We know “Netflix and chill “doesn’t mean what it used to, thanks to life with littles, but when you’ve got the time to wind down after the kids are in bed, click off Disney+ and click on these adult shows on Netflix that are sure to keep you awake no matter how tired you are—at least through several episodes. From hilarious comedies to heart-pumping thrillers, here’s what we’re binge-watching on Netflix right now.

"The Brothers Sun"

Production still from The Brothers Sun, one of the best adult shows on Netflix

It's late. You're in bed. And you want a little action. But not that kind of action. Try hitting up the new series starring recently crowned Best Actress Michelle Yeoh. She plays the strong-willed mother of a family of gang members whose enemies have come a-knocking. There's a lot of choreographed fighting, fun quipping, and every shade of Yeoh on the acting spectrum. 

"Carol & the End of the World"

production still of Carol & the end of the world, one of the best adult shows on Netflix

From one of the brilliant writers for the criminally underappreciated campus comedy Community comes this miniseries about a 42-year-old accounting assistant who has absolutely no idea why the impending doom destined for Eearth means her quiet little life has to change. Like Carol in the mass of hedonistic chaos around her, this animated adult dramedy is a diamond in Netflix's digital rough.  

"Bridgerton"

Obsessed? Same. Now that you're done bingeing Queen Charlotte and eagerly anticipating the next installment of the period drama, why not work on a little refresh? While you wait for season 3 to hit the streamer (part 1: May 16; part 2: June 13), catch up on the first two seasons. Then get ready to learn more about Penelope Featherington and her longtime crush, world traveler Colin Bridgerton.

"Wednesday"

The Addams Family reruns you watched as a kid pale in comparison to this witty Tim Burton remake. The series stars Jenna Ortega as the brilliant and totally dark title character. Shipped off to Nevermore, a boarding school for outcasts, Wednesday finds herself in the middle of a mystery. Including nods to the original, with an updated ethos, this show is definitely worth a few hours of your time—okay, eight hours. Once you finish the first season, get ready for season 2 in April.

Related: Netflix Announces 'Wednesday' Will Return for Season 2

"Russian Doll"

A production still from Russian Doll, one of the best adult shows on Netflix

If you haven't caught on to this sci-fi/fantasy show that's absolutely bingeable, our only question is: Why not? Natasha Lyonne plays Nadia, doomed to repeat her 36th birthday over and over again until she gets it right, a la Groundhog Day, but with less humor and more mind-blowing plot twists. Sit down to two seasons; Netflix says a third is in the works now.

"Umbrella Academy"

a production still from The Umbrella Academy, one of the best adults shows on Netflix

Reuniting after their father's death, a group of estranged siblings sees their superpowers and a whole closet's worth of family secrets spill out. So far, the series has wrapped three seasons, with the upcoming fourth season said to be the final chapter. According to Ritu Arya, who plays Lila Pitts, season four will be the comic-book adaptation's best yet. So catch up now!

"Lupin"

a man walks briskly outside the Louvre in Paris, adult shows on netflix lupin

Forget the Ocean's. This French series will leave you wanting more after the first heart-pounding scene at the Louvre. A true gentleman thief, Assane Diop (Omar Sy) sets out to avenge his father who was unjustly imprisoned when Assane was a child. Taking cues from his favorite fictional criminal hero, Arsène Lupin, he steals from the rich and exposes the truth. Part three is now streaming.

"Beef"

a production still from Beef, one of the best adult shows on Netflix

Steven Yeun and Ali Wong star in this wild road-rage comedy that has more twists and turns than Mulholland Drive. They play Danny Cho, a contractor, and Amy Lau, a business owner, and their "beef" begins when the two engage in a near fender bender. The experience ends up burrowing its way into their lives in ways you would never imagine. You will just eat this one up.

"Derry Girls"

Set in 1990s Northern Ireland—Londonderry, to be exact—this hidden gem is set against a backdrop of political upheaval that's nearing its end. School friends Erin, Michelle, Clare, Orla, and James navigate their teenage years with wit and, well, not really wisdom, but maybe the wisdom of youth that's as hilarious as it gets. Creator Lisa McGee has earned lots of praise for this one. 

"Virgin River"

The perfect romantic-yet-not-too cheesy drama finished up its fifth season last year, with a sixth season on its way. While you wait, you can catch up on all the plaid-patterned action and learn about what Mel and Jack are up to in the small town of Virgin River. Should you need more rom-coms while you mom-mom, check out our list of shows like Virgin River.

"Kim’s Convenience"

If you haven't caught this CBC show on Netflix yet, sit down and stream it tonight. Set in Canada, it's the story of convenient-store-owning Korean immigrants and their first-generation adult kids living in Toronto. Based on a play by Ins Choi, its subtle humor balances out the show's more serious themes, meaning you'll laugh, cry, scream, and feel all the other feels. 

"Glitch"

Production still from Glitch

Guaranteed you have never heard of this chilling Aussie gem. About a group of dead people who claw their way back to life from six feet under, Glitch is a genre-blending series that will blow your mind. No, those who have risen are not zombies. And, no, they are not ghosts. But, yes, they are back for a reason. Their journeys to find out why will keep you hooked.

"The Diplomat"

Production still from The Diplomat

Politics are a dirty game. But on The Diplomat, they're also completely absurd, ridiculous, and gloriously silly. Keri Russell stars as the titular ambassador and handles every bonkers plot twist, from international crises to marital exploits with skill and grace. Bless her. Catch up on season 1 now, because the next chapter is on the way, most likely hitting the platform this year.

"Insecure"

Production still from Insecure

Don't have MAX? No biggie. Netflix now has every season of Insecure (and Girlfriends, for that matter) for your streaming pleasure. So when you're done watching Firefly Lane on repeat, treat your viewing queue to Issa Rae's hit comedy about a group of twenty-somethings navigating love, life, and friendship in Los Angeles. 

Related: 10 Hidden Gem TV Shows on Netflix

"The Witcher"

Follow the adventures of Geralt of Rivia, a riveting and well-built monster hunter for hire as he journeys toward his destiny in a fantasy-based world where people are often the scariest beasts of them all. And as if spending late nights with Henry Cavill weren't reason enough to hit play on the adventure series, knowing that eye candy Liam Hemsworth is joining the cast for season 4 certainly is.

"Emily In Paris"

emily in paris woman holding a microphone with lights in the background, adult shows on netflix

An ambitious 20-something lands her dream job as a marketing exec in Paris. And the City of Love does not disappoint with three seasons of romance and adventure finding Emily on every corner. Season 4 got a bit delayed due to the 2023 writers' strikes, but worry not, word is new episodes of Emily, her friends, her lovers, and her wildly inspirational fashion choices will be out this year.

"The Crown"

Can’t get enough of the royal family? This intriguing peek into the reign and romance of Queen Elizabeth II will more than satisfy. It certainly doesn't hurt that it stars the Oscar-winning Olivia Colman for part of the saga as Her Royal Highness, either. Creator Peter Morgan has finally finished his story, with all six seasons streaming on the platform now.

"Good Girls"

YouTube

What happens when a picture-perfect, stay-at-home mom breaks bad? Good Girls. Part Weeds, part Breaking Bad, this series is a dark but fun fantasy escape that will draw you in from the first episode. In a stroke of horrible prime time decision making, the network canceled the series ahead of season five, but that doesn't mean you won't thoroughly enjoy all four seasons streaming now.

"Griselda"

Okay, yes, Ozark is a lot of fun. But odds are, you've seen Jason Bateman and Laura Linney boss up as money-laundering pros in the Ozark Mountains. So, queue up this thriller with links to the cartel instead. It stars Sofia Vergara playing against type in a queenpin role that will have you doing a double take. Drugs, money, motherhood, talk about binge-worthy. Look for it on January 25.

"Cobra Kai"

Thirty years after Karate Kid, the feud between Daniel LaRusso (Ralph Macchio) and Johnny Lawrence (William Zabka) is still going strong. A surprise hit series, Cobra Kai checks in on the rivals, now all grown up, and finds Johnny and Daniel raising a new class of karate masters in their own dojos. Catch up now because season six is on the burner for 2024. 

"Dead to Me"

This dark and twisty mystery about a grieving widow, played by the genius Christina Applegate, and her new best friend, the wonderful Linda Cardellini, will suck you in instantly and will not spit you out until the credits roll on the shocking end. Luckily (and, well, unfortunately), there are three complete seasons to keep you entertained.

"Escaping Twin Flames"

Ripping people off is as American as apple pie. LuLaRoe did it with patterned leggings, Bernie Madoff did it with a handshake, and cryptocurrency used Tom Brady. Twin Flames Universe, the online community at the focus of this 2023 Netflix docuseries, the lure is harmonious true love. And founders Jeff and Shaleia Divine swindled millions of their prey. 

Related: True Crime Docuseries Moms Can't Get Enough Of

"Ginny and Georgia"

a man hugs two children

In search of a fresh start, single mom Georgia moves her kids, Ginny and Austin, up north. Unfortunately, secrets from Georgia’s past come back to haunt them and threaten to make their new lives anything but perfect. As addictive as it is shocking at times, Ginny & Georgia is the gift that keeps on giving: Netflix has guaranteed that seasons 3 and 4 are on the way. 

"Workin’ Moms"

workin moms season six

The last and final season of this hilariously relatable mom-com was released in early 2023. As for the binge, we hope you can make it through all seven seasons without peeing your pants, tagging along with the working moms as they balance the impossible chaos of motherhood and returning to the office. If you've already seen the entire series, check out our picks for shows like Workin' Moms. 

"The Great British Baking Show"

Mouthwatering cake pops and canapes served up with some friendly competition make this series a must-watch for any home baker (or cookie-lover) looking for inspiration. If, however, you fear the yummy sponges on the screen may induce hunger pangs that send you straight to the kitchen for a snack, there's always the Emmy-nominated Selling Sunset to quell the late-night reality cravings. 

with additional reporting by DeAnna Janes

All photos courtesy of Netflix, unless noted.

 

In a new documentary that looks absolutely explosive, Jill Duggar Dillard is opening up about her family’s secret-filled past

If there’s any family in America worthy of an explosive documentary, it’s the Duggars. The former stars of TLC’s 19 Kids and Counting have been the subject of public intrigue—and so, so many scandals. And now, that documentary is coming, and if the trailer is any indication, it’s going to be a wild ride.

The producers of the hit docuseries LulaRich are behind Shiny Happy People, a new documentary on Amazon Prime that promises to expose some of the dark underbelly of the Duggars’ rise to fame—and subsequent fall from grace. And we know it’ll be more than just speculation about the famous family because a few Duggars have chosen to participate, including Jill.

“There’s a story that’s going to be told,” she can be heard saying in the trailer. “And I would rather be the one telling it.”

Shiny Happy People will explore the Institute in Basic Life Principles (IBLP), a religious organization run by disgraced former pastor Bill Gothard. The Duggars were one of IBLP’s most famous families.

“The IBLP teachings aren’t Christianity,” one woman explains. “They’re something entirely different.”

A man adds that Gothard and IBLP “turned every father into a cult leader and every home into an island,” and if that doesn’t sound like the Duggars.

The Duggars were once pretty closed off from the world, despite being the stars of a reality series. But in recent years, several siblings have spoken out about their upbringing, especially in the wake of their eldest brother Josh’s arrest for possession of child sexual abuse materials.

Shiny Happy People: Duggar Family Secrets premieres June 2 on Amazon Prime.

A child crimes investigator is going viral on TikTok for sharing the three things she’ll never let her kids do—and you may want to follow her lead

While social media and the internet have helped make the world a more connected place, they’ve also made it a lot scarier. We’re bombarded all the time with content that shows us all the terrifying things that can happen to our kids—and how is a parent supposed to separate the urban legends and freak accidents from actual danger that you should protect your kids from? Thank goodness for this child crimes investigator, who went viral on TikTok for sharing the three things that, based on what she sees through her work, she won’t allow her kids to do. Since she has the experience and evidence to back these claims up, you can feel comfortable following her lead and knowing that the things she points to are actual, real dangers that you can help your kids avoid.

TikTok user @emily.speed7 explains in the beginning of her video that she’s a Special Victims detective who investigates crimes against children. Then, she launches into the three things she says her kids will never have.

@emily.speed7

Sorry to be the bearer of bad news. Credit: @thegirlcop #womeninpolice #police #investigation #childinvestigator #SVU #childsafety #momsoftiktok #momtok #greenscreen

♬ She Knows – J. Cole

Number one, as you may have guessed, is sleepovers.

“You never know’s gonna be there and that’s not just other adults. That’s also other kids and siblings,” she explains. “I’ve had a lot of cases involving things that happen at sleepovers.”

While this may be controversial, it’s an important discussion. Sleepovers have been at the center of a ton of debate, and according to @emily.speed7, they’re a no-go for her family.

Next up is Snapchat.

“It’s not a good app,” she says. “There’s a lot of predators on this app that try to find kids and teenagers and get them to send pictures and videos of themselves, so I’ve had a lot of cases involving this app with child exploitation, so my kids will never have this.”

The last thing that this child crimes investigator calls out is based on the fact that 90% of child sexual abuse victims know their abuser, and about 60% are abused by someone their family knows and trusts. @emily.speed7 says she won’t teach her kids about stranger danger “just because statistics show that people that perpetrate on kids are usually the ones that are closest to us, that we love and that we trust.” Instead, she says, “I’m gonna be teaching more like, good touch and bad touch.”

She adds that she teaches her kids, “They can always come to me if anything like this ever was to happen and they would never be in trouble. But I’m going to stay away from the scenario of the creepy old man in the van that’s going to snatch them off the street because that’s just not the reality.”

Attachment.

If you follow popular parenting advice, you’ll know that being attached to your baby is important. If you spend too many hours apart from your baby (umm…daycare?), they might not get attached to you. If you don’t respond every time they cry, you might ‘break’ them. And if your child isn’t attached to you, then Bad Things Happen. They might not be happy as adults. They might not be able to have good relationships with others. They might even become delinquents or criminals—and certainly not responsible members of society who go to the right schools and get a good job.

But I spent weeks reviewing scientific research on attachment, and what I learned was pretty shocking. It turns out that the way popular parenting advice describes attachment actually isn’t based on the scientific research about attachment. It just cherry-picks the parts that sound most like they fit with our ideas about motherhood so we won’t question it.

So let’s dig into the evidence.  But first, let’s do a quick review of what attachment is—because I’m betting it’s not what you think it is.

What is attachment?

Dr. John Bowlby first used the term “attachment” to describe relationships between babies and their mothers, and he actually chose the word because it was easy for parents to get attached to, as it were. Who wouldn’t want something that sounds so much like snuggling and closeness and bonding? But Bowlby was really sloppy in his use of the word—psychologist Dr. Michael Rutter noticed that Bowlby used it in at least four ways: to describe internal mental states as well as relationships.

Another problem was that (now famous) Dr. Bill and his wife Martha Sears had developed some ideas that weren’t based in scientific research but that needed a positive name. They used Attachment Parenting “because it was so well researched and documented.” Attachment Parenting had little in common with Attachment Theory, but because Bowlby had been so loose with his own descriptions, the name stuck.

And it turns out that even the research has a lot of problems.

Separation may lead to bad outcomes (or not)…

One of Bowlby’s very earliest studies looked at 44 children who had been caught stealing, and compared these to 44 children who had problems but hadn’t stolen anything. He noticed that 12 of the thieves had had experiences of early separation from their parents compared with four of the other children, and thought that being separated from their parents led the thieves to have a low sense of empathy and self-worth.

Hearing this might make you want to never leave your child alone again, but much later in his life Bowlby acknowledged two really important issues. First, he didn’t mention that he had mixed up all kinds of separations into this one category: “separations” included everything from sleeping in their own bedroom to being sent to an orphanage, which means it’s almost impossible to draw any real conclusions from this data.

And second, separations weren’t the only traumas these children had experienced. Many of them had also suffered physical and sexual abuse, which wasn’t reported at all in the original paper.

So the foundation for all of the research on separations between parents and children that followed was highly flawed—and nobody knew it at the time. All we knew was that “separations” had strong links to negative outcomes for children—so no wonder parents were afraid.

Using daycare may lead to bad outcomes (or not)…

Bowlby also spent decades talking about the mother as the infant’s primary caregiver – one of his early texts said “little will be said of the father-child relation; his value as the economic and emotional support of the mother will be assumed.” He went on to write that a child will “attach himself especially to one figure,” and since the father was irrelevant, that figure must be the mother.

If we believe that the mother’s relationship with the baby is sacred, then daycare becomes virtually intolerable. Bowlby himself wrote that ““to deprive a small child of his mother’s companionship is as bad as depriving him of vitamins.” I reviewed the effects of daycare on children and the research base does not support Bowlby’s ideas. In fact, if daycare or preschool reduce stress for the mother and/or allow her to return to a job she enjoys, the net benefit of daycare and preschool is likely positive.  Unless your child is in daycare for more than about 70 hours a week—much more than most children—and is spending nights away from home, being in daycare is unlikely to affect their relationship with you.

Very late in his life Bowlby acknowledged that the the attachment system “contributes to the individual’s survival by keeping him or her in touch with one or more caregivers” (note the S on the end of “caregivers”), but this time the damage was done: A mother’s place was in the home with the child.

Parents: Relax!

So what can we learn from all of this? Well, we can remember that Attachment Parenting isn’t the same as Attachment Theory, and only the first one has any scientific research behind it at all. Being separated from your child—even if they are spending a full working week in daycare—is unlikely to lead to your attachment relationship being disrupted. And even if the attachment relationship is disrupted, it doesn’t necessarily lead directly to bad outcomes. The majority of children who don’t have a secure attachment relationship with a parent go on to do quite well in life, and even those who do don’t have an assured outcome. So we can all relax a bit, knowing that we’re doing the best we can with the skills we have, and for the majority of babies, this is probably just right.

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Jen Lumanlan fills the gaps in her parenting intuition through research, via a Master’s in Psychology (Child Development) and another in Education.  Her podcast, Your Parenting Mojo, provides rigorous yet accessible information on parenting and child development to help parents tame the overwhelm and raise resilient, thriving children.

In honor of Mother’s Day, we’re putting the spotlight on 23 influential women/working moms in SoCal who inspire us with their vision, missions, products, service to the community, work ethic, imagination, strength, fortitude and more. From Vanessa Bryant to the mother at the helm of Dr. Seuss Enterprises, and the founder of Baby Tula to the founder of The Honest Kitchen, read on to be wowed by local moms who are changing the world for the better.

Vanessa Bryant

Mamba & Mambacita Sports Foundation

Vanessa Bryant recently experienced an unimaginable tragedy––yet she’s continuing a legacy to help others. Her husband, Lakers basketball legend Kobe Bryant, and daughter Gianna, died in a helicopter crash in January 2020. In the wake of their death, she has renamed Kobe Bryant's charity organization the Mamba & Mambacita Sports Foundation, honoring 13 year-old Gianna, whose nickname was Mambacita. The Foundation is focused on creating a positive impact through sports and aims to help kids in underprivileged communities develop learning skills, enhance character traits and expand personal values that empower and inspire self-confidence. 

Susan Brandt, President of Dr. Seuss Enterprises, L.P.

Susan Brandt

Working alongside the visions of Dr. Seuss is something that would inspire any parent. For Susan Brandt, it’s all about sharing the wonder of Dr. Seuss’ world and making kids and their families happy. She loves bringing joy to kids, whether by introducing a new generation to Ted Geisel’s (Dr. Seuss's) wonderful stories and characters with books or by bringing families together to enjoy his films and television shows. Brandt is also the mother of two sons: Liam James, 19, and Aidan Patrick, 17. She enjoys spending time with her kids playing games and exercising together. She’s proud of having raised two boys as wonderful, caring and compassionate young adults.

Kathryn Cloward, Founder and CEO of Kandon Unlimited, Inc. 

Kathryn Cloward

Kathryn Cloward, also known as “Kathryn the Grape," wears many hats. Cloward is an award-winning book series author, performing songwriter, media publisher and producer, director, entrepreneur and mother. She founded her award-winning media company, Kandon Unlimited, Inc., in 2010 to independently publish the series of children’s books she wrote featuring “Kathryn the Grape®.” Since then, Kandon Unlimited has expanded to become a full spectrum media publishing and production company. Cloward admits that she is inspired daily by her 13 year-old son, Landon, as well as ordinary, everyday moments. As a parent, she tries to be mindful about not over-scheduling, and enjoying spending time simply being together. Aside from Landon being her greatest pride and joy, Cloward is extremely proud of the positive impact she has made through her books and songs. 

Shanna Nelson, President, Jazzercise, Inc.

Shanna Nelson

Shanna Nelson is inspired that the work Jazzercise does helps people lead healthier and happier lives, and she witnesses this in every class they teach. As president of the company, Nelson loves that Jazzercise has provided thousands of opportunities for women business owners through their franchises. “I feel really lucky that I get to not only oversee the business and programming side, but also teach the program myself as I’ve been an instructor since I was 18!” said Nelson. She is also a mother of two daughters: Skyla, 17 and Sienna, 14. Now that her daughters are older, she can see how they value education, being kind to people, their strong values and morals, and she takes a deep breath and thinks all the hard work, sitting through homework, conversations and “being there” for them has paid off.

Ula Tuszewicka, Founder and President, Baby Tula

Baby Tula

Baby Tula was born out of a practical need. After Ula Tuszewicka’s daughter, Amelia, was born, she and her husband, Mike, wore her predominantly in a sling and loved how convenient babywearing was for both parents. When their son was born a few years later, they discovered the ease of ergonomic carriers. After trying several that didn’t quite work, they asked a family member to sew one for their specifications and it was perfect. Ula and Mike continued to make baby carriers for family and friends. They eventually turned the passion project into a business and created Baby Tula in order to fulfill their mission to promote babywearing worldwide. Ula oversees the company, while also being a mom to three kids!

Lucy Postins, Founder and President of The Honest Kitchen

Lucy Postins

Although she's the founder and president of The Honest Kitchen, Lucy Postins didn’t start with the goal of creating a pet food company. In 2002, in an effort to help her Rhodesian Ridgeback, Mosi, with ear infections and skin problems, Postins started mixing up fresh ingredients in her kitchen to create a raw food diet. When she saw how much Mosi’s health improved on the new recipes, Postins realized she could help other pets as well, and The Honest Kitchen was born. All the ingredients are human grade, minimally processed, organic when possible, sustainable and the end product is a labor of love. She oversees company operations while still making time to be a mother to her children.

Lynne Banach, Founder and Creative Director, Sakura Bloom

Sakura Bloom

Lynne Banach is proud of being a small business owner that makes her products right in their San Diego studio. The mission of Sakura Bloom is to simplify and beautify modern parenting through the use of baby carriers made out of exquisite natural fibers, including organic Irish linens, Indian dupioni silks and southeast Asian wild silks. The hand-crafted artisan baby slings are designed for infants all the way up to 45-pound toddlers. Banach partners with local artisans and family run businesses like hers that share the same values and goals. When she’s not brainstorming new ideas and implementing them, she spends her time as mom to her two children, Teja and Jai.

Judy Forrester, CEO of The New Children's Museum

Judy Forrester

Judy Forrester joined The New Children’s Museum in 2015 to lead one of San Diego’s most unique educational and artistic institutions, while establishing a sustainable business model for the museum. She will be leaving her position this summer after significant accomplishments to the downtown mainstay. Museum attendance has grown more than 40 percent on her watch. They’ve also grown their program and exhibition space, increased the budget, and because of a community outreach expansion program, 25 percent of attendees visit the museum for free or significantly reduced cost. Forrester achieved all this while also being a mother to three children.

Juliana Flores, Owner of Pachis Art Studio

Juliana Flores

Juliana Flores started Pachis Art Studio as a brick-and-mortar store with a single mission: to support the healthy development of art in kids. Unlike other art programs, Pachis is focused on teaching kids life skills through art making and exploration, with curriculum designed with important elements for a little one’s personal development. Recently, she transitioned to an online forum and sells art kits to foster creativity. Juliana and her husband, Cesar, moved to San Diego from Tijuana, Baja California in 2009. They now live in Linda Vista with their 3 year-old and newborn daughters. Juliana believes having a business geared towards kids has helped her tremendously to create a balance between being a business owner and mom. When she’s not working, she enjoys going to the beach and picnics, doing art and having deep conversations with her little one.

Christy Heiskala, Victim Advocate

Christy Heiskala

Christy Heiskala gave up a long and lucrative career to start anew, teaching child sexual abuse prevention and advocating for victims. As a victim advocate, this La Mesa mom helps parents navigate the very complicated process if their child has been a victim of negligence or abuse. She is also a Court Appointed Special Advocate (CASA) for kids whose parents are going through dependency court. Her passion grew out of advocating for the conviction of a local teacher who was molesting his second and third grade students for seven years. Christy worked tirelessly to assure the instructor had his teaching credential revoked, ensuring countless kids be spared. Christy lives in La Mesa with her husband, biological daughter (Jaiden); step-daughter (Kaya); and step-son (Lee).

Shannon Higgins, Founder of Studio Barre

Shannon Higgins

Shannon Higgins, a South Carlsbad mom of three, is a true warrior. She merged her passion of fitness and business to create Studio Barre, a national ballet barre-based workout studio and franchise. She’s also extremely proud to be a breast cancer survivor after undergoing chemotherapy and two surgeries. While Shannon credits the doctors for treating her, she is happy she never let the disease get her down and that she was able to keep her family life as normal as possible. She also started a blog to educate and share her journey. Shannon opened her first Studio Barre studio when her youngest son, Joey, started kindergarten with the vision of creating a “happy place” for women to not only workout, but also hang out.

Carly Garrett, Teacher and Girl Scout Troop Leader

Carly Garrett

Carly Garrett wears many hats. This Western La Mesa/Rolando mom of two (Ethan and Maddie) is a teacher of a continuation high school. She spends her days helping students in danger of being high school dropouts, a job in which she was named District Teacher of the Year. She also started the Palomar Scholarship Foundation, a non-profit organization that provides financial assistance to kids from her high school who are often the first in their families to go to college. However, her proudest “hat” is serving as the leader of Girl Scout Troop 6190 of La Mesa for nine years and counting. Carly admits being a part of the 17 Girl Scouts’ lives is one of the greatest honors of her life. They do thousands of hours of community service and five of her troop members earned the Presidential Volunteer Service Medal from President Obama in the past two years. Carly likes to remind people to buy cookies from the older girls (other than the younger girls) because “big girls” have big dreams and goals too.

Cathy Nguyen, Health Educator at California State University, San Marcos

Cathy Nguyen

For more than 20 years, Cathy Nguyen has been educating, advocating and empowering college students to lead healthy lifestyles and make responsible choices through various health promotion programs. She also volunteers as a sexual assault response team (SART) advocate for Center for Community Solutions, a non-profit that operates the only rape crisis center in the city of San Diego along with a countywide 24-hour bilingual crisis helpline. This San Marcos mom has two kids: Tristan and Kaitlyn, both of whom are budding entrepreneurs. In addition to working full time, volunteering and being a mom and wife, Cathy is the co-founder of several online businesses that distribute to Amazon. She and her family are big Disney fans and are working on their goal of visiting all the Disneyland parks in the world. So far, they’ve visited four out of six parks, and are already planning their trips to the Shanghai and Hong Kong parks.

Michelle Lomelin, Founder of Sweet Petite Confections

Michelle Lomelin

Michelle Lomelin launched Sweet Petite Confections after leaving a two-decade career in fashion design. In her role as chocolatier and shop owner, Michelle creates and sells bonbons, meltaways, barks, salted caramels, custom chocolate business cards and ice cream, and teaches candy-making classes to families. Michelle lives in Bay Park with her two sons, Santiago and Kaleo, and started Sweet Petite Confections so she could make her own schedule, while being a mom and business owner at the same time. After overcoming the fear of “What if …” she’s launched a successful business, and at the same time, can attend field trips and teach art in her kids’ classrooms.

Jennifer Tandy, Owner/Founder of Nightingale Music Studios

Jennifer Tandy

Nightingale Music School was born out of Jennifer Tandy’s strengths in music and a love of kids. This former professional musical theater actress started with a small "mommy and me" music class out of her home, which turned into a successful business in the Bird Rock community that has served thousands of families in San Diego over the last 14 years. Jennifer also successfully launched satellite locations in South Park and La Mesa. Aside from her love of music, Jennifer is a strong advocate for public education and has advocated for her cluster of local schools. As a result of her advocacy, many schools have the strongest academic and enrichment programs in San Diego County. In turn, her work reshaping public schools has changed the community as well, and was recognized by being named the Honorary Mayor of Pacific Beach for the year 2014. When she’s not teaching music and running Nightingale, Jennifer enjoys camping trips or a National Park visits with her husband and three children. She credits her three children as her creative, musical inspiration.

Music Watson, Chief Communications Officer, San Diego County Office of Education

Music Watson

This Del Cerro mom is responsible for bringing classrooms into living rooms. As the Chief Communications Officer for San Diego County Office of Education, Music Watson is passionate about the power of public education to change the lives of individuals and whole families. She describes her job as using different media vehicles to help connect two audiences. The first is the 70 percent of California's voters who don't have kids in K-12 public schools, and the second are parents like Music whose daughter, Michaela, is in public school. Music credits her parents for helping her be successful in her career. “Until they retired, my dad was a blue collar worker and my mom was a school secretary,” said Music. “Neither of them earned a four-year college degree. I'm really proud of the hard work I put in––with their encouragement and support––that saw me through college and graduate school, and now to a successful career. I owe them a debt of gratitude for the decisions they made that led me to have access to high-quality education, and I'm proud of the fact that I pay that forward through my job.”

Salina Yoon, Author and Illustrator

Salina Yoon

Salina Yoon is an award-winning and bestselling author and illustrator of more than 160 books for kids. She travels to book festivals, conferences, bookstores, and schools all around the country to share her books and inspire the love of reading and writing and literacy. While her “Penguin” picture book series has been the most popular, she is most proud of the book “Be A Friend,” which celebrates individuality, encourages self-acceptance and promotes kindness and friendship. One of Salina’s proudest accomplishments is something that many moms can relate to. As a work-at-home mom, Salina was always sharing her creative space with family. So one day, she claimed a room and made it her own personal reading and writing space. She encourages all moms to claim a space of their own in their home. Salina lives in the San Elijo Hills community of San Marcos with her husband Chris Polentz (also an artist), and their two sons, Max and Mason. She has yet to outgrow her love of reading to her sons before bedtime.

Leng Caloh, Former Technology and Innovation Manager at KPBS

Leng Caloh

Aside from spending time with PBS characters like Daniel Tiger, Leng Caloh’s career can be described as bringing technology and people together in ways that educate and inspire — whether it’s technology for public use, or technology to help KPBS public broadcast staff better serve the public. Leng made an unexpected name for herself in 2007 when she led the KPBS web team in covering the October 2007 wildfires online, using Twitter (back when hardly anyone knew what it was) and Google MyMaps (which was just a few months old at the time). While that was a challenging week for everyone in San Diego, both professionally and personally (Leng hardly saw her toddler daughter), it changed the course of her career, and started KPBS on the path towards converging its radio, television and web news coverage. Personally, this Bonita mom is proud of her decision to have a home birth VBAC with her second daughter, after her first was born breech in a planned caesarian. Leng and her wife are proud parents of three kids: Siddha, Ananda and Treonte.

Amy Cullinan, Scientist, STEM Advocate and Communications Professional

Amy Cullinan

Originally from the Midwest, Amy Cullinan describes herself as a scientist, turned communications professional, work-at-home mechanical engineer, who has been married ten years to a San Diego native. This Rancho San Diego mom has one daughter, Samantha, who is in the first grade. She currently manages social media for Illumina, a global biotechnology company headquartered in San Diego, and was previously a science and technical writer. Before that, she was a research scientist investigating viruses and the human immune system. Amy is moved by helping the next generation discover what they want to do, and is proud that she built the social media program from the ground up, for one of the smartest companies in the world. She loves spending time with her daughter, inspiring her to learn about science through “Science Sundays,” which Amy team-teaches through a group of like-minded friends.

Kristen Elgo, National Events Manager for PIRCH

Kristen Elgo

Kristen Elgo’s mom hat touches every aspect of her life. She’s a full-time working mom, Boy Scouts and Girl Scouts mom, soccer mom, running mom, and volunteers at her kids’ elementary school. This Mira Mesa mom is coming up on 14 years of marriage to her college sweetheart, Mike, and has two kiddos: Branden and Kaileigh, and two mini daschunds, Sumo and Geisha. She has what many consider a dream job: creating fun executive events in PIRCH showrooms designed to show off all the amazing products and features at the company. One of her proudest personal accomplishments has been running over the last four years, and competing in 12 half marathons and the full Rock and Roll Marathon. While waking up at 5 a.m. for a regular running group meet-up is early, she always feels fulfilled after the hour.

Amanda Bonds, Senior Program Manager at Words Alive

Amanda Bonds

Amanda Bond’s mission is simple: to bring reading and books to all kids. She is the Program Manager for Words Alive, a literacy non-profit leading a movement to make reading matter in San Diego. This Hillcrest mom to 2 year-old Starling is most proud of starting the organization’s Family Literacy Program that empowers parents from under-served communities with confidence, techniques and materials to feel confident reading with their kiddos. On a personal level, Amanda and her husband, Tony (both transplants from Austin, TX), have had Sunday dinner with the same group of friends nearly every week for more than five years. She has worked hard to establish her “framily” (friend-family) and truly believes in the importance of connection and developing a support-system for each other as parents. And they love coming up with new recipes and eating delicious dinners once a week for five years.

Amanda Allen, Attorney

Amanda Allen

Amanda Allen is a business and real estate attorney (with a specialty in working with breweries and wineries), and she launched Enrich, a co-working space for lawyers. This mom to 3 year-old Jasmine Jane has been practicing law for eight years and started her solo practice when Jas was only one. Amanda is extremely proud of launching Enrich. While it felt outside of her comfort zone to do, she’s happier about that professional accomplishment than any award she’s received. While Amanda is a successful attorney, business owner and mom, she’s committed to living a healthy lifestyle. She loves doing crossfit, and says working out has been her therapy and her rock. Amanda’s favorite thing to do with Jasmine is dance, and they can be seen busting moves in the car, bagel shop, gym and in the living room.

Maggie Unzueta, Chef and Writer, Mama Maggie's Kitchen

Maggie Unzueta

Maggie Unzeta is passionate about authentic Mexican food, and about preserving and promoting the richness of her culture through cuisine. She shares the true flavors of Mexico to the United States and the world through her blog, Mama Maggie’s Kitchen. Throughout her life, she’s lived in different parts of Mexico and has traveled to 22 of the 31 states in Mexico and sampled the unique foods of each region. She’s also mom to a 12 year-old son. With Mama Maggie's Kitchen turning 10 this year, she has been a work-from-home mother since he was a small kiddo. She’s extremely proud of her blog and how its grown and flourished over the years, and believes her son and family are her biggest accomplishments.

—Leah R. Singer

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“What exactly is sexting?” one mom asked me the other day, with a hint of embarrassment. I assured her not to worry as the digital lexicon changes as fast as her preteen’s moods and energy levels. I explained that sexting is any sexually explicit content sent via text messaging, face timing, or video chatting – ranging from provocative poses to seminude or even nude pictures.

I know you may be thinking, sexting?…but she’s only ten years old! The truth is, although at this stage, she is merely obsessed with selfies, sexting is the selfie’s BFF and it’s on the rise amongst teens (both boys and girls). In other words, if she is posting, she is more likely to eventually sext. You need to be prepared and to prepare her for what’s ahead.

Why are girls sexting? Girls often feel pressured to sext as a way of pleasing and complying with requests from others (whom they are acquainted both in real life and online). Sexting is a means of feeling sexy and hot. Often, they use sexting and experimenting with sexy video chatting as a way to explore their sexuality safely. Sometimes, they do it as a joke or “just for fun” flirtation. Sometimes, not complying with a sexting request can result in rejection and social isolation – a real catastrophe for a growing girl. As Peggy Orenstein’s reports in her book, Girls & Sex, “Coercion into sexting appears to cause more long-term anxiety, depression, and trauma than coercion into real-life sex.” (p. 22). Unfortunately, sexting can be a gateway to sexual objectification, and even worse, sexual abuse or exploitation.

When I speak with parents about their daughter’s use of social media sites like Instagram, Snapchat, and the newly popular app called Sarahah where one can anonymously post “honest” feedback on others’ posts, I know they are worried. They struggle between wanting to give their daughters the freedom and privacy to cultivate independence and needing to protect them from the often dark and dangerous virtual world.

When I asked older girls why they sext, I received responses such as: “It’s fun, I want to fit in, it helps me feel sexy, and, if I don’t, I’ll be left out”. None of them admitted this but I sensed all of them are feeling the mounting pressure to text (and sext) as a means of feeling a sense of security in belonging and to feel good about their bodies.

Knowing sexting is fast becoming an integral, even expected part of a girl’s journey, how do we give her what she needs to prepare her for what’s ahead, even though she seems too young to be an active sexting participant? Here are some preventative strategies:

She needs open and honest communication; give her your time and presence: having consistent conversation with her may increase her comfort level as she learns to share what’s really on her mind and the true intricacies of her day. Talking time is beneficial to help her better understand who she is and who she is becoming and it’s especially advantageous when you have more heavy conversations such as the dangers and damage of sexting. Think about it – when you speak with her daily about the ups and downs of her life and approach these talks with open curiosity and empathetic understanding, you are creating a normalcy as in “this is how we do it.” Balanced conversations of talking and listening will have a natural ease. Subsequently, the time you spend with her is not only the planting the seeds of connection for when her life is made more complicated with the intricacies of sex, sexualization, and sexting, but you are giving her the presence she needs right now.

She needs attention; provide the right kind: It’s all too easy to compliment girls on what they look like, “I love your dress” and “You look so pretty today”, or to correct unacceptable behavior, “Don’t slouch” and “Please stop slamming your door.” What’s more challenging, yet more necessary, is positive attention, focused on the right stuff. We need to go deeper with her by looking beyond her body and seeing where she is thriving. Try complimenting her on how well she expressed her feelings, how she compromises with a friend on a play date so there is turn-taking, or how she’s being true to herself by playing tag with the boys at lunch instead of walking around and talking with the girls. At the same time, notice her successful choices and decisions such as when she chooses to go to bed at a reasonable time without technology time beforehand or when she opts out of watching a scary movie so she doesn’t have nightmares like last time.  When we give her quality attention and can take the time to ask her how these kinds of compliments feel, she will start to discern how different kinds of attention feels different. There is superficial attention that feels good at first, such as the request for a sext of her lying on her bed, but can leave her feeling empty and confused. And, then there is more meaningful attention that bolsters her like the request to help a friend with homework because she’s mastering math.

She needs to set and keep boundaries; teach her how. Two little words – “yes” and “no” can hold tremendous power as girls learn how to set boundaries. “Yes, I want to play with you and I am available.” “No, I don’t want to play today; I am not available.” When she’s little, we can start with easy requests like these – encouraging her to first consider what she wants and then provide her answer – kindly and firmly. When she’s older, and the requests feel more challenging and pressured, she’s already had the practice and can assert, “No, sexting you is not something I will do – how dare you ask.” Boundary setting teaches her she has value and worth and and that she can trust herself and learn what works for her and what feels best. Boundaries will keep her safe and clear about her own standards.

I know sexting may be a foreign concept for parents of young girls but it’s also a concept that needs consideration. As we strengthen girls by meeting their needs for authentic communication, healthy attention, and clear boundaries, we are preparing them for the more challenging parts of their journey and teaching them that they can feel good without the need to sext.

I am a girl advocate and girls champion; the founder of Bold New Girls, teaching and coaching for girls and their parents. As well, I am the author Growing Strong Girls and Rooted, Resilient, and Ready (available on Amazon and Audible). I am an international speaker and an instructor with Udemy.