Being a better mom is NOT trying harder.
We are generally taught that more is better. But, when you want to be a better mom, or human, actually LESS is more. Doing less, trying less, having less… Believe it or not, less is better.
10 Commandments of How to be a Badass Mom
1. Thou shalt NOT do #allthethings
We don’t need to be martyrs for our families in order to be great parents. What we really need to do is take care of ourselves so that we can take care of others.
Sacrificing yourself to the point that being busy and being exhausted is a way of life is NOT badass.
2. Thou shalt validate oneself.
Kids are different. Families are different. Circumstances are different. And, we are capable of making educated, conscientious decisions that are best for us, in that moment. We don’t need outside validation for that.
3. Thou shalt say what one means.
Being a badass, rebel mom is saying YES to the things that we want to say yes to and NO to the things that we don’t want to do.
When we are a badass mom, we say what we mean, and we do what we say, without feeling guilty.
4. Thou shalt not explain oneself.
Remember, children need to explain themselves, adults do not. Make your decisions and own them. Period.
5. Thou shalt ask for help.
Being a badass is about having the courage to ask for help when you need it. And, delegating the things that you can’t do or don’t want to do.
6. Thou shalt be vulnerable.
Brene Brown said that “Vulnerability sounds like truth and feels like courage. Truth and courage aren’t always comfortable, but they are never weakness.”
Being vulnerable creates self-acceptance and confidence.
7. Thou shalt not compare oneself to others.
People, circumstances, and families are all different. The second that you compare yourself to another, you are discrediting yourself and undervaluing your worth.
8. Thou shalt celebrate oneself.
When did we stop celebrating us? Take 5-minutes to pat yourself on the back, tell yourself how amazing you are, and reflect on how far you’ve come.
9. Thou shalt forgive oneself.
Living life with unforgiveness of ourselves is like living life believing that there is a looming hammer over our heads waiting to drop down at any moment.
When we release ourselves and no longer feel like we are going to be punished spontaneously and brutally, we release that throbbing worry and live a life of freedom.
10. Thou shall not focus on what one can’t control.
Let’s worry about circumstances that we can control rather than the ones that we cant’t. When we focus our energy on that, our impact becomes significant.
Being a badass is not doing #allthethings and being able to #slayallday – it’s making time to be present and having the ability to be flexible. Can we just be un-fucking-productive for 5-minutes? That’s living.
I realize that many of these commandments are easier said than done, however, practice makes perfect :) Follow these commandments as best you can, and soon it will be effortless.
Be a rebel. Invest in yourself without feeling guilty. We are not meant to just SURVIVE motherhood but THRIVE through motherhood.
Because actually, we CAN have it all.
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