We’ve all had days when the sight of our partner makes us want to run in the opposite direction. That’s part of being married, after all. But when are those feelings a red flag that something might be wrong? When are the things that might seem normal to you actually unresolved resentment in your relationship? An Instagram post on the subject by Erin Mitchell, MACP, and Stephen Mitchell, PhD, founders of Couples Counseling for Parents, recently grabbed our attention. So we chatted with the married couple, who share three kids, to flush out the six behaviors mentioned in their post. Here’s what they had to say.

1. Having a hard time assuming your partner’s “best.”

“Assuming the best in your partner gives you the space to ask the curious questions and help you navigate and not get stuck in places of resentment. It’s a way of interpreting interactions,” explains Stephen.

For example, your partner comes home crabby and irritable. If you automatically assume the worst, you might think, My partner just said something snarky to me; they always do that. When you assume their best, you might consider, Huh, I wonder if they got enough sleep last night? and ask invitational questions like, ‘Hey, that was snarky. Are you tired; are you okay?’”

2. “Minor” conflicts seem to escalate into “major” conflicts regularly.

It starts small with a menial chore or task—the shoes are everywhere in the house, dishes never seem to make it into the dishwasher, or laundry never gets put away.

These small things can represent resentment in relationships, especially if you aren’t getting the help you need from your partner, and often lead to a larger argument about the relationship. “‘I have to pick up the whole house. I don’t feel like we’re a team. I don’t feel supported. You do nothing. It can even escalate to ‘It’s been this way forever, and now I’m done,’” Stephen says.

Erin points out that escalating conflicts can also arise if one partner seemingly has more “me” time. In a healthy relationship, situations around time should be give-and-take, but a situation can escalate quickly if you have unresolved relationship resentment.

3. Your reflex when your partner is near is to feel tense or guarded.

How you and your partner deal with conflicts plays a role in how you feel when your partner is near, and, as Erin points out, there is a physical reaction aspect of feeling guarded. She describes it as a nervous system feeling: “If you’re not in a resolved, connective place, your partner’s presence may activate your discomfort, which, on a level, represents disconnection in a relationship.”

4. When you think of having a conversation with your partner, you decide it’s not worth it.

This situation boils down to whether or not you expect there to be conflict when trying to communicate with your partner. “A lot of the resentment comes when someone doesn’t feel acknowledged or validated or seen or understood,” Stephen says. “And they feel like they’ve been trying to communicate that to their partner, or their partner, once again, doesn’t get it. It’s that tension of, oh, I don’t want to get into it again.”

5. Arguing about the same thing over and over again and then over again.

If you and your partner continuously argue about the same issue, that’s a sign that communication is lacking, leading to unresolved resentment. As mentioned above, not being heard or validated is a big part of the equation.

6. You not only don’t feel the “spark” anymore, but you’re not sure you miss it.

No closeness in a relationship, whether mentally or physically, is a sign you don’t care to be around your partner, which may be tied to underlying tension or feelings of general dislike or disconnect.

What can you do about unresolved resentment in relationships?

According to the Mitchells, you have to be okay with emotions that might be uncomfortable for you, whether anger, sadness, fear, joy, etc. At that point, you have to understand why that emotion is so hurtful. Then, and only then, you can communicate with your partner gently and with vulnerability.

“Going back to the example of the shoes, if you acknowledge that yeah, it’s just shoes, but explain you’re feeling out of sorts (a bad day at work, kids talking back), and having an organized home is important [to you]. It’s really about you, not the shoes. Make it about yourself and not your partner—that’s communicating with vulnerability. You want your partner to get you, and you want to feel seen.”

Erin elaborates, “It isn’t the little things you feel sad or angry about, but the disconnect in the partnership.”

Related: Psychologist Reveals the 4 Signs of a Doomed Relationship

You’ve probably heard the phrase “communication is key,” but how often do you think about it? Whether we like it or not, how we communicate with others heavily impacts our lives. And as women in a still heavily patriarchal world, we face additional scrutiny for our language.

“In our society, women are taught from a very young age that our worth is based on external validation, acceptance, and belonging. Pair that with ever-present messages from a society that glorifies all things masculine and vilifies, minimizes, and infantilizes all things feminine, and you get an impossible scenario of being stuck between a rock and a hard place for women to operate ‘correctly,’” says holistic life and career coach and founder of Inclusive Leadership Collective Nikki Innocent.

Does that mean we should completely change the way we speak? Do we need to talk “more like men”? Not quite. But there’s something to be said about altering our language a bit. Not because men criticize it, but more to remind ourselves and one another that we are worthy of existing and taking up space as much as anyone else.

The following list of phrases women should stop using are not ways to continue to criticize gendered language. It is a reminder that we (as women and mothers) are much more deserving, accomplished,  interesting, and worthy than the world might sometimes tell us we are. We spoke with several experts to get their ideas on this complex issue and how we can ensure our voices are heard as loudly as anyone else’s.

Phrases Women Should Stop Saying

1. “I am sorry.”

How often have you apologized for things that were your fault and also not your fault? Or for things that had no one to blame? Or for simply existing? I know I’m guilty of this far too often, but experts agree we need to save this one for only when necessary.

“There are two times that women should say ‘I am sorry,'” says Eliza VanCort, transformation teacher and author of A Woman’s Guide to Claiming Space: Stand Tall. Raise Your Voice. Be Heard. The first is when they have done something wrong, and the second is when a task goes awry because they should have asked for help but didn’t. According to VanCort, apart from those two situations, apologizing isn’t helpful as it insinuates that you’re doing something wrong when you aren’t.

Innocent agrees. “Understand why you are saying it and give yourself permission to slowly reprogram yourself to what feels more aligned with how you want to engage with the world around you rather than the default most of us have of apologizing for needing anything or just existing,” she says.

Both Innocent and VanCort say shifting from apologetic to being appreciative can help with this. A simple “Thank you!” instead of “I’m sorry” is a solid start.

Related: 10 Times Your Daughter Shouldn’t Say ‘Sorry’

2. “I’m not sure” or “I don’t know.”

VanCort says many women have a difficult time saying no, as we are taught to be caretakers in our communication. This leads us to offer less confrontational statements. And when we offer such a soft or unsure response, it’s not surprising others may take advantage.

“Imagine a man says, ‘Are you OK with me giving the presentation even though you did most of the background work?’ Now assume there’s no logical reason for this request, and, in addition, the man has consistently taken credit for your work. Your answer can simply be ‘No,’” VanCort says.

She says to further your point, you can also directly explain why you’re not okay with it, such as the fact that you did the work and it’s important to you.

3. “Thank you so, so much!” when it isn’t warranted.

How often have you heard a girlfriend express extreme gratitude over her spouse doing something that is the bare minimum, like watching the kids for the night or doing the dishes?

Dr. Renee Solomon, a licensed clinical psychologist and co-owner of Forward Recovery, says many women are often overly grateful for things they don’t need to be.

“This is followed by a woman profusely thanking that person over and over. It is okay to thank someone for doing something, but a woman should not have to thank anyone profusely for fulfilling a basic expectation,” Solomon says.

Save the extreme gratitude for when it’s warranted, like someone saving your family from a burning building. Folding and putting the laundry away? Nah.

4. “Don’t worry about it.”

“Often when women are wronged and someone apologizes, we will follow their apology with ‘don’t worry about it,’” VanCort says. While acceptable if it was a genuine mistake, if someone is consistently unkind and apologizes without any real behavioral change, there’s no reason to tell them not to worry about it.

“Excusing it sets you up for it happening again,” she says. Instead, she suggests saying something like, “Thank you for your apology, and I hope this doesn’t happen again. It’s not OK.”

5. “… but what do you think?”

While getting others’ input can be good at times, other times we’re just undercutting ourselves. “(The phrase) ‘… but what do you think?’ takes away the idea that has been presented and makes it appear that the woman does not know if it is a good idea,” Solomon says. She recommends women make their statements and pause for a response rather than immediately second-guessing themselves, which can make us sound less self-assured.

VanCort offers similar phrases like “I’m no expert” or “This might be a bad idea… but.” “This is a classic example of a woman diminishing her opinion to avoid pushback. If you believe something is worth saying, don’t start undermining what you’re going to say. If you have an opinion, state it without apology,” she says.

6. “This has to be perfect.”

Many women struggle to make themselves and or their surroundings fit some ideal. A perfectly clean home. The perfect holiday memories. Going to great lengths to fit impossible standards of beauty.

“We don’t see the invisible energy drain that perfectionism creates,” Innocent says. She recommends saying something as simple as “Oops!” to combat this.

“From making stumbles as small as forgetting something from the grocery store to sending an email to the wrong person or without an attachment… All of them are now met with an ‘Oops, I’m human, and I know I tried my best!’” she says.

She reminds herself and others that mistakes benefit our future selves in some way and that accepting this also allows us to release control. Another phrase she offers: “I’m doing the best that I can with what I have, and I’m a human being.”

Related: The Stress of Parenting Turned Me into a Perfectionist—and It Almost Killed Me

7. “I’m just lucky to be included.”

How often do we hear men in meetings say something like this? The answer is almost never.

“So often when working with women stepping into leadership positions, we grapple with a limiting belief of ‘I’ll take whatever I can get because if I ask for what I need or say no, I’ll burn a bridge or seem ungrateful. That belief doesn’t come out of nowhere; it’s a message many of us receive overtly or subvertly when interacting with the world around us,” Innocent says.

Innocent works with women who struggle to get what they need by helping them shift the narrative to a place of strength, knowing, and trust. She advises reframing being “lucky” to being intentional and stating needs outright and what happens if those needs aren’t met. For example, if you require X to move forward with a project, say that if you don’t get that, you won’t move forward.

A final note:

There are certainly some other phrases women should stop saying (like “I should”), but these are a great starting point. Moreover, we must recognize why these phrases work against us (mainly patriarchy) and that we raise our kids to understand the complexities of this so we can continue to move away from it. It’s just as important to remind boys and men to make women and others feel as worthy as they are.

There used to be this thing called sleep that we would get at night before any number of tiny humans came into the picture. You probably vaguely remember it. It was nice. But small kids and a good night’s sleep rarely go hand-in-hand, which leaves many parents scrambling to find a solution for their nighttime woes. It’s one thing to have a baby who wakes in the wee hours—we’re repeatedly warned about that—but what about a toddler whose stalling leads to a two-hour bedtime routine, or school-aged kids bolting awake multiple times a night? A lot of parents are taking matters into their own hands, turning to melatonin for some bedtime help. So, does it work? And, more importantly, is melatonin safe for kids?

To learn more about the risks and benefits of melatonin use in children, we spoke to Dr. Sara Siddiqui, a pediatrician at Hassenfeld Children’s Hospital in New York.

What is melatonin and how does it help with sleep?

“Melatonin is a hormone that is naturally found in the body to assist with circadian sleep rhythm and falling asleep,” Siddiqui explains. When you purchase melatonin gummies, pills, or tablets, you’re getting a synthetic version of that hormone that delivers a similar result.

Essentially, melatonin supplements create a signal that bedtime is here—think of it like sending a memo to your brain that says it’s time to get some shut-eye. When you’re dealing with jet lag, for example, it can be really helpful in coaxing your body to fall asleep at a different time than it’s used to. However, Siddiqui points to research indicating that taking melatonin does not help people stay asleep or get better quality rest during the night, which means it won’t stop your four-year-old from bouncing out of bed at 4 a.m. ready to start their day.

Is melatonin bad for kids?

Melatonin can be appropriate for kids when it’s given in the correct dose and only on occasion. “As a pediatrician, I understand the issues with children and sleep,” Siddiqui says. “Some children over the age of 2 may need supplementation of melatonin to assist in falling asleep for a brief period of time.”

While taking melatonin regularly isn’t something that most doctors or sleep experts recommend for children (or adults, for that matter), there’s a time and place for it. “I do recommend melatonin for certain children who are having difficulty falling asleep for various reasons,” Siddiqui says. “Perhaps a stressful event, or a change in environment, a new sibling, or a change in behavior.” It’s also been shown to help kids with ADHD or autism spectrum disorder who have sleep disturbances. Siddiqui stresses that melatonin should be used under the supervision of a pediatrician or another doctor specializing in children’s health, adding that it should be given temporarily and in low doses.

a toddler sleeping for a story anwering 'is melatonin safe for kids'
iStock

It’s also important to remember that because melatonin is a supplement, not a prescription drug, it’s not regulated by the FDA the same way pediatric ibuprofen, acetaminophen, and other medications are. This means there is no regulatory oversight on the content of melatonin gummies or tablets, and parents can’t be sure that they’re buying a safe, high-quality product. A study published in the Journal of Clinical Sleep Medicine looking at 31 melatonin supplements found that 71% of the products had more than 10% variance from the amount of melatonin they claimed to contain—and a quarter of the products also contained unauthorized (and unlabelled) serotonin!

Basically, it’s a bit of a Wild West where melatonin is concerned, but if it’s used temporarily under the guidance of your pediatrician the risks should be low. The biggest issue is when it’s taken casually or on a regular basis.

How much melatonin is safe for kids?

Siddiqui recommends speaking to your child’s doctor for personalized advice before offering them melatonin. Generally speaking, the typical dosage for kids aged 2-5 would be 1-2mg. A school-aged child may be given slightly more—perhaps 1-3mg—whereas someone over the age of 13 could take anywhere from 1-5mg in a single dose. Most medical professionals will recommend a low dose to start with. Because melatonin supplements differ by brand and all children are different, individualized guidance from a pediatrician is ideal.

Are there melatonin side effects for kids?

Most kids won’t have side effects from taking melatonin supplements, but some will experience headaches, increased bedwetting, nightmares, dizziness, agitation, or grogginess. Luckily, these symptoms typically subside as soon as they stop taking the melatonin supplement. Some researchers have speculated that melatonin can affect puberty-related hormones in children (due to similar findings in studies on animals) but there is no firm evidence and no long-term clinical trials have been conducted to date.

Can children overdose on melatonin?

Unfortunately, melatonin overdoses can and do happen—especially because kids and seniors are more sensitive to these supplements. Fortunately, the risk to their health is fairly low. “While [melatonin] overdoses can lead to excessive sleepiness, headaches, nausea, or agitation, luckily they aren’t dangerous most of the time,” according to Harvard Medical School.

Still, given the lack of regulatory oversight and extensive long-term research, this doesn’t mean that over-the-counter melatonin is completely safe. “Many sleep problems can be better managed with a change in schedules, habits, or behaviors rather than taking melatonin,” the American Academy of Sleep Medicine (AASM) stressed in a recent health advisory.

If you do choose to give your kids melatonin, be sure to discuss it with your family doctor first and always stick to the recommended dosage for your child’s age and/or weight. Don’t cut melatonin gummies or tablets in half since this can lead to inconsistent dosing.

boy doesn't want to go to sleep for a story answering 'is melatonin safe for kids?'
iStock

Other ways to help kids sleep

We understand why exhausted moms and dads are reaching for melatonin, but if it’s late-night Googling that brought you to the supplement you’ve probably also seen the term “sleep hygiene” thrown around—and research indicates that good sleep hygiene is way more effective when it comes to improving your kiddo’s sleep.

“Sleep issues in children are quite common,” Siddiqui says. “The practice of sleep hygiene and good sleep habits is so important to develop from an early age or any time there seems to be a disruption in sleep regulation.”

So what is sleep hygiene? It’s forming the good habits that help your body pick up on those time-for-sleep signals and release its own melatonin, which it does mostly as a result of being in the dark. She recommends:

  • a quiet period with no screen time for at least one hour before bedtime
  • a sound sleep routine consisting of a bath and bedtime story
  • teaching self-soothing techniques to help kids fall asleep and fall back asleep if they wake in the night
  • a consistent bedtime and awake time in the morning (yes, even on the weekend—we’re sorry)

Siddiqui also notes that sleep patterns will vary by age, so always start by asking your doctor for guidance if you have concerns about your kid’s health or sleep habits. Good luck and good night!

We know you want what’s best for your budding scholar, but when it comes to your relationship with your child’s teacher, there’s a fine line between a healthy parent-teacher partnership and an overly demanding one. So how do you best keep the communication channels open without offending anyone? We asked teachers to tell us about the common passive-aggressive, condescending, or straight-up rude comments they’ve gotten from parents.

Here are some things to avoid saying during a parent-teacher chat so you don’t (even inadvertently) offend your most important academic ally:

1. “I need… [insert thing here]”
– Michael W., third-grade teacher, Los Angeles, CA

I need an independent study.” “I need my child to do his homework.” “I need my kid to focus better in class.” We know you need things. But so does your teacher! Stop telling your teacher what you need and think more about the teacher’s (and the class’s) needs.

Instead: Say: “Do you have any time to discuss independent study/homework demands/etc.?”

2. “My child never had this problem/did this thing/struggled in the past.”
-Michael W., third-grade teacher, Los Angeles, CA

The past is the past! When you complain your child has never struggled in the past, what your teacher hears is you think it’s somehow their fault.

Instead: Focus on the present and discuss your child’s current needs without comparing them to years past (unless you have pre-existing strategies to offer your teacher that might help).

3. “But he was fine in preschool.” or “He never did that in preschool.” 
-Marni N., kindergarten teacher, Los Angeles, CA

Kindergarten isn’t preschool. There are new rules, changing routines, and a schedule that allows for a little less play and a little more learning—so don’t be surprised if your kid flounders a bit! Telling your kindergarten teacher that your child “didn’t do that in preschool” comes across as a passive-aggressive way of saying it’s the teacher’s fault.

Instead: Focus on your child’s current needs without comparing them to how they were in years past. Often, behavioral issues or learning challenges don’t appear until children get further along in school.

4. (When discussing seeking help with extra support staff  such as psychologists, behavioral specialists, OT/PT): “So what expertise do they have that you don’t?”
– Zak R., kindergarten teacher, Philadelphia, PA.

This sort of comment is best unsaid. You know what expertise a psychologist, occupational or speech therapist has—so asking your teacher to list those credentials is just “incredibly insulting.”

5. “Where did you go to college?”
-Pete S., eighth-grade teacher, Los Angeles, CA

It’s natural to wonder about your kids’ teacher, but asking this question (especially in a public setting) makes your teacher feel like you’re questioning their intelligence.

Instead: Read up on your teacher’s qualifications at the back-to-school night (teachers usually give a handout with background information), or do your own research. No matter what, rest assured that your teacher knows what they’re doing.

6. Asking your teacher for the opinions of other teachers
-Michael W., third-grade teacher, Los Angeles

A close-knit staff doesn’t want to get into the nitty-gritty with parents. “We are all colleagues, and yes, most of us know each other’s strengths and weaknesses, but that doesn’t mean we want to share that.”

7. “I know you’re very busy, but…”
Michael W., third-grade teacher, Los Angeles

If you know they’re very busy, don’t ask unless it’s important.

8. “My child isn’t being challenged in math, reading, etc.
Michael W., third-grade teacher, Los Angeles

Many teachers have classes of 20 to 30 kids of varying abilities—while they try their best, they can’t always tend to the needs of particular children (especially in elementary schools where they teach ALL subjects).

Instead: Add extra at home or via extra-curricular activities/tutoring. “It’s not that we don’t care, we’re just really crunched for time. To prepare and implement 4-6 different levels is not reasonable.”

Related: 14 Questions Teachers Wish You Would Ask About Your Kid

a teacher who is stressed out by a parent teacher relationship
iStock

 

9. “I just don’t understand why my child is struggling in your class.”
-Anne V., second-grade teacher, Los Angeles, CA

This only makes teachers feel like you think they’re the reason your child is struggling.

Instead: Ask, “What do you think my child needs?” Then work with your teacher to help your child thrive.

10. “Do you have kids?” 
-Madison S., fourth-grade teacher, Georgetown, SC

“In a normal conversation, I wouldn’t mind being asked if I have kids,” says Madison, “but if I’m trying to talk discipline with a parent and they ask that, then I’m offended as if they think I don’t know what I’m talking about.”

Instead: Just don’t.

11. “I’m not telling you how to do your job, but…”
-Amanda J., fifth-grade teacher, Georgetown, SC

But you just did.

Instead: Let your teacher do her job, and only offer to help if you think she needs it.

12. “Teaching is a noble profession.”  
-Steve, fourth-grade teacher, Nassau County, New York.

“You’re saying the job sucks, and you make no money, and you get no respect from people,” he said.

Instead: Just say thanks.

13. ” I could never do what you do!”
-Melanie, high school teacher, Nassau County, NY

“That’s not really what they mean. They mean they’d never want to.”

Instead: Just say thanks.

14. “What did you want to do before you became a teacher?”
—Dan, high school teacher, Nassau County, NY

This suggests that being a teacher is a backup or that you think they should do something else.

Instead: Just don’t.

15. My child said you didn’t teach the topics covered on the test.”
-Joe, high school teacher, Nassau County, NY

Give your teacher some credit and assume that everything on any test was taught at some point.

Instead: Ask the teacher how your child can better prepare for the next test.

16. “By the time my son gets all his work done for his important core classes, he’s too tired to do the work for yours. I’m sure you understand.”
-Kathryn, high school teacher, Nassau County, NY

You just called that teacher’s class “unimportant.”

Instead: Work with your child on figuring out how to get all the work done.

17. Talking about your child’s “giftedness” in front of other parents.
-Pete S., eighth-grade teacher, Los Angeles

If parents have questions about supporting their “gifted” child, they need to talk about it privately. “’My child is doing calculus in middle school; how will you make this class challenging for him/her/them?’ is an annoying and isolating question for other families in a group setting, and it also communicates to the teacher that parents don’t think the teacher is up to the challenge of teaching that student,” says Pete.

Instead: Address your concerns in an e-mail.

18. Going to the principal (or social media) before talking to the teacher about an issue.
-Amanda J., fifth-grade teacher, Georgetown, SC

“There are plenty of times when simply letting me know about something is all it takes to handle it. Similarly, if/when parents post complaints on social media without communicating directly with the teacher,” says Amanda.

Instead: Talk to the teacher first.

Related: 16 Things Parents Don’t Need to Worry About (According to Teachers)

a parent teacher conversation in a hallway
iStock

Here are general phrases to avoid during a parent-teacher chat that can come off as critical, accusatory, or condescending:

  • I’m not sure if you’re aware, but...” This is a backward way of saying that you think your teacher is slacking—or of making you feel better about being the whistleblower. Instead, be direct and express your concerns about the issue straight up. (I.e., My child said so-and-so bullied him in class. Can you help me get to the bottom of this?”) 
  • I’m sure you’re just having a bad day, but…” This automatically makes someone feel like you’re about to insult them because it’s usually followed by a negative comment. 
  • “I’m not trying to be difficult, but…”  This opening may put the teacher on guard (or make her think you are being difficult.). Just say what you want to say directly.
  • Don’t take this the wrong way, but…” – Despite your warning, whatever you’re going to say will likely be taken the wrong way (or you wouldn’t preface it as such). So say it differently.

Here are examples of more direct and assertive phrases:

    • “I’m wondering if you could tell me how my child is doing.”
    • “I’d love to know how to support my child at home.”
    • “I’d like to schedule a meeting to discuss my child’s progress.”
    • “I’m happy to help in any way I can.”

It also has a dedicated marine biologist on staff

Picture this: You’ve just endured a long flight from the U.S. (about 11 hours from SFO) and a small plane takes you from Nadi Airport on a journey over lush, green mountains and some of the most gorgeous turquoise-blue ocean you’ve ever seen. Your family vacation to Jean-Michel Cousteau Resort is just beginning when you arrive at Savusavu Airport on Fiji’s second-largest island. The smiling staff members are there to welcome your family and transport you to the resort that will become your home away from home for the duration of your stay in Fiji.

Jean-Michel Cousteau Resort is an eco-luxury property with a focus on cultural immersion and environmental education but in our opinion, the star is their kids’ club program—Bula Club. We’ll get into the nitty gritty details below, but trust us, it’s the main reason families return year after year.

Marine education and activities are also a huge focus at the resort and that’s evidenced by the fact that they have a marine biologist on staff and a dive center on the property. You can even get scuba-certified when you arrive to take advantage of the diving program while you are there. Night snorkeling, kayaking, and days by the pool are all on the agenda.

What’s it like to stay at Jean-Michel Cousteau Resort?

Jean-Michel Cousteau Resort bure
Jean-Michel Cousteau Resort

The minute you arrive at Jean-Michel Cousteau Resort (JMCR), you are welcomed with music and a tropical beverage before you are whisked off to the bure you will call home for your stay. Here you’ll get your welcome foot massage as you take in the sounds of the waves crashing offshore in Savusavu Bay.

Jean-Michel Cousteau Resort bure

Bures are wood-and-straw huts and there 25 to choose from with many different layouts available for families. You’ll find larger split-level bures where parents have a king bed and there is a section for the kids to sleep as well. A 2-bedroom layout includes a separate bedroom with attached bathroom that’s perfect when traveling with older kids.

No matter what layout you choose, they come with an outdoor deck and hammock that’s perfect for relaxing while the kids are at the Bula Club. You’ll love the indoor-outdoor feel of the bures where you can enjoy the sounds of the waves as you drift off to sleep.

What’s included with your stay at Jean-Michel Cousteau Resort?

Jean-Michel Cousteau is an all-inclusive resort and your rate includes meals, non-alcoholic beverages, transfers from Savusava Airport, daily Bula Club for the kids, and tons of on-site activities like yoga, snorkeling, eco-walks, marine biologist talks, and so much more. Perhaps the best perk is the laundry service that will get your washed and folded clothes back to you in 24 hours. It’s a great way to keep your luggage to a minimum.

What is the kids club like at Jean-Michel Cousteau Resort?

Just wait to be blown away. The Bula Club at JMCR offers care for kids from 2 months old up to age 12. There is a dedicated Bula Club just a short walk from the front desk where you’ll find water play areas, a pool with a mini water slide, sports courts, a kitchen and outdoor dining area, a playground, a zipline, a trampoline, and a hut where children can nap. It’s pretty much a kid paradise and we can understand why the kids love going here!

Care for babies and toddlers: For the littlest visitors ages 0-5, a dedicated nanny is assigned to each child for the duration of their stay. This nanny is available to provide care for the child from 8:30 a.m. -6 p.m. daily, after which one nanny is assigned per bure until 9 p.m. The nanny will stop by the breakfast table to make arrangements for the child for the day and find out what the family’s preferences are for napping, dining, and activities.

Jean-Michel Cousteau Resort dance performance

Care for kids ages 6-12: Kids in this age group are assigned a buddy during their stay. Buddy groups can have up to five kids and they have activities at the Bula Club throughout the day including games, water play, cooking classes, gardening, and so much more. They can participate in a Junior Chef Program where they visit the property’s organic garden, harvest produce, and assist kitchen staff in preparing lunch or dinner.

Kids can also participate in the resort’s amazing School Under the Sea Program. A daily schedule of activities centers around the day’s marine theme such as coral planting and sea creatures. Activities for the day can range from snorkeling, educational activities, a rainforest and waterfall tour, a local school visit, crafts, and learning about aspects of Fijian culture. Kids who complete the program get a “graduation” ceremony and a t-shirt to take home with them.

The Nannies/Mannies & Buddies: During our time at the property, we could really see the bond that formed between the nannies/buddies and their charges. Families told us that they returned to the resort year after year and their child would request the same buddy each time. There were even a few tears shed by kids when leaving the resort and having to say goodbye to their buddies. It really is a magical program with very caring people on staff who have worked at the resort for many years.

What activities are available at Jean-Michel Cousteau Resort?

Jean-Michel Cousteau Resort basket making

You can stay as busy or as relaxed as you’d like at JMCR. Every evening you’ll receive an agenda for the next day’s activities that could be anything from beachside yoga to night snorkeling. We recommend booking an afternoon at the spa and getting the Koko Rapture massage where you are massaged with fermented cacao paste and wrapped in banana leaves. It’s just as heavenly as it sounds!

Fijian Culture: There are many opportunities to learn about Fijian culture throughout your stay. The resort offers weekly village visits where you can meet local Fijians, purchase crafts, participate in the cava ceremony, and learn about their traditions. On-property activities during our stay include basket making, a Fijian lovo meal, and a cava ceremony amoung others.

Jean-Michel Cousteau Resort marine biologist with kids
Jean-Michel Cousteau Resort

Marine Activities: Savusavu Bay offers an underwater world that is waiting for you to explore when you visit Jean-Michel Cousteau Resort. On the day we arrived, we enjoyed lunch and then immediately changed into swimsuits to head out on the afternoon’s snorkeling excursion, just a 10-minute boat ride away. The resort’s marine biologist accompanied us in the water and used a writing board to tell us the names of fish and creatures we spotted.

Scuba diving is available on-property for an additional fee and you can even get scuba-certified if needed. Other water activities included kayaking, sailing, paddleboarding, and our favorite—night snorkeling. We even got to see some bioluminescent creatures when we turned off our underwater flashlights!

Throughout our stay, the marine biologist presented talks about the coral reefs, sharks, and fish that make up the Fijian waters. She took us on a walk to the mangroves at the end of the property to talk about their importance and showed us how the property is actively replanting the mangroves (this is a favorite activity of the children).

Getting to Fiji

Fiji Airways flies direct from LAX (10.5 hours) and SFO (11 hours) to Nadi Airport. From there you board a much smaller plane for the hour-long flight to Savusavu Airport where you are greeted by friendly JMCR staff who will transport you to the property. The only real tricky part of this journey is navigating from the international terminal to the domestic terminal at Nadi Airport but the resort has someone there to meet you and walk you over (and the airport is quite small). If you have a lengthy layover at Nadi Airport on your way home, it is worth it to pay to get into the Fiji Airways lounge as it had lots of seating and offered a nice buffet and bar selection.

Final Thoughts

@k8loweth

Jean-Michel Cousteau Resort in Fiji. A magical place! #jeanmichelcousteau #fiji #travel #travelbucketlist #traveltiktok

♬ September (Dreamy Version) – JU$t

One of the most impressive things about our visit to Jean-Michel Cousteau Resort was how long the staff members had been working there—some of them over two decades! We really felt like we were joining their community when we visited and we heard many stories about how the property supported their staff members through difficult times, truly valuing them as people and not just employees. It was clear that the property placed a strong focus on supporting not only the staff but also the local community, which is rare for resort properties like this.

We could see why people rave about what a magical place Jean-Michel Cousteau Resort is, and why they return year after year.

Jean-Michel Cousteau Resort
Savusavu, Fiji
Online: fijiresort.com

Editor’s note: This trip was paid for by Jean-Michel Cousteau Resort but all the opinions belong to the writer. 

It’s no secret Trader Joe’s has a cult following

From heat-and-eat meals and fun florals to unique products you can’t find anywhere else, there’s so much to try out when you visit your neighborhood Trader Joe’s. Luckily, the grocer just released the results of its 15th annual Trader Joe’s Customer Choice Awards, which highlights fan faves. Want to know what other products are consistent winners? You can check them out in the Trader Joe’s Best Product Hall of Fame.

Favorite Overall: Chili & Lime Flavored Rolled Corn Tortilla Chips

chili and lime tortilla rolled chips are one of the best Trader Joe's products, according to customers.

Made from stone-ground corn masa that's rolled and fried to crispy perfection, then sprinkled with zesty hot chili and lime flavoring, these snackable rolls took the top prize again this year!  

Honorable Mentions

  • Steamed Chicken Soup Dumplings
  • Kimbap
  • Steamed Pork & Ginger Soup Dumplings
  • Butternut Squash Mac & Cheese

Related: The Best Trader Joe’s Food for Your Air Fryer

Favorite Beverage: Spiced Cider (seasonal)

Trader Joe's Spiced Cider
Trader Joe's

This winning beverage is only around at the holidays and you'll see folks loading up their carts when they come out. We prefer it warmed on the stove as it makes your house smell like the holidays. 

Runners-Up

  • French Market Sparkling Lemonade
  • Triple Ginger Brew (seasonal)
  • 100% Tangerine Juice
  • Non-Dairy Brown Sugar Flavored Oat Creamer

Favorite Cheese: Goat Cheese

Trader Joe's
Trader Joe's

Goat cheese is the GOAT for 2023 and we can totally understand why. It's great as an addition to a dip, spread on a sandwich, or crumbled over a salad. 

Runners-Up

  • Syrah Soaked Toscano Cheese Spread & Dip (limited)
  • Burrata
  • Toscano Cheese with Black Pepper
  • English Farmhouse Cheddar with Caramelized Onions

Related: 28 of the Healthiest Things You Can Buy at Trader Joe’s

#1 Lunch & Dinner: Butter Chicken with Basmati Rice

Trader Joe's butter chicken
Trader Joe's

Whole chicken chunks, creamy curry with tomatoes, paired perfectly with long-grain Basmati rice—what's not to love? 

Runners-Up

  • Chicken Tikka Masala
  • Steamed Pork & Ginger Soup Dumplings
  • Vegetable Fried Rice
  • Steamed Chicken Soup Dumplings

Favorite Sweet/Dessert: Sublime Ice Cream Sandwiches

Trader Joe's sublime ice cream sandwiches
Trader Joe's

These are definitely the ice cream sandwiches that you hide in the back of the freezer and eat when the kids go to bed. 

Runners-Up

  • Mint Chip Ice Cream
  • Hold the Cone! Chocolate Chip
  • Hold the Cone! Chocolate
  • Almond Kringle (seasonal)

You can check out the rest of the winners at traderjoes.com.

—Additional reporting by Karly Wood 

Disciplining kids of all ages can be tricky. We’ve all been in the heat of the moment when frustrations are high, and the default impulse to yell at or shame a misbehaving child is difficult to resist. According to experts, these tactics are minimally effective in the short term and entirely ineffective in the long term. “Children aren’t misbehaving because they are bad,” says Carole Kramer Arsenault, CEO of Boston Baby Nurse & Nanny. “They are trying to learn, and how we respond will have a huge impact on their development.”

Instead of losing your cool, engaging in positive discipline practices can help to more effectively manage unwanted or inappropriate behavior and allow little ones to genuinely learn and understand lessons about the consequences of their behavior. We consulted parenting experts for practical advice to help kids and parents weather the storms of tantrums, misbehaving, and acting out—scroll down to see 10 simple and effective disciplinary phrases to try the next time you need to put your foot down.

1. “Let’s talk about it calmly.” Defusing and de-escalating a tense situation is often the first order of business when disciplining a child. “Parents and kids are stressed like never before,” says Kramer Arsenault. “When you think back to how parents have traditionally responded to [their kids’] big emotions, it was often to react with similarly big emotions. Instead, our mindset about disciplining children needs to shift.” As an author, registered nurse, certified parenting coach, and mother of three, Kramer Arsenault said that rather than disciplining as punishment, parents should use these as teachable moments, starting from a calm place.

2. “Stop. Keep your hands to yourself.” In a circumstance where a child’s behavior may be hurting others, such as biting or hitting, Kramer Arsenault said it’s essential for parents to provide clarity in their directions to ensure parent and child are on the same page. “Instead of saying ‘You know you should keep your hands to yourself, right?’ it’s better to say it as a statement rather than ask a question.” Be firm and direct.

3. “No means no.” Being kind but firm is important to establish boundaries for a child. According to Dr. Stephen Bavolek, author of Nurturing Parenting Programs, setting boundaries and expectations for children helps build important life skills, including patience, problem solving, responsibility, and self-discipline. “The purpose of family rules is for parents and children to establish consistent guidelines that will help everyone know what is and isn’t expected of them,” said Bavolek.

dad using positive discipline on his daughter
iStock

4. “Try to do better.” Acknowledging that there is an opportunity to do better is important for a child’s growth. Maureen Healey, child development expert and author of “The Emotionally Healthy Child,” says, “When we’re upset, we may scream or slam doors, but moving from reactivity to responsiveness is the path to positive emotional health.” Encouraging children to catch themselves and make different, better choices is an important life lesson.

5. “Consider the consequences.” Trying to reason with an upset child can seem like a Sisyphean task, but guiding a child to understand the consequences of her actions can have a lasting impact. “Having clear expectations is very important,” says Kramer Arsenault. “But sharing the consequences of actions is just as important, too.”

6. “Let’s take some deep breaths together.” Tense situations between parent and child sometimes warrant time outs for both parties to allow the heated moment to pass. According to the American Academy of Pediatrics, effective discipline to raise healthy children does not include any form of corporal punishment. Researchers have linked corporal punishment to an increased risk of negative behavioral, cognitive, psychosocial, and emotional outcomes for children. 

7. “Can I find a special toy for you?” If a child is fighting over a toy with another child, redirecting their attention and refocusing on something else can alleviate the tension. Children sometimes misbehave because they are hungry, bored, or don’t know any better. Experts said encouraging something new or different to focus on is a useful reframing and disciplining tactic.

 

mom hugging son
iStock

8. “It’s OK to be upset.”  Permitting children to experience their feelings is important to developing their sense of self and security. “Kids have a lot of emotions and outbursts, and sometimes they don’t understand why,” says Kramer Arsenault. “Just explaining and teaching them that it’s OK to feel upset is an important lesson.”

9. “Can you choose a better word to use?” Talking back or potty talk can be alarming. For example, parents may experience their potty-training kid suddenly expressing themselves with colorful (and inappropriate) language like “poopy-head.” Fortunately, the American Academy of Pediatrics assures that this is a normal developmental stage, and parents should avoid overreacting or making light of unwanted language. Instead, encourage problem solving and finding better, more appropriate language.

10. Sometimes, silence is golden. While there are serious misbehaviors that should never be ignored—including aggression or anything that puts a child or others in harm’s way—selectively ignoring relatively minor, negative attention-seeking actions, such as whining, temper tantrums, and talking back, may help to curtail those problematic behaviors in children. According to research, positive reinforcement through praise and support, with consistency and clarity, results in greater emotional stability and health of children.

When words fail, Boston Baby Nurse & Nanny’s Carole Kramer Arsenault suggested three simple reminders: 

  1. Parents need to better educate themselves to appropriate, positive disciplining.
  2. Parents can build trust with their children through consistency and clarity.
  3. Lastly, and most importantly, parents should model the behavior they want from their children.

The expansive pool and helpful concierge were property highlights

We recently traveled down to Aruba to visit the new Embassy Suites by Hilton Aruba Resort and were immediately impressed by its welcoming hospitality, spacious rooms, and sprawling, beautiful pool. The sun in November didn’t disappoint either.

Embassy Suites by Hilton Aruba Resort opened in February 2023, and its location on J.E. Irausquin Blvd makes for a central location to everything the island has to offer. The property finds itself just south of the main strip in Noord, and at the top of Eagle Beach, which means you’re off the main stretch just enough to enjoy some proper R&R.

Embassy Suites Aruba

Embassy Suites by Hilton Aruba Resort has everything you need to make for a fun, relaxing, and delicious on-site-only vacation. The free-of-charge breakfast, which includes a continental and hot selection, fuels you up for a full day of adventure. For lunch, there’s drink and food service provided poolside or you can pop out of the water to enjoy a seated meal at the Splash Pool Bar. The food was good all around at the property—and we especially enjoyed the ceviche and fish tacos at Splash Pool Bar.

Embassy Suites Aruba

For happy hour, the property kindly provides two free drinks daily to all guests. If you’re there for 5 days, yes, you’ll receive 10 drinks per guest for free. The adults can enjoy a glass of wine or beer, and those under 18 can happily sip on juice or soda. At happy hour, Embassy Suites by Hilton Aruba Resort also provides its guests with some chips and crudité type snacks to nibble, which makes for a nice communal moment with other guests.

Speaking of other guests, several of the other families we met had been returning to Aruba as their #1 island of choice in the Caribbean for 10+ years. All of these Aruban regulars said they were happy with their choice to try the new Embassy Suites and considered it a great alternative to more expensive properties like Marriott’s Aruba Surf Club.

It’s worth noting that the beach at Embassy Suites is small, and it’s really the pool that’s the main attraction. There’s a trafficked street between the hotel and the beach, but the beach is accessible with the underground walking tunnel built by Embassy Suites to allow its guests to get from room to sand safely. The tunnel is a huge win for those traveling with strollers or wheelchairs.

Embassy Suites Aruba Eagle beach

If you want to spend your vacation on the beach, rest assured the famed Eagle Beach is only a 5-minute car ride from the property. Eagle Beach is often written up as one of the best beaches in the Caribbean, and we are confirming it’s worth taking the $15 roundtrip taxi fare from Embassy Suites to enjoy it.

The concierge at Embassy Suites was also a highlight. They helped us book dinner reservations off-property, organize cab rides, and most notably, a ½-day island tour, which was a trip highlight. On the island tour, our favorite stops were visiting an Ostrich Farm and enjoying art murals. On our ½-day tour, we enjoyed observing a landscape in Aruba that’s much different than other Caribbean islands outside of “the ABCs”. It’s more desert than tropical, with sprawling fields of cacti.

We understand why families return to Aruba year after year for sun, hospitality, and good times. We expect Embassy Suites by Hilton Aruba Resort to become a mainstay for traveling families. For price, service, location, and a beautiful pool, it’s a slam dunk in Aruba for families, especially those traveling from anywhere on the East Coast.

Make sure to capture all the vacation fun—and share them with your family and friends near and far—with the Tinybeans app. The secure platform puts parents in total control of who sees and interacts with photos and videos of their kids.

Editor’s note: This trip was paid for by Embassy Suites by Hilton Aruba Resort but all opinions belong to the writer.

Ride the rails, set sail for adventure, take in the big city, and so much more

We know that families are eager to get out there and see the world—and 2024 is going to be the year that they do it in a major way. We expect to see lots of families taking those big trips with both domestic and international destinations on the agenda for 2024. Airfare prices continue to remain high but there are more and more ways to find cheaper flights including a bunch of lower-cost airlines that have added US routes this past year. Road trips aren’t going away either as families pretty much have these down by now. Where will 2024 take you?

Low-Cost Airlines Can Get You Where You Need to Go for Less

istock

Chances are you are familiar with low-cost domestic airlines like Southwest, Frontier, and Spirit but did you know that there are low-cost airlines that will take you to Europe, Tahiti, Japan, and loads of other spots beyond the U.S.? Airlines like French bee, PLAY, Norse, and ZIPAIR have been adding routes from the U.S. in recent years and they are a great option for families looking to spend less on airfare.

We've flown French bee to Paris and Tahiti with kids and found it to be very comparable to other carriers like American Airlines and United. Just make sure you know what is included in your fare and what will incur an additional cost (like checked baggage, seat selection, and meals) before you book with these airlines so there are no surprises. 

Credit Card Points Offer a Way to Hack the System

Not everyone is interested in playing the credit card points game but those who know how to work the system often share that they can get some pretty great deals using signup bonuses. Websites like The Points Guy and NerdWallet are great places to start learning about what credit cards work best for travel and what deals are on the horizon. If you time your credit card sign-up right, many programs will gift you enough miles for free tickets. Plus, these travel cards often offer perks like free Global Entry or TSA PreCheck which are key in making your travel experience the best it can be. 

Families Want to Ride the Rails

Wendy Altschuler

According to Pinterest, 2024 brings slow travel to the forefront. After the busyness of 2023 with everyone getting back into travel in a big way, 2024 will have families slowing it down and looking for more mellow ways to travel. We predict that this will lead to more families will riding the rails for their next vacation. Nobody has to drive, your sleeping quarters are included, and you get to see some of the most gorgeous areas of the country. Bonus: it's super eco-friendly. From trains that take you to five national parks, to those that take you from New England to Florida, there's so much exploring to do. 

All-Inclusives Are Worth the Money

Club Med

Once thought of as a honeymoon-only extravagance, families are turning toward all-inclusive properties for vacations, especially when traveling with grandparents. Nobody has to cook, you know what you're going to spend in advance and kids will love getting to order mocktails from the swim-up bar. Some of our favorite spots: Club Med Miches Playa Esmeralda in the Dominican Republic, Villa la Valencia Beach Resort & Spa in Los Cabos, and Margarita Beach Resort Ambergris Cay in Belize. 

Cruising Is Back in a Major Way

Cruising has seen a major uptick in the past year and we are looking forward to checking out new ships like Royal Caribbean's new Icon of the Seas in 2024. Set sail for Alaska to catch the salmon run or book your vacation on the Disney Wish for a trip that's full of character breakfasts and kid activities. 

Those looking to cruise on a smaller scale should look to adventure cruise companies like UnCruise and Adventure Canada where you can expect small ships, small crews, and only a few hundred passengers. Bonus: Families will find that expedition cruising offers a level of personalization that you can't get on other cruises. 

Back to the Big City

Kate Loweth

The last few years have seen road trips and national parks vacations getting their time in the spotlight. According to Expedia, cultural capitals like Edinburgh, Lisbon, Tokyo, Dublin, and Sydney are going to see a lot more travel focus for 2023. We can get on board for that! 

Spend Some Time in a National Park

family hiking in a national park
istock

With over 400 national parks in the United States, chances are there are quite a few nearby that you have yet to explore. According to Airbnb, national parks travel will be a huge focus for 2024 and we can understand why. National park trips are particularly fun for families as they give kids (and parents!) a little history lesson and a big dose of fresh air at the same time. Check out these national parks that are particularly kid-friendly from California all the way to Maine. While you are at it, check this list to see what days are free at the national parks for 2024

Road Trips (Still) Reign Supreme

The past few years really brought back our love of the road trip. If you are itching to find a new destination for 2024, check out this list of our favorite road trips in the U.S. and find unique Airbnb rentals you can reserve along the way. Before you head out, peruse this list of road trip hacks to get your crew prepared for the long journey, and download some of our favorite podcasts for kids so you don't have to fight over the radio station. 

Head to the Trees

Airbnb

Whether it's the need to get as far away from civilization as possible or a Swiss Family Robinson obsession, families are taking to the trees and booking a night or two in a treehouse. There are loads of treehouses you can rent across the country with a ton of options, especially in California. There's even a brand-new treehouse resort near the Smoky Mountains that just opened in 2023. 

More Travel with the Grandparents

We expect to see a continuation of the multi-generational travel trend in 2024 with families looking to get out and travel with grandparents. Whether you send the kids off on their "gramping" adventure without you or are looking for somewhere that three generations can enjoy, there are plenty of options out there. 

Guided, Small-Group Trips

Exodus Travels

We want to go big with our travel plans but the actual planning of the trip is most definitely not part of the fun. Leave the planning and execution of your trip up to experts like Exodus Travels. You can book a private trip for your family, or join in a small group with other families that have similarly-aged kids to make it even more fun. Whether you go self-guided or have an expert there to show you the way, this type of travel is definitely the way to go for families. 

Another great option for a customized travel experience is Costa Rica Escapes, a company that specializes in creating family adventures based on the needs of your family. Definitely something you'll want to explore in 2024. 

Off-the-Grid Adventures

Many of us have developed our love of the great outdoors these past few years and we'll be looking for off-the-grid adventures for our 2024 trips. Think about a kayak trip in Yellowstone or a ranch vacation complete with a hot spring pool in Idaho. There are tons of awesome options out there with no WiFi in range. 

Ride Off into the Sunset in an RV

Kate Loweth

While most of us never considered RV travel as a fun option for a family, it has exponentially increased in popularity in recent years and we expect this trend to continue into 2024. If you are a total RV newbie, we suggest leaving the planning to the experts when you book your first RV trip. Think you can handle it on your own? Rent an RV, grab yourself a WiFi hotspot, and head out on the road to give road schooling a try. You can even try out the rad stylings of a camper van

Cozy Cabins to Get Away from It All

There's something so restorative about a weekend in the woods. Cabin rentals have become super popular and we don't expect that to change in 2024. They offer families time together, many times without WiFi, and you can even bring your dog. 

Make It a Micro-cation

If time and money are tight (hello, inflation), consider a micro-cation for your next family trip. These four-day-or-less trips allow you to see someplace new and get a break from everyday life. It's a good way to get the kids used to traveling without having to pack a ton of gear for everyone. Surprise the kids with a last-minute trip and see a new part of the country.

Take the Family Glamping

Mendocino Grove

Glamping gives you the best of both worlds—the smell of a campfire in your hair and an actual bed to sleep on. You won't have to schlep all of your camping gear with you, everyone gets a better night's sleep, and you still get time out in the woods away from WiFi and civilization. Check out some of our favorite spots for glamping including loads of options in California.

Make the best of shorter days when the time change arrives

Pre-kid, you never really thought about Daylight Saving Time (what’s an hour here or there?). But kids can make this seasonal change a challenge. With the end of Daylight Saving coming up soon (Sunday, November 5), falling back means it’s super dark, super early. Before you set your clocks back an hour, read on for some tips and tricks for keeping that precious, tenuous sleep/wake routine in place.

Related: The Dos and Don’ts of Baby Sleep (So Everyone Gets More Rest)

Bit by bit. You can try moving their bedtime back for a few days leading to the time change. This will help set your kids’ little clocks before the big day so it won’t be a total shock. Consider arming them with a cute (and practical) alarm clock to help make the transition a bit easier. Care.com recommends 15 minutes for babies, 20 minutes for toddlers ages 1 and over, and 30 minutes for school-aged kids.

Be consistent. If sleep time comes later, that means waking up time will, too. If you’re letting time creep up a few days before, do the same with wake-up time, breakfast, lunch, dinner, etc. Their entire day from top to bottom should feel the same, even if you’re adjusting and fudging with timing. They shouldn’t even notice a change, especially if they’re too young to tell time.

Use light and dark to your advantage. Since light and darkness influence our kids’ internal clocks, give them plenty of outdoor time during the day so it’s a bit easier to stay up later at night. Once it’s time to start winding down for that later bedtime, make sure their room is nice and dark.

Related: 10 Secrets to Getting Your Kids to Nap Longer

Eat Later It can be tricky when your family is used to their routine, but if you can bump dinner a bit later each night, it will help your kids’ internal clocks. Be sure to offer toddlers their afternoon snack a little later, too, and adjust your baby’s feeding schedule if possible.

Ignore it. Not the best strategy for some, but if you keep chugging along, so will they. Just switch everything on the day of, and move on. Kids are resilient. But try to keep their routine (mostly) intact.

Related: 14 Games to Play Before Bed That Guarantee a Trip to Dreamland

Be realistic. Your child may not even notice a slight change or they may go bonkers. But it’s important to remember to listen to them, understand why they’re upset, and work from there. Children are all so different—who knows how they’ll each react or even how one will react from year to year!

Be sympathetic. Remember to put yourself in your kids’ shoes and stay calm if they’re a hot mess for a few days. By staying calm, you’ll help kids adjust to fall daylight savings in no time.

When your kids have adjusted to the time change, make sure to capture all their cutest moments—and share them with your family and friends near and far—with the Tinybeans app. The secure platform puts parents in total control of who sees and interacts with photos and videos of their kids.