ML Interest Tag: wave

Dear Husband: I Need More Help from You

By Celeste Erlach

Dear Husband,
I. need. more. help.

Last night was hard for you. I asked you to watch the baby so I could go to bed early. The baby was crying. Wailing, really. I could hear him from upstairs, and my stomach knotted from the sound, wondering if I should come down there and relieve you or just shut the door so I could get some desperately needed sleep. I chose the latter.

You came into the room 20 minutes later, with the baby still frantically crying. You placed the baby in the bassinet and gently pushed it just a few inches closer to my side of the bed, a clear gesture that you were done watching him.

I wanted to scream at you. I wanted to launch an epic fight that very moment. I had been watching the baby and the toddler all damn day. I was going to be waking up with the baby to feed him all damn night. The least you can do is hold him for a couple of hours in the evening so I can attempt to sleep.

Just a few hours of precious sleep. Is that too much to ask?

I know we both watched our parents fulfill the typical mother-father roles growing up. Both our mothers were the primary caretakers and our fathers were relatively hands-off. They were excellent dads, but they weren’t expected to spend a significant amount of time changing diapers, feeding, caring, and tending to the kids. Our mothers were the superwomen who maintained the family dynamics. Cooking, cleaning, and raising the children. Any help from dad was welcome but unexpected.

I see us falling into these family dynamics more and more each day. My responsibility to feed the family, keep the house clean, and take care of the kids is assumed, even as I return to work. I blame myself for most of it, too. I have set the precedent that I can do it. And in truth, I want to. No offense, but I’m not sure I want to know what a week’s worth of dinner would look like with you in charge.

I also see my friends and other moms doing it all, and doing it well. I know you see it, too. If they can manage it, and if our mothers did it so well for us, why can’t I?

I don’t know.

Maybe our friends are playing the part in public and secretly struggling. Maybe our moms suffered in silence for years and now, 30 years later, they simply don’t remember how hard it really was. Or maybe, and this is something I berate myself over every single day, I’m just not as qualified for the job as everyone else. And as much as I cringe just thinking it, I’m going to say it: I need more help.

Part of me feels like a failure for even asking. I mean, you do help. You are an amazing father, and you do a great job with the kids. And besides, this should come easy to me, right? Motherly instincts, no?

But I’m human and running on five hours of sleep and tired as hell. I need you.

In the morning, I need you to get our toddler ready so I can care for the baby and make everyone’s lunches and drink a cup of coffee. And no, getting the toddler ready does not mean plopping him in front of the TV. It means making sure he goes potty, giving him some breakfast, seeing if he wants water, and packing his bag for school.

At night, I need an hour to decompress in bed, knowing our toddler is asleep in his room and the baby is in your care. I know it’s hard to listen to the baby cry. Believe me, I know. But if I can watch and pacify the baby for the majority of the day, you can do it for an hour or two at night. Please. I need you.

On weekends, I need more breaks. Times when I can get out of the house by myself and feel like an individual. Even if it’s just a walk around the block or a trip to the grocery store. And some days when I’ve scheduled swim class and play dates, and it seems like I’ve got it all under control, I need you to offer to lend me a hand. Or suggest I go lie down during the kids’ naptime. Or start putting away the dishes without me suggesting it. I need you.

Lastly, I need to hear you’re grateful for all I do. I want to know that you notice the laundry is done and a nice dinner has been prepared. I want to know you appreciate that I breastfeed at all hours and pump when I’m at work when it would be easier for me to formula feed. I hope you notice that I never ask you to stay home from your networking events and sports activities. As the mom, it’s assumed I’ll be home all the time and always available to care for the kids while you’re out and I feed that assumption by, well, being home all the time.

I know it’s not how our parents did it, and I hate even asking. I wish I could do it all and make it look effortless. And I wish I didn’t need kudos for doing things most people expect from a mom. But I’m waving a white flag and admitting I’m only human. I’m telling you how much I need you, and if I keep going at the pace I’ve been on, I will break. And that would hurt you, the kids, and our family.

Because, let’s face it: You need me, too.

This post originally appeared on And What a Mom!

Hi! I’m Celeste. I consider myself a relatively new mom with two boys ages 4 and 2. Other titles I go by include: wife, health & wellness coach, marketing guru, avid reader (self-help books are my favorite), writer, travel/adventure seeker and fitness nut.

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7 Easy Magic Tricks the Kids Can Master

by Gabby Cullen

Conjure up serious entertainment

You and your magic-loving tykes aren’t Hogwart’s Alum? No worries, because with a little practice, and a lot of illusion, the kids will be amazing audiences (probably you) in no time. We’ve got seven easy magic tricks, and don’t forget the “Alakazam!”

easy magic trick with a dollar bill
photo: Gabby Cullen

Paperclip Magic Trick

For our first trick, we chose a simple one with a major WOW factor. A dollar bill and two paperclips are all your magician will need to get “oohs” and “ahhs” from audience members of all ages. Make the magic happen by jumping over to Kids Activity Blog for the how-to.

Color Coded Cards 

Card counting isn’t a necessary skill when performing the color card trick, which makes it perfect for tiny magicians’ assistants. Simply separate a deck into black and red stacks (without showing anyone), then ask an audience member to pick, look at, and reinsert a card; after cutting the stack, “magically” select the right card (it should be the only wrong card in a colored stack). If you’re curious about the fine print, Funology has the details.

Leak Proof Bag
photo: Shelley Massey

Awesome Illusions
Your older brainiacs may know the secret behind plastic and polymers, so this “magic” trick is a great way to have your science pros impress any younger siblings. We’ve got the scoop for any sorcerers’ assistants right here.

Disappearing Coin Magic Trick

Beginning illusionists will really need to get their hocus pocus working if they want to make a coin disappear. From sweeping the coin under the table to saying the magic words, kids trying this trick will learn that practice makes perfect, and a lot of hand waving helps. You can get the whole tutorial over at Kid Spot.

easy magic trick with a toothpick
photo: Gabby Cullen

Floating Toothpick Magic Trick

This trick gives liquid soap a little mojo (we aren’t talking dirty dishes). Getting the five toothpicks to stay in the right place while floating in the water will be your little magician’s hardest challenge. This trick is all about the science of water and surface tension, so kids will be learning a little something, too! You can find out how to master this gimmick over at Kid Zone.

magneticpenciltrick_gabbycullen_magictricks_redtricycle
photo: Gabby Cullen

Magnetic Pencil Magic Trick

From levitating, and rubber-esque scribblers, to sticking a #2 through your head; there is more than one way to perform a magic pencil trick. The one we like for beginning magicians will defy the laws of magnetic forces—the pencil will seem to be stuck to the performer’s hand. Magneto would approve! Find out how to perfect this trick here.

matchboxtrick_gabbycullen_magictricks_redtricycle
photo: Gabby Cullen

Coin-in-Matchbox Magic Trick

Presto! The classic coin-in-matchbox not only looks super cool, but after a few practice rounds, it’s a trick even a muggle can manage. You don’t need anything but the box, a coin, and a few views of this awesome tutorial from Instructables.

Related: Make Magic with Your Very Own Fairy Garden for Kids

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One Cool Thing: How to Make Your Own Bubbles

by Erin Lem

It’s the peak season for this classic kid activity

On our list of timeless traditions that never go out of style are sidewalk chalk art, jump rope, and blowing bubbles. If you’re tired of buying ready-made bubble wands, here’s how to make bubbles at home using ordinary household items that you likely already have on hand.

What You Will Need:

12 cups of water
1 cup dish soap
1 cup cornstarch
2 tbsp baking powder
1-2 wire coat hangers and a frying pan
1 6-pack plastic ring
Paper towel tube

How to Make Bubbles:

In a clean bucket or dishpan mix together the ingredients in order. Keep a ladle or scoop in the bucket and stir occasionally making sure not to cause too much foam. Remove the excess foam as it appears. When the bucket is half empty add another cup of water.

No wands handy? You can use a paper towel tube, plastic rings from a 6 pack, and even those old wire hangers! Bend the coat hanger into the shape of a loop and dip it into the frying pan letting the excess drip off before waving it through the air.

Tips for Making Perfect Bubbles:

We found that Joy and Dawn dish soap brands work the best. You can also use tear-free baby shampoo if you have little ones around. While this bubble recipe is designed and tested to work in any weather, humidity really does matter. Warm and humid days will produce the best bubbles around. If you have a windy day, try blowing downwind letting mother nature do the work for you! Make your solution a couple of days beforehand and keep the extra. A solution that has marinated for a while produces the biggest bubbles of all.

Related: 20 Cheap (or Free!) Sidewalk Games to Keep the Kids Busy

 

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Boxes, Bins & Goodbyes

By Suzanne Weerts

The day after Labor Day, as I swaddled Uncle Sam in bubble wrap and folded the red-white and blue buntings from the porch posts, stuffing them into the blue bin along with the patriotic wreath from the front door, I began to dread Christmas. I am in the blank period, one of the rare months of the year when my mantles are bare with no holiday decorations popping with color against white and cream walls.

Only January and September really, is when my house feels void of celebration, more so perhaps now, as my sons’ boxes and bins fill his room where once there was a train table. He is ready to go back to college after the longest Spring Break ever. Last year he came home in March and never left. For a time, that was literal. Our family of four never stepped beyond the white fence that separates the rose bushes from the sidewalk and there, in the front yard, we played corn hole nightly, waving at neighbors who crossed to the other side of the street in their masks, less the potential COVID-filled spittle from our cheerful hellos drift on the spring breeze through their K-95s. Weeks drifted into months and I couldn’t believe we were still holed up in the house when I took out the box of patriotic holiday decorations in May of 2020, then put it back in September, still waving at masked neighbors from 30 feet away. I bought a Halloween-themed facemask. Then I got a Christmas one of pinecones dotted with glitter.

Ours has long been a Christmas house. I have a dozen bins of decorations that I’ve treasured for decades. We’ve hosted an annual Christmas Eve party for as many as 80 people over the years. More recently it has been more like 30-40, as friends have moved to new cities or on to new traditions within their clans. But last year it was just us four. I decorated as usual, trying to bring some semblance of magic to the 28 walls that enclosed us for 9 months, a gestation period that gave birth to nothing but fear in my mind, and, perhaps an ulcer housed somewhere near my womb. And there we all sat on the couch, eating cookies, listening to Christmas music and watching Rudolph. It was lovely in a way. It was just about us, and the love for my most treasured people in the world. It was easier, less stressful, at least if you didn’t think about overflowing ICUs or the coming election. But it was also lonely. Hosting has long inspired me: a reason to cook, to shop, to wrap, to sprinkle my pixie dust on every surface. An excuse not to dust those garland-covered shelves and nooks of books. But as I boxed up those 12 bins of Santas and stockings and lighted branches of plastic pine and holly, I felt so unseen. Suddenly the three other people who were always underfoot weren’t. My efforts to create magic must indeed be magical to them because they are rarely around when what goes up comes down.

Last week, as I put away my blatant patriotism, wondering all the while if I even feel patriotic in this era of acerbic division, I am dreading finding my glittery pinecone facemask atop the boxes of gold and red ornaments. I dread wearing it to the grocery store along with my festive “Merry and Bright” sweater, knowing we may not have our party this year either. My sister and her family have moved to Montana. My husband’s siblings have refused to get vaccinated. Perhaps we’ll never have the party again now that our friends and family have learned that they can make alternate plans.

My son moves out next week. He’s taking with him the surfboards and guitars, the lamp and the desk chair along with the collages of photos of his friends that color his room like a ceaseless celebration. The boxes and bins of his life will be stored in another place as I say goodbye not just to him, but to his things.

Surely his homecomings for Thanksgiving and Christmas will inspire me to decorate. Surely the boxes of pumpkins and leaves and pinecone strands entwined with ribbon still have a place in my nest without birds? Please tell me I am not too old and tired to keep making magic. Please tell me that one of the losses from this pandemic is not the loss of my holiday spirit. Tell me that the love expressed through all our traditions and the memories of a childhood of celebrations are so expansive they can’t fit into any box.

Suzanne Weerts is a producer, writer and storyteller who (pre-pandemic) shared tales from her life on stages across Southern California. Lately she's been  indulging in way too much wine and chocolate while trying to change the world in conversations with friends on Zoom.

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Celebrate National Thank a Mail Carrier Day with These First Class Activities

by Karly Wood

Did you know that Feb. 4 is National Thank a Mail Carrier Day? In honor of this special day that honors such an important essential worker, Pikwik Pack is here to help!

The new Disney Junior series that celebrates the role of delivery workers has designed special activities to help mark the day for preschoolers and their families. To start, Pikwik Pack has created a compilation video to say “Thank You” and to get kiddos excited about celebrating National Thank a Mail Carrier Day.

Pikwik Pack has also created a printable color and black and white thank you card and checklist template for littles to use for the big day. With simple ideas like waving to your mail carrier or leaving a treat, there’s no reason not to celebrate your special delivery person! The activities will be available all February long on the activities page of the Pikwik Pack website.

To catch up with your pals from Pikwik Pack, just head to Disney Junior seven days a week to catch the fun-filled episodes.

––Karly Wood

Feature photo: iStock

 

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Chrissy Teigen & John Legend Surprised Their Kids with the Ultimate Gift on Christmas

by Erica Loop

Did your kiddos catch a glimpse of Santa sliding down the chimney? Even though Chrissy Teigen and John Legend’s three-year-old Luna and 19-month-old Miles didn’t see the man in the big red suit on the roof, they did spot Santa running across the yard—and the celebs have a video to prove it!

In an oh-so-cute Christmas clip, Teigen shard a video of Santa Claus racing through the snow and waving to Luna. Judging by the excited jumping, it’s pretty clear the three-year-old was more than thrilled to see jolly ol’ St. Nick.

Along with Luna’s squeals of pure glee, the video also features Legend shouting, ““I see Santa Claus! Oh my God, I saw Santa!”

Not only did Teigen’s fan adore the adorable video, but plenty of celebs also enjoyed the cute clip. Kelly Rowland commented, “ALL THIS CUTENESS!!” and Stacy Keibler added, “The best EVER!”

Teigen also added a sweet snowman suit-clad Christmas pic of Miles to IG, captioning it, “hello has anyone seen Santa?”

—Erica Loop

Featured photo: Chrissy Teigen via Instagram

 

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Dude Dad Is Back with a Hilarious Spoof of His Wife “Every Christmas”

by Erica Loop

Taylor Calmus, a.k.a. Dude Dad, is back at it again. The comedian dad’s newest video “My wife Every Christmas” is so right on “Target” you’ll laugh from the moment you watch it until Santa’s big day!

Calmus describes the video as, “Just a compilation of all the things my wife does and says every single Christmas as acted out by me, her husband,” and adds, “Love you babe!”—to his wife Heidi.

The clip starts out with Dude Dad, dressed as Heidi, waving buh-bye to her Thanksgiving guests and immediately heading towards a twinkle-light filled Christmas. After hanging a wreath, DudeDad/mom asks her hubby to fetch a seemingly endless stream of holiday decor picks from the attic. Of course, everything isn’t in the attic. Some, or maybe most of, what dude-mom needs is still at Target—and you totally understand.

If your holiday hectic level is currently set on high, and you need a well-deserved break, ask grandma to watch the kiddos, lock yourself in the bathroom and enjoy the three-plus minutes it takes to watch this cutely comedic clip!

—Erica Loop

Featured photo: Dude Dad via YouTube

 

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Chuck E. Cheese Has Big Plans to Roll Out Changes to 600+ Locations

by Erica Loop

Changes are coming to Chuck E. Cheese. The iconic kid–friendly fun-factory/pizza joint is getting an update—and it won’t look like what you remember from your own childhood.

After an initial announcement in 2017, it looks like Chuck E. Cheese is making good on its promise to ditch its decades-old design and the ever-epic animatronic band in more than 600 locations. While some changes have already happened in select locations, the company now plans to roll out the redo across the nation.

So what can you expect from the newly revamped Chuck E. Cheese? Reportedly, the redesign will include a modern look with sleek furniture, brighter lighting and scripted red font signs. The game play/pizza eatery’s menu will also undergo a facelift, including an expanded salad bar and options such as cauliflower crust pizza.

Along with the new look and menu, the game-time tokens you’re used to are waving buh-bye. Instead of tokens, your kiddos will now use pre-loaded play passes. If you’re wondering how this will work, a Chuck E. Cheese representative told Today, “Next time you visit your local store, you simply choose the time you want to play, starting at just $9 for 30 minutes of play.”

—Erica Loop

Featured photo: Mike Mozart via Flickr

 

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This Toddler’s Reaction to Bruce Banner Hulking Out is Everything

by Erica Loop

How did you react the first time you saw mild-mannered Bruce Banner totally Hulk out? When Irish Comedian Paddy Raff’s toddler daughter Clara saw the Marvel character go from regular guy to super-strong, her reaction was absolutely priceless.

In a recent tweet, Raff posted a cute clip of the two-year-old watching one of the Avengers flicks. As the little girl sits somewhat awestruck, she starts waving her fingering and saying, “No!” as the Hulk gets majorly destructive.

Along with the video, Raff added, “My two yr old daughter’s reaction to seeing the Hulk go bananas for the first time.” After seeing the clip, Mark Ruffalo (a.k.a. Bruce Banner) retweeted the video and added, “The secret way of stopping Dr. Banner from turning into the Hulk.”

Not only does Clara enjoy watching superheros on the screen, but the tot also seems to get a kick out of playing with big bro Ronan’s action figures. Raff also posted a pic of Clara lining the toys up to feed them breakfast!

—Erica Loop

Featured photo: Marvel Entertainment via YouTube

 

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Dear Single Mom: You Are Enough

By Anna Moore

Photo: Anna Moore

When you’re a single mom, it feels like you can never catch a break. You don’t have a partner to help even out the responsibilities. You are Mom. You are also Dad. Some days you’re superwoman and you are absolutely killing it. You’ve cleaned the bathrooms, done laundry, had sufficient amounts of caffeine, managed to get yourself out of bed on time that morning and even made pancakes for breakfast. Other days, you’re dragging. You woke up late, the house is a mess, you don’t know where to start and things are piling up.

You sometimes wonder if you’re doing the whole parenting thing wrong. Maybe it’s your fault that it’s just you. Maybe you’re what’s wrong.

I’m here to tell you that couldn’t be farther from the truth.

So much is packed into being a parent. Making sure you’re financially stable, making sure your child is taken care of while you’re at work, fixing dinner, laundry, cleaning bathrooms and changing bed sheets…the list goes on.

Don’t even get me started about all the parenting “advice” that is given so freely on the internet. You will always get the extreme opinions of any topic you research, finding that no matter how you phrase your question, you will always get a biased and very strongly worded answer thrown at you. People are quick to give you their thoughts and opinions on a situation without evaluating how they are coming across. This creates even more confusion and negative thoughts within the individual looking for guidance.

I asked my daughter one time if she’d be happy if it were just the two of us for the rest of her life. I didn’t get answers about cleaning or doing laundry. I got a very excited response about how we could have movie night every night and have our favorite snacks and have hot tea together. Of course, those are all things we could still do if I were married. The point I’m trying to make is that children’s minds work very differently from ours. An advantage of the mind of a child is that they see the positive in every situation, leaving adults longing for a mind like a child.

Not only am I a single mom, but I was a teen mom as well. Talk about a double whammy. Being fifteen and pregnant, nobody thinks you can make anything of yourself after that. You’re told that your life is over. Everything you’ve hoped and dreamed for yourself is now impossible. Which is why I went on to finish high school—half a semester early. I went to community college for two years and graduated Cum Laude. I finished my bachelors in Psychology from my University and had above a 3.2 GPA.

Being a single mom, being a young mom, doesn’t mean that your life is over. It just means you get to share it with someone who idolizes you, who thinks the world of you, who is always cheering for you. No matter what. Sharing experiences with the person you gave life to. Your built-in best friend.

I was able to cross the stage at my graduation seven months ago and look up at my seven-year-old daughter with tears in my eyes. She was beaming from ear to ear, waving and blowing kisses. In that moment, she didn’t care that I had laundry piled up at home. In that moment, she didn’t care that I’d forgotten to give her a drink with her breakfast last week. In that moment, she didn’t care that it was just the two of us.

In that moment, I was enough, and you are, too.

 

 

 

 

Hey, y'all! I'm a single mom to my seven year old daughter. I've loved writing all of my life, and love to share stories...most of which relate to parenting. Also sometimes our cat...Sir Gibson Severus Darcy. Yeah...it's a thing. Enjoy!

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