Kids and jokes are a match made in heaven. (We find the sillier, cornier and punnier, the better.) Take your family’s joking up a notch with these NYC-centric goofs that hopefully won’t make you gag! (See what we did there?) Got a great NYC joke of your own? Send it our way and we’ll add it to our list!

photo: Mimi O'Connor

1.What's a New Yorker's favorite storm?

A Cyclone.

2. How do the Brooklyn and Manhattan Bridges communicate? 

In span-ish.

3. Why was the bagel store robbed?

The lox were broken. 

4. What did the angry pepperoni say?

You wanna pizza me? 

5. Where do New York chefs get their broth? 

The Stock Exchange.

6. What do you call a barber in the Bronx?

A Yankee Clipper.

7. What did the Atlantic Ocean say to the sand? 

Nothing, it just waved. 

8. Where’s the best place to charge your phone in NYC?

Battery Park.

9. Where did the rooster live?

In a co-op.

10. How do New Yorkers show affection?

They’ll give you a hug and a knish.

11. How did the sailor get around the city?

He took Ocean Parkway.

12. What’s the best street for moving trucks? 

Broadway.

photo: Rockefeller Center

13. What is the landscaper’s favorite museum?

Mow-Ma.

14. Where do the Rolling Stones love to perform?

Rock Center.

15. What museum do comedians love?

The Wit-ney

16. What’s the coziest spot in New York?

Snug Harbor

photo: Mimi O'Connor

17. Where did the math teacher like to hang out?

Times Square

18. Who do kids in Chelsea hang out with?

Their piers. 

19. Can a kid jump higher than the Statue of Liberty? 

Of course, silly. The Statue of Liberty can't jump!

—Mimi O’Connor

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