Yup, kids say the cutest things—and it’s rarely on purpose. Some of the most memorable mispronunciations and creative phrasings happen when toddlers are learning to speak. In some cases, we’d love to freeze time and keep our kiddos asking for “strawbabies” forever, but what happens if these quirks continue beyond toddlerhood? How long is this phase developmentally appropriate, and when or for what types of speech issues should you seek professional help? We asked three speech-language pathologists to weigh in. 

What does a speech-language pathologist do?

Unless your kid’s speech has been brought to your attention—say, from a concerned teacher or a chat with your pediatrician—you’ve probably never heard of an SLP. A speech-language pathologist (SLP for short) works in many different areas related to language and sound development, says Becky Medley, MS, CCC-SLP. This includes early intervention, the earliest of which would be for infants having difficulty feeding and swallowing. 

Melinda W. Neal, MS, CCC-SLP, adds that an SLP assesses, diagnoses, and treats conditions in all ages and areas around language, speech and sound development, social communication, cognition, and dysphagia (swallowing) disorders. Once a particular issue is identified, they come up with a treatment plan that works best. With many play-based “tricks” in their bag for toddlers and little kids, a speech-language pathologist’s purpose can encompass a wide range of responsibilities, says Sarah Halpern, MS, CCC-SLP, and owner of Bright Speech LA

What sounds are developmentally appropriate?

When kids are learning to talk, it’s totally common to hear some rather creative pronunciations. Halpern explains that when it comes to speech development, certain sounds are considered age-appropriate at different stages. So, in 2-year-old-speak, substituting a “D” for an “L” sound (like “piddow” for “pillow”) is appropriate. It becomes a cause for concern when specific sounds don’t develop past the expected age range. “By the age of three, most children should have clear production of common consonants like p, b, m, n, and d,” she says. “By age four, additional sounds like s, l, z, and v are generally expected.”

Neal seconds this, adding that toddlers often mispronounce words and have a hard time formulating grammatically correct sentences. “When learning to talk, young children are exploring different ways of using the speech articulators, like their tongue, teeth, and lips,” she says, and speech-language development is never one-size-fits-all. Still, a kiddo’s speech should improve over time.  

When should parents consider a speech-language pathologist for their child?

While there’s no one sure way for your child’s speech and language to develop, there are signs that might tell you that early intervention speech therapy could be helpful. Halpern breaks it down like this: “If parents notice persistent issues or delays such as difficulty being understood by others, limited vocabulary, struggles with articulation, or delays in reaching expressive or receptive language milestones, it may indicate a need for speech therapy.” (Expressive language is the words children use to express themselves, and receptive language is what they understand.) 

Medley offers general guidelines to help parents and caregivers look out for possible issues with speech development. “At about a year, you should start hearing some single words, and at two years old children should be combining an average of two words. Then at three years old, you want them using an average of three words together.” So, if by two years your toddler hasn’t uttered popular phrases like “More puffs” or “More Blippy” it might be time to seek a speech assessment. 

To this point, Neal has compiled an easy-to-follow list of factors to help parents and caregivers decide if they should see an SLP: 

  • Difficult to understand: By 2 years old, toddlers should be understood by unfamiliar listeners at least 50% of the time. By 3 years old, toddlers should be understood 75% of the time. 
  • Speaks very little or not at all: By 2.5 years of age, toddlers should be understanding approximately 1000 words and using approximately 500 words. No, we don’t expect you to count them up (who has time for that?!), but you can tell if their speech and understanding are broad or more narrow.
  • Has trouble following simple directions: Toddlers should understand simple prepositions, be able to point to objects, answer simple “what” and “where” questions, respond to their spoken name, and identify an object’s location. 
  • Stutters and/or repeats words or parts of words: It’s normal to occasionally repeat words, however, if a young child is frequently repeating words or parts of words, it’s best to seek the advice of an SLP. 

What does a speech therapy session look like?

The good news is that speech therapy sessions are fun! Halpern says this means using games, toys, and age-appropriate activities to keep kids engaged while targeting specific speech and language goals. Medley agrees. “We’re playing and I’m modeling sound effects and speech,” she explains. This could mean rolling a ball back and forth and modeling single words such as “ready, set, go” or playing with cars and making horn sound effects (like beep, beep) in isolation so she can hear that consonant/vowel combination. “So, in very fun ways you can get kids to work on sounds, and give them lots of exposure in ways that don’t pressure them to perform,” she says. Most sessions last 30-45 minutes and are either one-on-one or group.

Both Medley and Halpern emphasize that parents have a role to play, too. Therapists will often suggest at-home activities to practice that reinforce the progress made in their playful sessions.

What’s the best way to seek out an SLP for your child?

Halpern suggests starting with your pediatrician or healthcare provider for some recommendations, adding that word of mouth can also be invaluable. “Reach out to friends, family, teachers, school directors, or other parents who may have experience with SLPs.” First-hand recommendations can help you find someone you like faster.  

Medley adds that you should check which speech programs are available in your state. “Once a child turns 3, they can assess speech through the school system.” Also, keep in mind that the wait for school programs and assessments can be long. “No matter the age, a parent may also seek assistance from the SLP by contacting local hospitals with outpatient services,” says Neal. “There are also various companies, such as Easterseals, that provide speech-language services.” 

Will insurance cover the costs of speech therapy?

The cost of your little one’s speech therapy depends on a bunch of factors, including your state and the type of coverage you have. Halpern says it’s essential for parents to check their specific insurance plan details and consult with their provider because many plans will cover part or all of speech therapy sessions, but co-pays (where you pay a set fee for each visit) and deductibles (the amount you pay before your insurance pays for covered expenses) differ. 

“Obtaining a referral from a pediatrician and keeping thorough records can streamline the process,” Halpern advises.” And if your coverage is limited, don’t worry; Halpern says many SLPs offer “private pay options” and if accepted by insurance can provide superbills (a list of services you have received) for reimbursement.

Final thoughts

All three experts encourage parents to trust their instincts regarding their kiddo’s speech. If you’re still not sure whether your tot needs a little extra help, Neal has a rule of thumb: if you’re concerned, speak to an SLP, even if it’s just to ease your mind. And if you were right, you’ll all learn how to communicate better. “One of the main things we do with early intervention is teach families how to teach language,” Medley says. “We forget speech is learned—it’s not something that just happens. And sometimes kids need a little more help.”

Wondering if your child’s speech sounds are on track for their age? Here’s what a speech and language pathologist has to say about it

While learning to talk is often a fun time in a child’s life, it can also be stressful, as parents find themselves wondering if their children are progressing at the right pace and meeting the right developmental benchmarks. But thanks to a speech and language pathologist on TikTok, we now have a much better idea of the speech sounds kids should be mastering at every age.

Moira, a speech pathologist with Rooted in Language, posted a video explaining how kids develop their language skills when they’re young.

“Let me first start by saying that we should not expect perfect articulation in kids in those first several years of life,” she said. “Between the ages of one and three, it’s very typical for many sounds to be produced incorrectly. In other words, a developing talker will make consistent substitutions for sounds and words. Kids do this because they’re substituting easier sounds for complex ones. It’s all part of learning how to control and make those finite, discrete, articulatory movements in the mouth.”

@rooted.in.language

Just teachin’ about speechin’. Reference: McLeod & Crowe (2018) #rootedinlanguage #talkingtoddlers #speechsounds #learningtotalk #slpsoftiktok #parenting #parentingtips #articulation #raisingtalkers #speechdevelopment #parentinglittles #slptips #speechtips #speechtherapy

♬ original sound – RootedinLanguage

She continued, “For a typical developing child, the number of substitutions they make will naturally decrease as they age. They kind of clean up on their own, so to speak. And the most articulatorily complex sounds are generally corrected last, as you might expect. So, parents, you should expect perfect or near-perfect articulation of all speech sounds by about the age of six. My personal rule of thumb is by a child’s fourth birthday, their speech should sound about 98% correct, allowing a little extra time for “R” and “TH.”

So with that, here are the speech sounds Moira says kids should have down pat by each age. She notes that these are what 95% of kids should have mastered by the time they turn each of these ages, so keep in mind that kids will develop these skills gradually and at different times, loosely around these guidelines.

By age 2, kids should be able to make “p” sounds.

By age 3, they should be able to make “b, d, t, m, n, ng, k, g, f, y, h, and w” sounds.

By age 4, “s, z, ch, j, sh, v, and l” sounds.

By age 5, “r, th, and zh” sounds.

What if your kid isn’t hitting these speech sound benchmarks? Moira notes that if they aren’t nailing them, don’t be afraid to ask for some guidance and possibly consider speech therapy. It’s fun, and kids these ages typically make fast progress and then have no other speech or literacy issues later in life.

A speech-language pathologist (and mom) shares if (and when) parents should be concerned about delayed language development

As parents, it’s natural to worry about our children’s development every step of the way. During storytime, we notice toddlers of the same age beginning to walk. At daycare pickup, we overhear kiddos with a vocabulary wider than that of our own child. In a world where perfection is celebrated, it is difficult not to compare our child’s development to that of his or her peers—but we should try not to. As both a mother and a speech-language pathologist (SLP), this is what I’d like parents of babies and toddlers to know about late language emergence.

Understanding Language Development

Language development begins the moment we start interacting with our child. Back-and-forth interaction during the first year sets the foundation for later development of language. I often recall the viral video of a father and his baby taking turns during conversation. His son may not be saying words just yet, but by allowing him the opportunity to babble in response, he’s learning the rules of back-and-forth conversation. This father sets a great example of what parents should be doing to enhance their child’s language development from an early age.

When I had my own children, I saw language development through the parental lens for the first time. I realized that language acquisition doesn’t always correlate to a perfect timeline. I anxiously awaited my son’s first word when he turned one, with the milestone chart at the forefront of my mind, as a clinician typically does. But not every child has a word by his first birthday. Not every kiddo is combining words by the time she’s two. And in some cases, that’s okay. Each child is unique, and so is his or her development. Ranges of acquisition leave some wiggle room for children to develop at their own pace.

Milestones to Look for in Language Development

Milestones are helpful if we consider them to be general guidelines and not solidified expectations. According to The Children’s Hospital of Philadelphia, babies begin to repeat sounds and vocalize when they’re spoken to around the age of 4 to 6 months. Babbling, communicating through gestures, and responding to requests picks up between 7 to 11 months. Words begin to develop around 12 to 17 months, and between 18 to 23 months a typical vocabulary is approximately 50 words. Towards the end of this period, toddlers begin to combine words into phrases, and by 2 to 3 years they’re typically using sentences.

Often, we see children falling beyond these ranges as a sign of a speech/language disorder. But there are some instances where a child’s vocabulary may grow at a slower rate than expected; this is not always a reason for concern.

What if You Have a Late Talker?

When late language emergence is a concern, without other diagnosed disabilities or developmental delays, a child may be referred to as a “late talker.” Typically, late talkers have acquired less words or a smaller vocabulary (expressive language) than what is expected, but parents report that their language comprehension (receptive language) is intact. For example, a child may struggle to ask for his sippy cup, but when his parents say, “Go upstairs and get your blanket,” he can follow the instruction without difficulty.

Being a late talker with an expressive language delay does not necessarily mean a child will go on to be diagnosed with a language disorder. In fact, a subset of children who have a late language emergence, or a delay in language onset without other diagnosed disabilities or delays, will catch up on their own. However, seeking an evaluation is recommended because it’s difficult to distinguish these children from the rest. It should be noted that children delayed in both expressive and receptive language are at greater risk for a language disorder than those whose comprehension skills are in the normal range.

The Benefits of Early Intervention

Children ages birth to three (and in some states until age five) can receive fully funded speech-language evaluations and therapy (upon qualification) through early intervention. A professional may refer a child for a speech-language evaluation, but parents do not have to wait for a referral to reach out themselves. Eligibility for early intervention varies by state, but in general, if a child has significant developmental delays in one or more areas, they will qualify for services.

Speech therapy can only aid in speech-language development; it can’t hurt in any way. An evaluation ensures that any on-going speech-language issues are discovered early so that therapy can allow for the best possible outcome later. When in doubt, have your child evaluated; there’s truly no reason not to. The CDC can aid in locating an early intervention program near you, if you’re not sure where to start.

Just Remember…

I hope parents remember that children acquire new skills in their own time. We should only compare our child’s development to their previous gains, while also paying attention to ranges of typical development. Comparison to other children often leads to unnecessary stress and inaccurate assessments.

As a mother of two boys who were both late talkers and who both received speech support through early intervention, I realize that deviation from expectations doesn’t always mean a disorder is present. But as an SLP, I also know that we can’t always determine which children will catch up on their own and which won’t. A referral to early intervention services is always recommended when parents are unsure if a need exists. The benefits of early intervention are undeniable, and we want to take advantage of that precious time.

Don’t stress over your child’s every word. Remember that each child is individual, and just like their ability to crawl and walk, they may not speak exactly when the milestone chart says they should. Also know that it is okay—and expected—for parents to be unsure of their child’s need for speech therapy. Referring your child to early intervention allows specialists to determine that for you. An evaluation through early intervention is available at no cost. There are SLPs ready to work with your child at every stage of development, and that may be exactly what your child needs to flourish.

Experts recommend 6-8 well-baby visits during the first year. If you’re thinking, what’s up, doc, you’re not alone. Read on to find out what to expect from each doctor’s appointment, what you should bring and how to get the most out of your visit.

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What to Bring with You

Reference documents: driver’s license, insurance card, hospital documents from baby’s birth, information about family members’ health history and allergies

Baby necessities: burp cloths, extra diapers and wipes (the doctor will remove baby’s diaper), hand wipes, baby bottle, a blanket in case baby gets cold, a lovey or favorite stuffed animal, a pacifier if you use them

Mom necessities: an extra shirt in case of spit-up, water and a snack in case you have to wait for the doctor. Once your baby is eating solids, bring snacks for them too.

Questions: Keep a list on your phone or in a small notebook so you can jot down questions when you think of them. Bring a printed version of the questions to your appointment so you don’t forget anything and can write down your doctor’s answers.

What Happens at a Well-Baby Pediatrician Appointment

Each appointment will vary depending on baby’s age, but here's what you can expect:

Measurement of your baby’s height, weight and head circumference to monitor your child’s growth curve; plus a discussion of that curve

A head-to-toe physical exam, including eyes, ears (and hearing), mouth, neck, skin, heart, lungs, abdomen, hips, genitalia and legs

A discussion of your child’s physical and cognitive development

Vaccinations, at most visits, if you’ve chosen them

Time for you to ask questions and bring up concerns

Read on for specifics of each visit.

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Day 3-5 Well-Baby Visit

In the first week of your child’s life, pediatricians will do a physical exam; measure baby’s height, weight and head circumference; and observe baby’s behavior, reactions and reflexes.

Don’t sweat it: It’s common for babies to lose some body weight after birth. They typically gain it back by the time they hit two weeks old. As your doctor tracks your child's physical growth and tells you which percentile they're in, remember that the actual numbers and percentages are usually less important than whether your child is growing steadily along their curve.

Topics to discuss:

SIDS and creating a safe sleep environment

How often and how much your child eats

Frequency of wet diapers and bowel movements, and what bowel movement look like

Your child’s growth curve

 

1-Month Well-Baby Visit

At this visit, in addition to taking measurements, doing a physical exam and checking development, your doctor may give your child a second hepatitis B shot (they typically received the first right after birth).

Don’t sweat it: It’s normal for your child (and you!) to cry when they get shots. Shots are typically done at the end of the visit so you can comfort your child with cuddles and nursing or a bottle before you leave.

Topics to discuss:

○ What to do if your child is inconsolable in the evenings (aka the witching hours)

If your child is dealing with diaper rashes, baby acne or cradle cap, the doctor can give you advice on how to treat these conditions

How often you're doing tummy time

Whether your child needs vitamin D drops

How your baby is sleeping

How often and how much your child feeds

Frequency of wet diapers and bowel movements, and what bowel movements look like. Hard, dry poop could indicate constipation, and mucousy, soft stools can signal a food intolerance.

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2-Month Well-Baby Visit

Your child will likely receive immunizations at this visit, if you've chosen them. The doctor will also check your baby’s head control and posture.

Don’t sweat it: Some babies feel discomfort in the day or two after shots, so be prepared to notice a change in your child’s behavior and energy level. Offer extra cuddles and comfort, and clear your schedule if you can.

Topics to discuss:

If your child is dealing with colic, constipation, diaper rashes, baby acne, reflux, sleep or feeding issues, the doctor can give you advice

Whether your child needs vitamin D drops

How your baby is sleeping

How often and how much your child feeds

Frequency of wet diapers and bowel movements, and what bowel movements look like

Whether your baby smiles yet

How you characterize your baby’s temperament. If your child seems weepy, restless or uncomfortable, your doctor can explore possible causes

How you’re feeling. If you’re experiencing postpartum depression or anxiety, you should bring it up to your child’s doctor and your own.

 

4-Month Well-Baby Visit

Your child will receive more immunizations, if you've chosen them, and may receive a hemoglobin screening to test for anemia. The doctor will also begin looking for, and discussing with you, age-appropriate milestones for your child.

Don’t sweat it: Babies develop at their own pace, so don’t assume the worst if your child hasn’t reached a certain milestone. Tell your doctor if your child is losing skills they once had or if you’re concerned about any aspect of their development (like crawling, talking, hearing, eyesight).

Topics to discuss:

Whether your child needs vitamin D drops

How your baby is sleeping

How often and how much your child feeds

Frequency of wet diapers and bowel movements, and what bowel movements look like

Age-appropriate milestones, such as whether your child can roll over, sit up with support, push up from their belly, grab items and kick with both legs.

Whether your baby communicates by babbling, squealing, laughing, copying caregivers’ facial expressions and sounds

 

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6-Month Well-Baby Visit

More standard tests and (sorry) immunizations. Your doctor may also do a lead screening, as older homes can have lead paint, which, in high doses, can be harmful to babies. Your child may also receive a tuberculosis test and, if any teeth have popped through, your doctor will want to see them. Since babies are likely to crawl soon, it’s a good time to talk to your doctor about ways to childproof your home.

Don’t sweat it: Childproofing your home doesn’t have to mean spending a lot of money. Here are 14 DIY babyproofing tricks to make your home safe as your baby gets more mobile.

Topics to discuss:

If it’s time to start your child on solid food. And, if so, which foods your doctor recommends

If your child has teeth, how you should care for them

Age-appropriate milestones, such as whether your child is rolling over in both directions, sitting up without support, showing interest in their environment, babbling and imitating sounds and expressions

Whether your baby needs vitamin D drops

How your baby is sleeping

How often and how much your child feeds

Frequency of wet diapers and bowel movements, and how bowel movements change after introducing solid foods

 

9-Month Well-Baby Visit

In addition to the standard tests, a review of baby’s oral health and perhaps immunizations, your doctor will look more closely at your baby’s development. The doctor will likely ask you questions about how your child moves and interacts with you.

Don’t sweat it: If your child has any developmental delays, your pediatrician can give you valuable resources. Early intervention in the form of physical therapy or speech therapy can help your child develop new skills.

Topics to discuss:

Age-appropriate milestones, such as crawling, saying words, responding to their name, pointing, using the pincer grip, feeding themselves, playing games with you or others

If your child is experiencing separation anxiety or fear of strangers

How you should care for your child’s teeth

Whether your baby needs vitamin D drops or gets enough from solid foods

How your baby is sleeping

How often and how much your child eats (breastmilk/formula and solids)

Frequency of wet diapers and bowel movements, and what bowel movements look like

 

12-Month Well-Baby Visit

You’re a pro at this point and know what to expect at these doctor visits. But as you've learned with babies, they're always learning new things and changing their routines, so you'll have lots to discuss at this and future appointments.

Don’t sweat it: You’ve almost made it through year one, with all the big changes and sleeplessness that goes along with it. You can handle whatever year two throws at you.

Topics to discuss:

Age-appropriate milestones, such as whether your child is pulling themselves up, cruising along furniture, walking, pointing, saying words, responding to what you say, playing games with you or others

How you should care for your child’s teeth

Whether you should introduce cow's milk into baby's diet

Whether your baby needs vitamin D drops or gets enough from solid foods

How your baby is sleeping

How often and how much your child eats (breastmilk/formula and solids)

Frequency of wet diapers and bowel movements, and what bowel movements look like

 

 

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Words. They matter.

I spent the better part of my post-high school academic career studying the written and spoken word and how those words matter.

I also have three children who struggled to find their voices. They have worked through intensive speech therapy to be able to find and use words.

The power of a word is not lost on me.

I teach my kids to think before they speak. Is it kind? Is it truthful? Is it necessary? If they can’t answer all of those questions with a yes then maybe they should think about saying whatever it is before they do.

This is why it bothers me so much when people say, “They are only words.”

Words have power.

The way we talk to people isn’t a reflection of them as much as it is a reflection of ourselves. The way we talk to and about our children becomes their inner voice.

I’ve had this on my mind a lot for a few months now. It seems like in our current culture it has become a social norm to be a “keyboard warrior” online and to excuse really, really awful behavior because “they are only words.”

I really got to thinking about this last night after what turned into a heated social media discussion, if we can call it that, with someone I respected. I generally try not to engage and avoid hot button issues—especially when I know the other parties aren’t particularly receptive to different points of view. I know it was 100% it was my fault for kicking the proverbial bee’s nest, but it was most certainly not a respectful discussion on either side. I am not too proud to admit it wasn’t a good look for either of us.

Follow me as I dig a little deeper.

It isn’t just the written word that matters. It isn’t just what we see each other write online that matters. It’s true that social media has empowered a lot of us to say things that we wouldn’t necessarily say to someone’s face and we should think before we type, but we also need to think before we speak.

The power of a word.

There have been moments in my life where words have been really influential on me: The words contained in the acceptance letter to my dream college. My husband asking me to marry him. My Grandmother’s marriage advice. My Dad’s wedding toast to my husband and me. The first time my children told me they loved me. Any time someone told me “You can’t.”

I also can think of moments where words didn’t just have an impact on me, but also on my view of the world or someone in it.

Once, after the birth of a new baby, some relatives came to visit and meet him. One of them had been wanting a baby of her own and working their way through the options. She mentioned how she was slightly discouraged because another family they knew had received another foster placement while she was still longing for her first. Her husband responded with a remark about how that child had autism and that family was able to get another child because they were willing to “take whatever garbage was thrown at them.”

Now, it was a passing conversation and the people involved probably don’t remember it, but I do. Six months later as my oldest son received an autism diagnosis, it resurfaced in my mind. It took up space and it lives there. Every interaction this person has with my child, his words come to mind.

A few summers back a new family moved into our neighborhood. My girls were thrilled to have more kids their age to play with. It was great at first. They played frequently and I was all for it until I started to hear the way these children were speaking. They were being mean to my girls and thinking they were funny.

Their words weren’t welcome and it was tough to navigate, but my girls learned they needed to speak up for themselves, but also to believe in themselves and they were worthy and capable of great things.

Around the time of my first son’s ASD diagnosis I reached out to the few mamas I knew with children on the spectrum. I was lost and looking for guidance. Out of them, most were encouraging, offered support, and gave some advice. One, however, told me to get over it and not make it about myself. She had nothing to offer and I would figure it out just as she had.

That stung and put a wall in our friendship. I often think about her words when I am sharing my perspective on our life with the spectrum. I hope should another mama ever come to me looking for a lifeline as I had been that I remember her counsel and offer better.

These are only a few examples of the power of words, but they were impactful enough to bear mention. They were said in passing and have an echo that remains.

Lately, this world doesn’t seem built for kindness. To have a soft heart or to admit your hurt almost instantly is met with more insult or a suggestion to “toughen up.” I don’t agree with that, but I am also not saying that we should all walk around in bubble wrap with fragile egos and tiptoe around people. But maybe, speak less and think more before you do.

Is it kind? Is it truthful? Is it necessary? If our answer is no to any of these questions, then maybe we need to rethink our words.

The old childhood rhyme “Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me,” comes to mind. Maybe words can’t break a bone or cause visible damage, but words do in fact matter. Words can break and words can damage.

Words have power.

It’s up to you whether or not you use your words for good.

Choose your words wisely.

 

This post originally appeared on How Many Monkeys Are Jumping On the Bed?.

Marisa McLeod lives in Waterville, Ohio, with her husband and four kids. She's a Golden Girls, Disney, and organizational junkie. She can usually be found sipping coffee (or wine), watching reality television, or Pinterest-dreaming her next adventure. You can follow along with her on her blog How Many Monkeys Jumping on the Bed, Facebook, or on Instagram.

Does your child need extra help with their speech therapy services? While school and private therapy provide primary ways to practice and make changes, your child may need more. Here’s where the new TikTalk2Me app comes in!

TikTalk is a new program for children in kindergarten through grade six, available on iOS and Android. Your kiddo’s school or private speech-language pathologist (SLP) activates and guides the app, customizing the app experience.

photo: Julia M. Cameron via Pexels

The app includes engaging video games to encourage at-home practice. Nir Gamliel, U.S. head of business development at TikTalk2me, said in a press release, “This is the most intuitive, engaging and customized speech program available for use on millions of portable devices.” Gamliel continued, “In our efforts to make TikTalk even more accessible, it is now available in the app store.  It’s time that patients, parents and SLPs reap the benefits of futuristic therapy today.”

Sandra Laserson, M.A. CCC-SLP, an Ohio-based SLP in private practice who helped develop TikTalk, added, “Some apps are good for encouraging practice. But I never knew how much practice was being done, how accurate sounds were being produced and had limited mechanisms at my disposal to report the success.”

Find TikTalk in the Apple Store here and on Google Play here.

—Erica Loop

 

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banana bread

This month marks the one-year “anniversary” of Dominic being home full-time from school. When the pandemic started, I guess I was very optimistic and thought it would only last a few weeks. Little did I know, that almost a year later, the pandemic would still be raging on.

It has been of a bit of a “learning curve” having Dominic here and my husband working from home (the hubby likes to call it a “preview” of what it will be like when he retires)!! We have worked out a good system, so one of us is always home with Dominic. He can’t be left alone because of his Complex Partial Epilepsy. He has had six seizures since the pandemic started, the most recent one was the beginning of January.

Since we have had lots of extra time in our schedule, in June of 2020, we went from once-a-week private speech therapy to twice-a-week. It has been a pretty seamless transition from in-person to “virtual” learning with her. His private speech therapist has moved away from worksheets and started to concentrate heavily on “work/life skills.” It was her suggestion to start to have Dominic bake for her and then she would pay him for his finished baked product. We really wanted him to make that connection.

I started to wonder if we could bake for other people and make it into a “business.” I started to comb the internet for information and found that Michigan has something called a “Cottage Food Law.” I did some research and then sat on the information for a while. It was several pages of rules and regulations (very overwhelming and intimidating at first). I began to think long-term and after finding a free on-line workshop on running a “Cottage Food” business and registering for it (the workshop wasn’t until December), I decided to move forward. I already had tons of recipes at my disposal on my food blog, so I knew that I wouldn’t need to be continually testing out new recipes! I then began to think that we probably should come up with a name and a logo. This is where an artist friend of mine, that I had used for classes for the disability ministry came into the picture. I asked him if he could start private art lessons with Dominic (even though Dominic had shown zero interest at previous art events with the disability ministry).

Dominic started his weekly private art lessons in August of 2020 and except for a few times, he has been going steadily every week! It has been amazing to watch his self-confidence grow!!  A few months into the lessons, I asked if Dominic could start designing a logo for the business. My artist friend agreed and we let Dominic make all the decisions about what it would look like, the colors, etc.  I even ordered a shirt with the logo on it for Dominic!

Anyways, we got our first order at the end of November and little by little, we started to get more orders. In the second week of December, a few days after the on-line workshop about running a “Cottage Food Business,” my Dad (who lived back in Maryland) went into the hospital with what we all thought was a minor infection. It turned out he was in end-stage congestive heart failure and my beloved dad passed away on December 17. I was devastated by his passing and it took me until a week or so into January before I felt like I could re-start the business.

A few weeks ago, we filed the name “Baked Goods By Dominic” with the local county clerk’s office and opened a bank account! Our family has had an outpouring of support and Dominic just delivered his 22nd a few days ago. Ironically, my maternal great-grandfather owned and operated a bakery in Butler, Missouri.

I love that this baking business has started for several reasons. One is that I had stopped baking, because my life pre-pandemic had gotten very, very busy. This pandemic has forced me to slow down and resume my passion for baking! The second is that Dominic is learning both “life” and “work” skills. One of his favorite things to do when we go on a delivery is to hold my phone and help me “navigate” with Google maps. The third is that my ultimate goal for this business is for Dominic to have his own bakery (like my great-grandfather had), but employ only those with special needs. It’s a great (and realistic) goal to have, don’t you think?!?!?!

 

This post originally appeared on bountifulplate.

I am a stepmom to one and a mom to two. I have been a stay-at-home mom for over 24 years. Grew up in Maryland and have lived in Michigan since 2001 when my husband got a job here. My 16-year old son has multiple disabilities.

It’s 4 p.m. and you finally close the laptop as your child’s virtual school day ends. Or, maybe your child physically went to school today but had limited time at the playground. And it shows. They need action!

Physical activity helps a child stay regulated (process and adjust to their environment) and promotes the maturation of their nervous system. Due to the Coronavirus pandemic, it is even more important to make children’s physical wellbeing a priority to combat the potential negative effects on their physical, social, and psychological health. Physical activity in children is even associated with higher academic performance!

These top 10 afterschool activities are perfect for getting the wiggles out of your kids, no matter what materials or space you have!

1. Obstacle Course
Give your child a minimum of 3 to 4 steps. Get creative with what you have at home (both indoors and outdoors) when coming up with tasks at each “station”. A few ideas to start with: throw balls into a laundry basket, do 10 jumping jacks, jump in and out of a hoola-hoop, crawl under chairs. Try getting your child to complete as much of the course as independently as they can. Challenge them to remember each step in the sequence (and in the right order) to help develop their memory and other cognitive skills!

2. Simon Says
A classic! “Simon says do a handstand.” “Stand on 1 leg.” A simple game of Simon Says can help promote body awareness as your child engages in different movements. They’ll also have to use their auditory comprehension skills to follow the directions and listen for whether or not “Simon” said!

3. Ball Bounce
Bouncing on a large exercise ball against a wall can give your child just the amount of physical input their body needs. To add some cognitive demands, ask your child to sing their ABC’s while bounding, or go back and forth naming different animals for each letter of the alphabet without repeating.

4. Animal Walk Relay
Make a “path” around the house using tape, flags, or colorful dots. Have your child get from point A to point B by pretending to be the animal you name. Bear walk, bunny hop, crab walk, frog jumps – this one’s sure to work their muscle strength and coordination!

5. Go for a Ride
Kids can take a ride on their bike, scooter, skateboard, or whatever they choose! For an added language benefit, play “I Spy” while riding to help improve your child’s vocabulary by understanding and using descriptive words.

6. Towel Tug
Lay a towel on the floor and weigh it down with objects. Or, have a sibling sit on it! Have your child pull the towel across the room. Keep them motivated by asking them to make a prediction of how many times they think they can do this!

7. Scorpion Game
Parents—here’s a new sensory-motor game that also gives you time to interact with your kids! You pretend to be a scorpion, holding a pool noodle as your stinger and keeping your eyes closed. Your child is the squirrel that has to try and “rescue” stuffed animals from the ground by picking one up and running it back to the other side of the room. If your child gets “stung” and you tap them with the noodle, they must do an exercise you choose (jumping jacks, star jumps, or sit-ups, for example).

8. Dog Catcher
Make two bases across from each other, connected by a path of pillows. You are the dog catcher and your child is the puppy. He or she must rescue their stolen “bones” (balls) or animal friends (stuffed animals) by taking the pillow path to your base and back when you pretend to go to sleep. If your child wakes you up or accidentally steps on the floor, the dog catcher (you) have to try and tag the puppy!

9. Lava Floor
Pretend the floor is lava! You and your child can make a path in the living room to get from the couch to the door without touching the floor. Use pillows, bean bags, and other objects you find to help your child practice their balance, coordination, and creativity!

10. Jump Up!
A great way to give your child’s body some vestibular input (balance and awareness of their body’s position in space)? Jumping! Kids can jump on a trampoline or on a mattress you put on the floor.

Some children may have trouble with balance, coordination, strength, are constantly moving, or become easily distracted. If you have concerns in these areas of your child’s development, an evaluation by a physical therapist or occupational therapist can help. TherapyWorks is a company that provides these services (in addition to speech therapy, feeding therapy, and social work) via teletherapy. You will be connected with a therapist who specializes in your areas of concern and can provide more tips for at-home activities for your child!

 

Resources:
U.S. Centers for Disease Control. Considerations for schools.https://www.cdc.gov/coronavirus/2019-ncov/community/schools-childcare/schools.html

Sprang, Ginny & Silman, Miriam. (2013). Posttraumatic Stress Disorder in Parents and Youth After Health-Related Disasters. Disaster Medicine and Public Health Preparedness. 7. 10.1017/dmp.2013.22.

Chaddock-Heyman, L., Hillman, C. H., Cohen, N. J., & Kramer, A. F. (2014). III. The importance of physical activity and aerobic fitness for cognitive control and memory in children. Monographs of the Society for Research in Child Development, 79(4), 25-50. https://doi.org/10.1111/mono.12129

 

I'm a mom entrepreneur and Co-Founder of TherapyWorks, a pediatric therapy company that provides services via telehealth. I recognized the need to make high-quality pediatric therapy more convenient after one of my own children needed therapy and launched TherapyWorks with my Co-Founder, an experienced speech language-pathologist, with that in mind. 

Photo: © Brigitte Stanford—EyeEm/Getty Images

Hearing a doctor or psychologist diagnose your child with a serious diagnosis can be a gut punch for a parent or caregiver. You will need to face your own feelings about the diagnosis, learn about the condition, and take action on behalf of your child.

This article about autism is the first in a series called “Now What?” in which we provide helpful guidance to parents, caregivers, and any friend or family member seeking to support a family experiencing these challenges.

“Is Something Wrong with My Child?”

Maybe your daughter is a late talker who doesn’t allow others to hug her. Maybe your son talks up a storm about Thomas the Tank Engine and can only go to sleep when every engine from the show is lined up in a precise order on his bed. Maybe your child doesn’t make eye contact or reply in a conversational way when you speak to them.

The American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) recommends that parents who are concerned about their child’s development talk with their doctor. The AAP recommends screening all children for autism at the 18- and 24-month well-child visits.

The Initial Screening & Evaluation

Sometimes the initial screening process goes smoothly and results in a clear diagnosis. Julie and Kyle’s third and youngest child, Aldo, was only two when he was diagnosed with autism, and he qualified for early intervention, a program that offers developmental support to very young children. Julie described Aldo as sociable and charming at times, but he didn’t like to make eye contact and he didn’t seem very interested in other kids. She was concerned by his frequent meltdowns, which were caused by a flood of intense feelings, both physical and emotional. When she took him to be evaluated, the evaluators said his autism was as clear as day.

The evaluation process is not always that straightforward, though. For example, for children who have another major diagnosis, like deafness or cerebral palsy, indicators of autism are harder to recognize. In these cases, a parent might be told that their child’s behavior is due to a diagnosis that is already known.

That is what happened with Julie and Kyle’s second child, Tommy, who is legally blind. When he was in preschool, he was having such violent meltdowns that he had been asked to leave two schools. He didn’t like to be away from home, and it showed.

“His relationship with me and his dad and older sister was wonderful, but anybody else, he was like, ‘burn it all down.’” She knew in her gut something more than his low vision was going on, but every doctor they consulted insisted that vision was the only issue.

“When they’re little,” she says, “you’re trying to figure out, is this their personality or is something wrong?”

Insurance Issues Create Challenges

Sometimes factors like where you live and what kind of insurance you have make a difference as well. In Tennessee, where Julie and Kyle’s family lived at the time, state law does not require autism services to be covered by insurance.

“They were recommending applied behavior therapy for Aldo and we were looking into that,” she says. “After insurance we would be paying $800 a week. It was really shattering.”

So, like many families with autistic children, they researched states where, by law, autism services are covered at 100 percent, and they relocated to Pennsylvania.

After they moved, Tommy’s new school counselor referred him for evaluation, and he received an official diagnosis. It soon became clear that autism runs in both sides of the family. “They were talking about Tommy, but they were also aspects of my life,” Kyle says. He was diagnosed later that year. The family now includes two children and one adult with autism.

As the family settled into a new state, home, and school district, the boys started getting help.

About Autism Spectrum Disorder

Autism is a lifelong neurodevelopmental condition that affects a person’s ability to communicate and interact with others. Autism also affects a person’s ability to process changes and transitions in daily life and sensory information from their environment. Every autistic person is unique, but, generally speaking, autistic children may find it hard to make friends with typically developing peers and may become overwhelmed by sensory input or changes to routine. Some experience meltdowns that caregivers feel powerless to stop.

Autism is a spectrum disorder, which means autistic people experience it on a continuum of severity. Diagnosis is usually categorized as level one, two, or three.

  • Level 1: The person requires support for learning social skills, organizational and planning skills, and dealing with the expectations of society.
  • Level 2: The individual requires substantial support with verbal communication skills, understanding others’ body language, and managing changes to their environment or routines, which can cause them significant distress.
  • Level 3: The person requires very substantial support because of challenges related to verbal and nonverbal communication, as well as intensely repetitive behaviors and severe distress they experience during transitions.

ABA Therapy

Aldo, who is now four years old, attends a preschool that uses applied behavior analysis (ABA), a type of therapy that focuses on teaching specific behaviors and self-care skills. Aldo is working on language concepts, dressing himself, and regulating his emotions.

Kyle describes ABA as providing scripts to follow in a variety of situations, like when to say “I’m sorry for your loss,” versus “Everything will be OK.” As an adult who never received an autism diagnosis or support, Kyle had to learn this kind of thing on his own. “It’s basic pattern recognition for social situations,” he says, “but I’m still not very good at it.”

Julie says ABA works well as long as the teachers develop a rapport with their students first.

“ABA is only as good as the practitioner,” she says. “They were talking to Aldo like he’s a robot, giving him commands and expecting compliance. I told them, ‘You have to have an emotional connection with him. If you are attempting to change his behavior without an emotional connection, he won’t do it.’”

For Tommy, the challenges are a bit more nuanced. At seven, he is in school with a one-on-one aide who helps him work on learning how different social rules apply in different places, like the playground versus the classroom, and handling overwhelming sensory input, like noisy hallways.

Even with support, sometimes the frustrations of a world that is too loud, changeable, and demanding take their toll on the boys, leading to meltdowns.

Kyle says, “A meltdown is when pieces don’t fit, things don’t make sense, and they’re unable to reconcile the reality of the situation and deal with it. It is based on the sheer terror of losing contact with the reality you know to be safe and right and good.”

Other Supports & Therapies

Support for autistic individuals often means therapies that target their specific needs. In addition to ABA, which is considered the gold standard for autism support before age four, support may include:

  • Speech and language therapy offers support for anyone with difficulties that relate to talking, feeding, processing language, and understanding body language and social cues. The communication challenges that make up major features of autism mean that many autistic children receive speech therapy.

  • Occupational therapy helps people master fine motor tasks like handwriting, dressing, or feeding themselves, and challenges related to sensory processing challenges, which affect how intensely sensory input affects a person’s nervous system.

“This Is Really Hard”

Julie wants parents whose kids have just been diagnosed to know that there is a whole community that understands what you’re feeling.

“I would tell them, ‘you’re not crazy; this is really hard,’” she says. “I’ve had to change aspects of my personality to be a better mom. I’m not a naturally organized person, and I’ve had to dissolve and reinvent myself to become the kind of mom they needed me to be.”

Kyle agrees that the organizational demands of raising children who are autistic are a lot harder than they should be. “You have to be prepared for a nonstop litany of ‘go here first, do this next.’ And you may or may not get where you’re supposed to go.”

Julie says she has had to employ two opposite modes of communication as an advocate for her sons. “One is ‘I’m a complete emotional mess asking anyone for help,’ and the other one is this really hard-nosed, clear-sighted person going for what they need,” she says. “I’ve had to use both of them. I’ve had to cry on the phone to get help with paperwork, and I’ve had to hire a special education advocate because the school was jerking me around.”

Finding social support is essential. “Even though you feel alone, you’re not alone. Find online groups, especially local ones, that are supportive and loving and won’t shame you. Those communities are lifesavers.”

About the Author
Juliet B. Martinez is a freelance writer and editor with close to 20 years of experience writing on health, science, and parenting topics. A graduate of Northwestern University’s Medill School of Journalism, Juliet has published articles in Chicago Parent and Green Entrepreneur, among others. She lives in Pittsburgh with her husband, a drummer and university administrator; her deaf, autistic, K-pop-loving teenager; and her tween, who still likes to cuddle. Read more of Juliet’s writing at www.julietbmartinez.com.

Sources:

Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, “Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD) Diagnostic Criteria,” [n.d.]
Heather, “9 Things To Do After Your Child Receives An Autism Diagnosis,” 2019
Jewell, Tim, “What Are the Signs of Autism in Teenagers?” 2020
Kandola, Aaron, “Levels of Autism: Everything You Need to Know,” 2020
Lee, Andrew M.I., “Individuals with Disabilities Education Act (IDEA): What You Need to Know,” [n.d.]
Lindberg, Sara, “Is Autism Curable?” 2019
Morin, Amanda, “Early Intervention: What You Need to Know” [n.d.]
National Autistic Society, “Post-Diagnosis Support—A Guide for Parents and Carers,” [n.d.]
Psychology Today, “Applied Behavior Analysis,” [n.d.]

Learn More

Des Roches Rosa, Shannon, Byde Myers, Jennifer, Ditz, Liz, Willingham, Emily, and Greenburg, Carol, Thinking Person’s Guide to Autism, 2011
easterseals, Make the First Five Count (developmental screening)
Grandin, Temple, Thinking in Pictures, Expanded Edition: My Life with Autism, 2006

 

This post originally appeared on parents.britannica.com.
Britannica For Parents
Tinybeans Voices Contributor

We’re living in a time when it’s nearly impossible to distinguish fact from fiction. Parents need information they trust to help them make good decisions about raising their curious learners. Britannica for Parents provides safe and credible resources to empower all kids and parents and inspire curiosity for generations to come.

Confession: I am not an expert on all things parenting—yet I am proud in my imperfections. My world forever changed in 2005 when, at the age of 18, I gave birth of my firstborn son. Fast-forward to now and I’m currently raising five incredible children, the eldest having autism and epilepsy. On this journey, I have learned that although my intentions were pure, my actions were at times flawed.  

Parenting does not come with a playbook. No matter how many books you read, videos you watch and advice you receive, there will still be an underlying edge of uncertainty. Add multiple children. Add a disability. Add the second guessing: am I doing this right? How can I do this better? Are my children okay?

Experience is a very thorough teacher if you sit back at listen. For 10 years, it was just my older three children. Then 2015, I was expecting again, but this time I was carrying twins. The feelings of betrayal, guilt and doubt overwhelmed me. Can I do this?

I already spent three days a week in a waiting room: speech therapy, occupational therapy, neurology appointment, the list goes one—but I was not alone in these appointments. That’s when it hit me. 

Every appointment, his siblings accompanied him. Many of the seizures he experienced, his siblings were by his side. The feelings of helplessness and hopelessness were not just mine to bear. This journey was not just mine and his. His siblings shared in the pressures—the only difference is that they were still children, too.

I spent a great deal of time trying to “protect” my children from their brother’s disability. I thought I was doing them a favor by “taking care” of everything myself. Little did I know that I created a barrier between them and their brother fueling feelings of favoritism, isolation and resentment. These feelings were unknown to me but weighed heavily on them and began to surface in different ways.

I needed to change the way I parented my children, but that could not begin until I addressed the failures of the past.  I was pregnant, hormonal, guilty and hurting. I was trying to reach my younger children but scared to admit I was wrong. 

How do I tell these innocent super siblings that mommy noticed their pain? How does a parent press restart on the parenting journey? These are the three steps I took to bridge the gap in our family.

Apologies are healing.

As parents we feel the constant pressure of perfection. We fear being viewed as fallible to our children and our families. That must stop. I sat my children down one evening after their older brother went to sleep.

I looked them in the eyes and with a heavy heart said, “I am sorry. I know I spend a lot of time with your brother, but I want to hear from you. How do you feel?”

They responded with eyes looking at the floor, “Fine. I am okay, mom, I know he needs you.”

Insert a dagger in my heart.

My children were still considering their brother and his disability—his feelings—before their own.

I asked them to look me in my eye and said, “You need me. I am sorry if you do not feel I know you need me too.”

Tears formed in the eyes of these precious young souls.

“I miss you, mommy.”

We all cried a great deal that night. No, it was not the answer to every problem, but it was the beginning to a new wave. I spent that evening giving them permission to feel.

Feelings are important.

By opening the door to communication, I gave my children the freedom to feel. They knew that that there was no wrong way to feel regarding their brother. Yes, the time spent would never be equal, but the love from mom was the same. I was on their team regardless of how hard it was. 

They told me how isolated they felt. The expressed the burden they carried in weight of being the younger sibling but knowing they were on a higher level cognitively than their older brother. This was huge.

Education is empowering.

I opened the conversation to questions. I did not know what to expect, but their questions came back-to-back:

“What is autism? What is epilepsy? Why does he flap his arms? Will he die having a seizure?” 

The items I thought I was protecting them from were the same items they were trying to internalize. They had a million questions and I sat and answered every one the best way I could, ending our talk with, “If mommy does not know the answer, mommy will find the answer.”

Children in special needs family experience things that their peers never encounter. They mature faster because of the things they go though. If parents fail to connect and educate the siblings on the disability, they feel lost and unprepared. 

“What do we do when there is a seizure?”

They watched me all these years, but I never communicated the process. I never took the time to address their concerns and prepare them for the possibilities. Fail. We do not know something until we know something. 

Now, when someone questions why their brother is flapping his arms, they are equipped to respond: “My brother is stimming. Do you know what stimming is? Let me teach you.”

Looking back, I realized all the ways I could have parented them better, but I did not have time to wallow in guiltiness. My oldest child was not the only one with special needs. The siblings had special needs of their own. They required active attention. They needed me to put them on the family calendar. 

All the time I spent ensuring their older brother was okay, I missed that the siblings were not okay. I falsely assumed I was protecting them. I made a change to communicate even when it was uncomfortable.

Parenting is not a one size fits all. All children are different and if we desire to raise secure and strong adults, we must start with ourselves. Acknowledge that while our intentions are good at times our follow though is faulty. 

There is power in an apology. I learn daily, yet I make it a priority to address the concerns the siblings face. I am a stronger and wiser parent now. My children know that they matter and that our certainty is that they know they are not on this lifelong journey alone.

Jeniece is a fearless special needs mother of five fabulous children: Christian, Caleb, Jada, Rose and Raymond—all of whom rock her world and shake up her soul! She is the founder of Special Needs Siblings, a non-profit organization committed to supporting the siblings of disabled individuals.