how grateful I am for that.

The following month, Maddox turned 18 months old. We had speech evaluations, occupational therapy evaluations, and physical therapy evaluations. It was determined that my 18-month-old was currently communicating at the level of a 3-to-6-month-old. His repetition had also worried them to the point of needing weekly occupational therapy sessions, as well as speech.

The next few months were a blur, I never stopped. I googled, I tried finding Facebook groups, anything I could do to find even a glimmer of hope. And that’s where this journey of autism becomes lonely. Before this, I had no idea how broad this spectrum truly is. No two journeys are the same, and there is no one-size-fits-all description.

This past winter, we had Maddox’s first preschool evaluation to have his IEP written. Even though I had gone through the diagnosis and all the therapies, and all of the sleepless nights I spent worrying, this was the hardest for me.

For the first time, I was on the other side of the table.

I suddenly found myself trying to flip the switch from teacher to mom. I wasn’t advocating for accommodations for my students anymore, I was doing it for my own child. And although I had always had the greatest empathy for the parents of my IEP students, this was different. Now, we had something even greater in common. In that moment, I came to understand them better than ever. I understood why they were so passionate, sometimes to a fault, about making their child’s educational experience the best it could possibly be.

I can’t tell you how scary it is to send your 3-year old into a building with adults that you don’t know and who don’t know you. But I can tell you that it’s even scarier when your child can’t talk to you about their day, and they can’t communicate with you in the same way that typically occurs at their age.

Maddox’s diagnosis may have turned our world upside down, but now we fight every single day to turn the world right-side-up for him.

And although I had grown used to being the teacher at that table, I was now fighting to become comfortable and aware of my new place, on the other side of the table.

 

This post originally appeared on Finding Cooper’s Voice.

My name is Jordan Lamping and I am the mother of an amazing three year old son named Maddox, who was diagnosed with autism just over a year ago. I'm also a teacher, and the creator of The Other Side of the Table blog. 

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Accepting & Loving Your Postpartum Body

By Ashley Rice

Carrying and birthing life into this world is a miracle. Our bodies go through so many beautiful changes in order for this to happen. Yet there is a cultural expectation for moms to erase signs of pregnancy immediately after giving birth. We are made to feel ashamed of our protruding belly, loose skin, stretch marks, and sagging breasts. We feel the pressure to immediately get our pre-pregnancy body back! When I’m asked how I was able to do it I simply respond, “I didn’t and I’m not mad about it!”

After carrying and birthing four babies, I have learned to celebrate and love my body unconditionally. I’ll be honest though, it took almost four pregnancies before I got to this place of self love. I finally started nourishing and moving my body from a place of love and adoration, which helped me to start enjoying my postpartum fitness journey. I changed my focus from achieving a certain weight, size, or shape to giving my body what it needed to thrive! It was this mindset shift that led to improved health, increased energy and confidence.

Here are 7 things I did that helped me develop a healthy and enjoyable lifest‌yle:

1. I took time to rest and recover. I took time to bond and enjoy my baby, while my body healed. I had a C-section with each of my pregnancies, so I was never in a rush to start exercising. Once I reached the 8 week postpartum mark, I started walking a few days a week. I started slowly, really listening to my body and only doing what it allowed. 

2. I focused on actionable goals rather than outcome goals. This means I figured out what actions I needed to take to reach my larger, long term goal. My short term goals, starting out, were to drink plenty of water daily, eat protein at every meal and snack, and to get in three, 25 minute workouts each week. By focusing on actionable goals, I felt more in control of my journey because I was in control of my actions. It also made the journey fun because it kept me from focusing on how far away I was from my pre-pregnancy size, and brought me to the present! My focus became about conquering each goal for the day, and that was doable! This also kept me focused on sustainable and healthy methods to lose the baby weight, rather than turning to quick fixes, jeopardizing my overall health to temporarily move the scale. 

3. I built a strong foundation. After a few weeks of just walking, I eased into workouts, really focusing on building stability in my core and joints. I learned the importance of this the hard way! After my third pregnancy, I made the mistake of skipping over this step and I ended up with a back injury as a result. I spent several months in physical therapy, to reverse the injury and build stability in my core. The hormonal changes and changes from pregnancy and delivery can cause joint dysfunction, especially around the pelvis, and weakness of the pelvic floor. That, combined with the separation of the abdominal muscles to allow for a growing belly, are a recipe for injury. This is why after Baylor was born, I made strengthening my core a priority. When people think core, they often think sit-ups are the best way to target it. Instead, it’s important to focus on strengthening the deepest abdominal layer, the pelvic floor, and hip stabilizing muscles.

4. I ate more protein. By increasing my protein intake, I was able to boost my metabolism significantly, helping to burn calories and fat throughout the day. It also helped to curb my hunger by balancing out weight-regulating hormones. I increased my protein intake by eating protein at every meal and snack, making sure to eat at least every 3-4 hours throughout the day. My go-to lean protein sources were grilled chicken, grass fed ground beef, beans and legumes, eggs, salmon and tuna.

5. I cut back on processed food. I tried to eat mostly whole, natural foods while limiting my intake of foods from a package. However, it was busy with four kids under six years old and I was breastfeeding a brand new baby. I definitely wasn’t prepping all my foods from scratch. To make the best choices I could, I made sure to read the ingredients list on the food labels. I would try to choose options with ingredients I could pronounce or understand, avoiding the big and unrecognizable ingredients that are more heavily processed and chemically altered.  

6. I drank a lot of water. Since I was breastfeeding Baylor, I knew I needed to drink plenty of water to keep my milk supply up. I also wanted to make sure that I was getting enough water to support my recovery from workouts, energy levels, digestion, and skin. These areas tend to suffer when I’m not getting enough. I carried around a 32 oz water bottle and refilled it several times throughout the day.

7. I showed up consistently. At the beginning of each week I took time to schedule my workouts like I would a meeting. I blocked that time off for myself. If something came up, I always made sure to reschedule my workout for another day or time. It wasn’t about being perfect in my fitness routine or diet, because I never was. There were also times I had to cut my workouts short to tend to a crying baby or needy toddler. What was important was that I kept showing up! It was the consistency that led to change.

I encourage you to celebrate and love your body for all it has done! You will be surprised at how far a little self love can take you. While you may not look or feel the way you did before having babies, I can promise you this. You are beautiful!  

RELATED STORIES:
How You Can Restore Your Postpartum Core
Genius At-Home Fitness Hacks for Busy Parents
10 Workouts New Moms Can Do at Home

This post originally appeared on The Lavender Lifestyle.

Ashley and Jocelyn have experienced it all being a working mom, stay-at-home mom, pregnancy fitness, postpartum fitness, fad diets, nutrition struggles, etc. Both are NASM certified personal trainers, certified nutrition coaches, and hold a B.S. in Health/Fitness management. They help women step into their power and become who they are meant to be, inside + out!

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5 Adorable Animals You May Meet on a Trip to Annenberg PetSpace

by Nora Buchholtz
Partner Content

Anyone who’s ever loved an animal knows just how special the bond between person and pet can be. The long walks in the park, the endless games of fetch and the sweet, curled-up cuddles after a long day make up some of life’s best memories for both people and their pets.  

If you have an animal lover in your family, you’ll be thrilled to hear about the work that Annenberg PetSpace is doing across Southern California. Annenberg PetSpace is focused on the benefits that animals and people receive from loving and caring for each other and is a unique community space that includes an education center, a leadership institute, and, best of all for people who are looking to add a new (four-legged) family member, an adoption center. 

Annenberg PetSpace is open to the public and committed to fostering a love of animals in the next generation. On a visit, you’ll have the opportunity to take part in a Pet Encounter with an adoptable animal, explore the Critter Corner and enjoy a behind-the-scenes view of how pets are received and prepared for adoption. Interested in adding to your family? Annenberg PetSpace lets you schedule an appointment for a meet-and-greet with a potential pet and gives the option to take them home the same day!

 

If you’re interested in adding someone special to your family, check out these friendly pets who are currently living at Annenberg PetSpace as they wait for their forever home:

Heidi

Heidi is two years old and 62 lbs of bouncy, full-of-life fun. With her perky ears and soft tan and black fur, she’s a picture-perfect pup who’s looking for a family to call her own. Heidi can be shy when she meets new people for the first time but loves to play and cuddle once she’s gotten to know you!

Zorro

Zorro is the perfect mid-sized pup for an experienced pet parent who’s ready to build a loving, trusting relationship with a dog who has lots of love to give! Zorro had a leg injury, received surgery and is working hard to regain his strength in physical therapy. At just two years old, this playful guy is ready for a lifetime full of love!

Clifford

Clifford might not be quite as big or quite as red as the Big Red Dog, but he’s got a heart just as sweet and can’t wait to be a part of a family! Clifford can be a little nervous meeting new people (who isn’t?), but it doesn’t take much to get his tail wagging.

Cheesy Mac

Cheesy Mac is a laid-back kitty who likes things quiet and relaxed, but who gets playful quickly when someone brings out his favorite toys. Cheesy Mac is looking for a home where he can snuggle up and relax in calm and tranquility with a helpful human there to make sure he gets all the snuggles he needs!

Sadie

Sadie is a four-year-old pup who is ready for a loving, trusting family. She's timid and takes a little while to trust people, but once you get to know this 76-pound doggo she's sure to be a furever friend. 

If your family is looking for a new pet and wants to explore options other than dogs or cats, a visit to the Annenberg PetSpace Critter Corner is a must-do! The Critter Corner, home to a variety of small animals, is designed to help potential families learn about all the pet options available to them and determine what sort of animal might be the best fit for their family! 

With a playful box turtle, a California kingsnake, a cockatiel, a domestic rabbit, a guinea pig, a hamster and a leopard gecko, the Annenberg PetSpace Critter Corner has something for everyone. As you move through the Critter Corner you’ll have a chance to learn about what sort of care each animal needs, what makes them feel happy and fulfilled and what you’ll need to do if you want to bring one into their home. 

This summer, whether your family is on the lookout for a new pet or not, an afternoon spent at the Annenberg PetSpace is an afternoon well spent!

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A Letter to My Middle Child

By Caitlyn Viviano

Photo: Caitlyn Viviano

Sometimes it’s hard to be sandwiched in between two siblings who both require a significant amount of time and attention in completely different ways.

The oldest, needing to be out the door at the crack of dawn in order to get to school on time. Then after school, it’s spelling words, reading intervention, and dance. Her sweet and sassy self is always keeping us on our toes. While the baby requires so much of me, from pumping around the clock, scrubbing bottles, physical therapy appointments, and endless laundry. He is happiest when being held and generally hates to be put down even if just for a few short minutes.

But you, my sweet middle child, enjoy the simple things in life and require so little to be truly happy.

Thank you for running into my room with a big smile, hands full of dinosaurs, asking me to play with you, because the chores can wait.

Thank you for eating anything and everything I put on your plate even if it’s green and looks like a tree.

Thank you for loving our outings to the grocery store just as much as our outings to the toy store.

Thank you for picking me beautiful flowers and weeds on every walk we take.

Thank you for telling me I’m “the best cooker ever” when I make you boxed mac n cheese.

Thank you for never throwing a tantrum when your sister gets to go somewhere and you have to stay home with me.

Thank you for accompanying me to every doctor’s appointment for your siblings and never complaining about all the waiting.

Thank you for drawing me unique works of art and presenting them to me with such pride, even if you do call them “scribble scrabble.”

Thank you for entertaining yourself with toy cars and action figures while I pump and feed your brother.

Thank you for loving me as you do, even on the hard days, and telling me I’m beautiful, even if I haven’t showered in a few days.

Thank you for giving the best hugs at the perfect time, and for making me feel whole again.

One day, in the not so distant future, you will be in school all day and the house will be eerily quiet. No loud games of Ninja Turtles where we run around the house together with cardboard swords pretending to fight off “bad guys.”

No more afternoons playing in the dirt in the backyard and looking for bugs that you will convince me to let you bring inside. No more lazy days snuggled on the couch watching your favorite cartoons and eating way too many cookies. No more late afternoons reading truck books followed by long naps. You will have an exciting life outside the house and won’t need me as much. So for now I will soak up every minute, every day with you, my loving and perfect middle child. You, my son, are something special and our family is better off because of you! 

Caitlyn is a military spouse and mom to three children and one fur baby. She was an elementary school counselor before becoming a stay at home who enjoys coffee, hiking, and playing in the dirt with her kids. 

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A Different Kind of Grief

By Courtney Mills

I heard it once said that those of us with special needs children suffer a loss. But when we first hear about our child’s diagnosis, it often at times, stays festered up inside. Keeping us full of denial and not wanting to believe it is true. We aren’t physically suffering a loss. We suffer the loss of a dream we had. We have missed expectations and missed experiences. 

This is not how it was supposed to be. When bringing a child into our family we imagine what their first day of school will look like. Not, will my son ever speak? By this I mean will he be able to verbally communicate what is going on? You look forward to picking your child up on the first day of school and asking them how their day went. For the past few years of my son attending a developmental preschool, that is a question I have been unable to ask him. I have to rely on his classroom teacher to write it down. I have to rely on his therapists to tell me what they worked on in therapy and how well he did or what issues they had. This is not what it looked liked as I dreamed about my child’s future during pregnancy.

You look forward to activities you can do as a family. If we don’t learn to accept that we are suffering a loss and integrate it into our lives, we will just continue to get knocked down over and over. 

Forget about date nights with your significant other because your life turns into revolving around your child. At least for my family, it has. Or worse yet, trying to visit another family or attend holiday celebrations. It’s hard, as much as we try to explain to our family what our son can and cannot handle, they just don’t understand. Is it their fault? Sometimes I feel yes, but then sometimes I remember they don’t live the life I do. They don’t see it on a daily basis to understand what we try to explain. Still, though, more often than not, it saddens me. 

What about a simple trip to the store? Up till a few weeks ago, we hadn’t been to a store as a family in months. The experiences of taking your child to the store to get a toy? I can count on one hand how many times we have been able to attempt this. Most end with my husband taking our son out to the car while I get what is needed.

I feel like, in a way, we don’t just try to meet our child’s needs but also end up trying to meet their wants. 

I grieve the fact that playdates are not something that will probably happen. I joined a MOPS (Mothers of Preschoolers) group where we live, trying to socialize. Make fellow mom friends and allowing Graham social interaction with other kids. Unfortunately, it was not anything like what I imagined. I attended one play date which consisted of me chasing Graham around. I didn’t get to interact much with the other moms and it broke my heart to see my son not socialize with other children. All he wanted to do was run. 

Our family outings are rare unless it’s for a doctor’s appointment and then we try to make a day of it. The only day of the week where my husband doesn’t have to go to work, Graham doesn’t go to school, or have therapy is Sundays. I grieve the loss of just our family time, just us three. I struggled with deciding to put Graham in so much therapy at such a young age. I mean who doesn’t want their child to have time to just be a kid? 

We started early intervention services at 18 months old. He started going to a developmental preschool Monday through Friday from 8 a.m. to 3:30 p.m. He receives speech, occupational, and for a year he received physical therapy. But when we started having more issues with his behavior from the frustration of not being able to communicate, we had to look into additional therapy. So we applied for home ABA therapy and after a 6-month wait, we now do 20 hrs a week of that as well. 

Did I ever imagine grieving over things lost with raising an autistic son? Of course not, I imagined a life full of outings, conversations, and family gatherings. We don’t just stop or give up. But things look different for us.

This post originally appeared on Guiding Graham’s Way.

I'm a wife and a mom. I have a three year old son. I spend my time advocating for special needs children, bringing awareness and acceptance to all. My son was diagnosed with severe autism at age two. He is my life. 

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Key Strategies for Raising a Child during a Pandemic

By Michelle Worth

If you feel like your head is spinning with terms like new normal, social distancing, and virtual learning, you’re not alone! Being a parent under normal circumstances can be a constant balancing act. Throw in a global pandemic, and you’re faced with more questions than ever.

How can I comfort my child during these uncertain times?

Is my child really going to wear a mask and social distance?

Extracurricular activities are out for now—how do I keep my child busy and active?

E-learning? While I work from home?!

The good news? There are some simple strategies to address these problems that so many parents are faced with.

Communication is Key

Help your child stay positive by communicating comforting words. Kids are perceptive from a young age, and can often read emotions that parents may be feeling. Try keeping a positive attitude around your child. Asking specific questions can help start a discussion about your child’s emotions, attitudes, and fears surrounding the Coronavirus. Try using conversation starters like, “I’m sure it feels different wearing a mask at school this year”. Set aside a quiet time like car rides or bedtime to have these talks. 

Communicate to improve cooperation! Children are often pulled here, there, and everywhere. The more they feel out of control, the more behavioral challenges they can have. Talk to your child before and during an outing to help them understand what to expect.

Before: Let your child know where you will be going. Talk about whether he or she will need to wear a mask and any other special precautions you’ll be taking.

During: Give praise! Comment to your child on specific things he or she is doing well.

Rely on Routines

The Coronavirus has resulted in many parents feeling like they are living in (semi)controlled chaos. One very important solution to this? Rely on routines to provide a sense of predictability and structure. Maintaining routines that your family established prior to the current pandemic, and even adding in some new ones, can be a lifesaver for both you and your children!

Research shows that routines can help mothers feel more competent and satisfied in their parenting role. Also, the burden of change may be reduced and children can be better equipped to cope with transitions. Happy parents and happy children amidst a global pandemic—all by sticking to some basic household routines!

Routines might look different depending on your parenting style and family’s needs, but bedtime is a good place to start. Make sure your child goes to bed at the same time that he or she did before the pandemic began. Keep a routine such as bath, books, brush teeth, and bed.

Get Everyone Involved

You’re simultaneously cleaning up your toddler’s toys while dinner cooks in the oven, and the dishwasher still needs to be emptied. Sound familiar? The kids might be around the house more right now, but that doesn’t mean you have to hand over their tablets or find other ways to entertain them while you complete household tasks. Get everyone involved!

Not only can involving children in household tasks help ensure you maintain an efficient home, but it can also benefit their language and cognitive development! Helping with chores can even give children a sense of confidence. Kids of all ages can help on some level.

How to involve toddlers: Give your child simple tasks like putting toys in a designated toy box to improve their comprehension skills. Invite your child to help prepare dinner! Narrate aloud what you are doing (e.g., “First, I’m washing the vegetables.”) to help your child learn vocabulary and how to order words to form sentences. Ask your child to do things like pour an ingredient in a bowl or mix with a spoon and encourage him or her to describe what they are doing.

How to involve school-aged children: Asking your school-aged child to help with tasks like putting dishes away can improve his or her cognitive skills such as organization, categorization, and attention. Older children can help out (and develop auditory processing/sequencing skills) by following several steps you give them to complete a task. For example, taking the laundry out of the dryer, folding it, then putting it away.

This printable age-by-age chore chart is perfect for finding the right job for kids of all ages to help out with.

Take Advantage of Telehealth

If you have concerns with your child’s development, take advantage of telehealth! We are so fortunate to live in this time of advanced technology. If your child is having difficulty in areas such as communication, you can still seek help through this convenient and effective approach. TherapyWorks provides pediatric speech, occupational, and physical therapy, and social work services via teletherapy, and can match your child with a therapist based on their unique needs.

I'm a mom entrepreneur and Co-Founder of TherapyWorks, a pediatric therapy company that provides services via telehealth. I recognized the need to make high-quality pediatric therapy more convenient after one of my own children needed therapy and launched TherapyWorks with my Co-Founder, an experienced speech language-pathologist, with that in mind. 

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Study Shows Children With Autism & ADHD May Be Able to Be Identified Earlier

by Jennifer Swartvagher

According to a new study, children with autism and attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) visited doctors and hospitals more often during their first year of life than non-affected children. Even before being diagnosed, these babies’ health care patterns are unique. These findings suggest that we may be able to identify these conditions earlier than thought. 

baby

The findings from Duke Health researchers, appearing online Oct. 19 in the journal Scientific Reports, provide evidence that health care utilization patterns in a baby’s first year can serve as a roadmap to provide timey diagnoses and treatments which can improve outcomes and reduce healthcare costs. 

“This study provides evidence that children who develop autism and ADHD are on a different path from the beginning,” said lead author Matthew Engelhard, M.D., Ph.D., a senior research associate at Duke. “We have known that children with these diagnoses have more interactions with the health care system after they’ve been diagnosed, but this indicates that distinctive patterns of utilization begin early in these children’s lives. This could provide an opportunity to intervene sooner.”

Autism spectrum disorder affects approximately 1.5% of children in the United States and ADHD affects about 11% of U.S. children. ADHD symptoms are also present in up to 60% of children with ASD.  

“We know that children with ASD and ADHD often receive their diagnosis much later, missing out on the proven benefits that early interventions can bring,” said Geraldine Dawson, Ph.D., director of the Duke Center for Autism and Brain Development and the Duke Institute for Brain Sciences. “Owing to the brain’s inherent malleability — its neuroplasticity — early detection and intervention are critical to improving outcomes in ASD, especially in terms of language and social skills.”

Engelhard and colleagues, including senior authors Dawson and Scott Kollins, Ph.D., used 10 years of data collected from the electronic health records of nearly 30,000 patients, primarily at Duke University Health System, who had at least two well-child visits before age one.

Patients were grouped as having later been diagnosed with ASD, ADHD, both conditions or no diagnosis. The researchers then analyzed the first-year records for hospital admissions, procedures, emergency department visits and outpatient clinical appointments.

For the children who were later found to have one or both of the diagnoses, their births tended to result in longer hospital stays compared to children without the disorders.

Children later diagnosed with ASD had higher numbers of procedures, including intubation and ventilation, and more outpatient specialty care visits for services such as physical therapy and eye appointments.

Children who were later found to have ADHD had more procedures, notably including blood transfusions, as well as more hospital admissions and more emergency department visits.

Studies show that treatments for these disorders work best when they begin early in a child’s life, Dawson said. Understanding that there are signals available in a child’s electronic health record could help lead to earlier and more targeted therapies.

“We are hopeful that these early utilization patterns can eventually be combined with other sources of data to build automated surveillance tools to help parents and pediatricians identify which kids will benefit most from early assessment and treatment,” Kollins said.

The researchers said they plan to conduct additional analyses to explore more fully what specific health concerns prompted the extra doctor and hospital visits.

“We want to understand these distinctions in greater detail and identify them as soon as possible to make sure children have access to the resources they need,” Engelhard said.

—Jennifer Swartvagher

Featured photo: Jonathan Borba on Unsplash 

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