If you’ve spent any time scrolling through our big list of jokes for kids you might have noticed that many of them are sent in to our editor (amber at redtri.com) directly from hilarious kids themselves. So we’ve rounded them up into one hysterically funny and adorable collection. Read on for the best silly, sweet, totally clean jokes for kids (by kids!).

photo: iStock

1. What is a computer's favorite snack?

Computer chips!!
—reader Rebecca K.

2. What part of your body can cause the end of the world?

Your apoco-lips!

—AJ, age 8!

Owwwww-ch! (by Henrik, age 5)

3. What day of the week are most twins born on?

Twos-day! 

(submitted by reader Scooter T.!) 

4. What did one horse say to the other horse?

Neigh!

What did the kid say to the horse?

Hey! 

What did the mane say to the horse?

Nothing, you silly, a mane can't talk. 

—Henrik, age 8 

5. What do you call a fly with no wings?

A walk. 

—Jasper L., young reader submitted!

 

 

6. Have you heard the one about the student who was afraid of negative numbers?

He'll stop at nothing to avoid them.
 
7. What do you call it when a hammock teases another hammock?
Hammockery!
 
—Joe L., age 8
 

8. What has four wheels and flies?

A garbage truck!

—Lewis G.

9. Two goats were munching on a movie script. 

Goat 1: This is good!
Goat 2: The book was better.

—reader submitted by Mr. Jeffry

10. What do you call a monkey at the North Pole?

Lost.

—submitted by Stella D.

11. What do you call a nun who sleepwalks?

A roamin' Catholic.

—Janice B., a reader like you!

12. Why do birds fly south?

It's too far to walk.

—Pearl, age 10

13. What did the traffic light say to the cars?

Don't look, I'm changing!

—reader, age 6

14. How do they answer the phone at the paint store?

Yellow!

—Lily, age 6

15. Why did Humpty Dumpty have a great fall?

To make up for his miserable summer.

—reader submitted by Kaci Y.

16. What do you call two monkeys that share an Amazon account?

Primemates!

—Merci P., aged 10

17. What snack should you make for the Snowman Holiday Party?

Ice Krispy Treats

—Emmerson H., age 13

18. Why do scissors always win a race?

Because they take a shortcut!

—Foster, age 5

19. How do you stop a bull from charging? 

You unplug it!
 

—Jadyn, Age 12

photo: iStock

20. What’s yellow and looks like pineapple?

A lemon with a new haircut. 

—submitted (and created) by Rafael L. 

21. What do you call a deer with no eyes?

"No eye-deer." 

—also sent in by young Raffy 
 

22. What word starts with the letter t, ends with the letter t, and has t in it?

A teapot!

—young reader Collin S.

23. It took 10 workers 10 days to build a bridge.  How long would it take 5 workers to build the same bridge?

None—it’s already built!

—Liam, age 7

24. How do you make the word Tiger longer?

Ti-grrrh

—Kabir, Age 9

25. How do you clean chicken?  -

Put it in dishwasher.

—Kabir, Age 9

photo: Burst via Pexels

26. What did the dad say to his daughter at the cook out? 
 
This grill is on fire!
 

—Jadyn, 12 (This kid is on fire! 🤣)

27. Why did the king go to the bathroom?

He wanted to sit on the throne.

—Eric, age 10

 
28. What is a pirate's favorite body part?

 
The booty!

—C.J., age 9
 

29. If it takes two men to dig a hole in one day how long would it take for one man to dig a half a hole?           

There is no such thing as a half a hole.

—Eric, age 10
 

30. How do cats bake cake?

From scratch.
 

—reader Jacey

31. What is brown and sticky?

A stick.

—young reader Kohen

 

photo: iStock

32. There's a girl on a boat in a pretty pink coat. What's her name?

What.

—Ray, age 9

33. Where does a rat go when it has a toothache?

 To the rodentist.
 
—Ray, age 9!
 

34. What does an alien do when it is bored in school?

Spaces out.
 
—Ray! (they are on a roll!), age 9
 

35. What does a broken plate say when she gets her cupcake?

Is this GLUE-ten free?

—Guess who? Ray! age 9

photo: iStock

39. What did the kid learn about knowledge?

It was all knowing.

—Reader submitted by Deziree
 

40. Why didn't the hyena cross the road?

He was too busy laughing.

—reader submitted by Gillian P.
 

41. What's a rabbit's favorite music?

Hip-hop.

—Henrik P.
 
 

42. What did they say when Marie Curie and Albert Einstein said the same thing at the same time?

Greatest minds think alike!

—Henrik, age 9

43. What do you call babies in the army?

Infantry! 

—Joe L., age 9

44. What is a cat's favorite color?
Purrr-ple! 
 
—Olivia W., age 7 

45. Why did the dragon cross the road?

Because he was too chicken to fly!       
 
—Joshua Y. 
 
 

46. Who won the race of princesses?

Rapunzel, By a hair!

—Josh Y! 
 

47. What did the egg say when it was late for breakfast?

I have to scramble!
 
—our buddy, Joshua Y. 
 

48. How do you stop a bull from charging?

You take away its credit card!

—Joshua Y. 

 

49. Where does the T-rex go shopping?

The dino store!

—Joshua Y., age 9 

50. Why was the rabbit happy?

Because somebunny loved him!

—Guess who? Joshua Y.! 

51. What did the pear say to the shoeless?

You need a pair of shoes. 

—reader submitted by Rose A. 

52. What do you call a bear with no ear?

A "B"

—Alexis R. 

53. What would happen if the dean lost his job?
He would lose his "ideanity." 

—Joshua Y. 

54. Why did the baby cross the road? 
 
To get to the whine shop!
—Matilda C., age 7
 
55. Why shouldn’t you trust stairs?

Because they are always up to something.

—Ryder, Age 3!!! 
 

photo: iStock

56. Why did the scarecrow win an award?

Because he was out standing in his field.

—Suzanna R. 

57. What do you call a cat burrito?

A purrito

—Rosewyn age 8 and 3 quarters 

58. What kind of key opens a banana?

A monkey!

—Rosewyn age 8 and 3 quarters 

59. How do you get a cat to code?

You Scratch it!
 

—Musegirl, 8

60. Why was the man mad at the clock?

He was ticked off!

—Nolan A. age 8

 

61. What is the strongest kind of shoe?

Under Armor!

—Liam A. age 9

 
 

62. Why did Rudolph have a bad report card?

 

Because he went down in History!

—Sreeja K., age 8 
 

63. Why don't scientists trust atoms?

Because they make up everything!

—Sreeja K., age 8 

64. Why can't you spell dark with a "c", so it says "darc"?

Because you can't c in dark!

—Shivani age 8

65. How do you clean a chicken?

An egg wash! 

—MB, age 12 

66. What's Joanna Gaines' favorite snack food?

Chips

—H.P., aged 9

 
 
67. Why didn’t the skeleton cross the road?

He didn't have the guts. 

—Londynn, 9
 

68. What do you do when an astronaut’s wife is upset?

Give her some space.

—Jaden, 11
 

Are you a kid with a joke to add? Send it to amber@redtri.com and we’ll put it in the story!

 

—Amber Guetebier

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