Between taking your own Zoom calls in between your kids’ online schooling sessions and ordering takeout for the fourth time this week, it can be easy to feel like you’re not cutting it in the parent department (2020, need we say more?). But, enough with the mom guilt. Whether it’s a mantra or a life goal, it’s essential to find something that you can tell yourself every day in order to stay positive. We talked to the experts and came with 12 easy statements to get you started. Keep reading to see them all.
1. I am a good parent. It's easy to criticize ourselves and focus on how we think we're failing as a mom or dad. But parenting is tough, and we're all doing the best we can. Acknowledge that fact, and tell yourself out loud, every day, that you're a good parent.
2. Loving myself is the greatest gift I can give to my child. Kids are sponges and they learn from us. So if your kiddos know you appreciate yourself, they will learn to love themselves. That's one of the greatest gifts we can give our kids.
3. I’m not perfect. We all know that nobody is perfect. But we place a big expectation on ourselves as parents to be pretty close to it. Repeating that mantra is a great reminder that it's okay to be human, not to be perfect.
4. I can only control myself. The only person you can really control is yourself. It's so hard, but one of the best ways to help kids grow emotionally is to exhibit mature behavior. Debbie Pincus, MS LMHC says, "When we react emotionally to our kids and lose control, we’re allowing our kids to determine how we behave rather than the other way around." Next time your kiddo throws a massive fit, try to stay calm and see what happens.
5. Today is a new day. It's easy to focus on how yesterday was a bad day. Sanah Rizvi, the founder of The Psych Way, suggests changing the self-talk to focus on how every day is a chance to make progress and change to whatever you want and be whoever I want to be.
6. I’m doing the best I can do. At the end of the day, that's all we can do. Repeating that mantra every day will help you accept it as truth.
7. I make good decisions for my kids. This is a tough mantra to remember, especially when little ones are very vocal about making their displeasure for our decisions known. Parent Trust points out that moms and dads know they're making the right choices for their kids. Embrace it and repeat the statement to yourself as a reminder.
8. I’m going easy on myself today. Give yourself permission to take it easy. Say it out loud and embrace freedom.
9. Parenting is exhausting. Every parent knows this statement to be true. Lauren Tamm, the writer of The Military Wife and Mom, suggests repeating this mantra as a reminder that taking care of kids is hard work. No wonder we're so tired at the end of the day!
10. I am loved. Motherhood can be a thankless job, and little ones aren't known for their compliments. Nicole Schwarz, parent coach and family therapist, reminds moms to keep in mind that even though our kiddos may not say it, know that you are loved and repeat it as a daily mantra.
11. I am what my kiddo needs. At the end of the day, there's nothing else that's as true as that statement.
12. It won't always be like this. Although it does feel like this year has been suspended in time, one thing we know for sure is that hardships always pass. From colicky babies to distance learning to pandemics, one day, you'll find yourself on the other side.
—Leah R. Singer with Gabby Cullen