While I still feel like there is another child missing from our home, the reality of the matter is that having another baby will require a larger than normal miracle. Infertility has stolen away so much from me and now it’s taken the ability to give my son a living sibling to play with here on Earth since his brother lives in Heaven.
I’ve had two months of living as a “OADNBC” (One and Done: Not By Choice), minus a small freak out and trying/failing at Clomid, and 98% of the time I’m seriously totally ok with this. Its just that stupid nagging 2% that gets me when I least expect it.
I’ve compiled a list to remind myself how awesome having one Earthly child can be ….for when that 2% sneaks up on me.
1. We will have more time to spend with him and him alone. While going through our last FET, it really worried me to think about splitting my attention and time equally between two children. Especially a toddler and an infant. How do people do this exactly? Good thing I don’t have to find out! He gets Mommy and Daddy 100%.
2. We will have more money and be financially better off. We don’t bring in huge salaries. We’re an average middle class family and spend our money on bills and groceries. My kid eats SOOOOO much!!! How could we possibly afford to feed another bottomless pit like him!? We will also only have one college fund to pay into … one child to send to sports camps … one allowance to dole out … etc.
3. I’m almost done with diapers. What? Seriously. This is almost over. Let that one sink in a bit.
4. We only have a few years left of needing childcare. He will be in school in three years. Yesssssss!!!
5. Traveling is easier. Its cheaper and easier to navigate around travel spots with one child to keep an eye on.
6. We don’t need to buy a new vehicle. We are thinking about getting an SUV once our cars fall apart but the minivan life is not happening.
7. I never have to break up fights between siblings.
8. My house is quiet. My son is a watcher and a thinker. He yells and screams when he’s mad but for the most part he’s pretty chill.
9. He will never feel better or less than his sibling(s). Teachers will never say “Why aren’t you as good as your brother/sister?” or “Oh you’re so in so’s brother huh? Ohhh boy.”
10. He will always be his own person with no one to be compared to.
I was an only child and my childhood was pretty awesome